Dance Moms Recap: Broadway Or Bust


Hey, y'all!  Remember last week's Dance Moms when Abby Lee Miller was slightly supportive of her dancers?  Yeah, that was short lived!  Last night's episode had a bitter Abby back to wreck her talented troupe's self-esteem.  Good times! 

The girls and moms enter the studio, and Abby is actually happy and proud of the girls' performance at last week's competition.  This week, the dancers are headed to compete in Michigan.  During the pyramid, Brooke is on the bottom, and Abby is livid that she talked to Nia when she forgot her routine.  Abby gets even angrier when Kelly laughs at her daughter's mishap, and she dismisses Brooke from for the competition.  MacKenzie is also on the bottom for not resting her injured foot.  Nia's outstanding Rosa Parks performance is also on th bottom, and all Abby can say is that Rosa herself would have been proud.  So then why is she on the bottom?  Kendall rounds out the bottom.  Chloe and Paige are on second row for a winning duet.  Maddie is on top, and Abby believes she deserves a standing ovation.

Kendall receives a solo, and Abby wants her to work on stamina.  Chloe also gets a solo.  She has the two run in place silently.  Maddie will be dancing a duet with sister MacKenzie entitled "Run From Mother."  The group routine is called "Gold Digga" but that is all the information that Abby is willing to give.  Abby explains to the girls exactly what a gold digger is.  In the viewing area, Melissa is sporting a wedding band and reveals that she was married the previous Monday in the dress the moms picked out for her.  Kelly gushes that she was able to keep the secret given that Paige was in attendance at the ceremony.  Melissa shares camera phone shots of the nuptials. 


Abby's surprise for the group routine arrives, and it's the girl who stars in the Flashdance tour and has performed on Broadway.  The girls are excited to meet Rochelle, and the moms are shocked to see Abby bring in an outside choreographer.  They should be thrilled because Rochelle is a much kinder teacher than Abby, and she has to die for legs.  Abby likes Rochelle's energy, but she isn't sure that she's teaching the routine fast enough. 


The next day, Abby gets on Brooke for being eight minutes late to class, but she's earlier than Kendall and Jill.  Sidebar, what the heck kind of tiger face sweater is Jill wearing?  Frightening.  Kelly is slamming doors, and Abby yells at her.  Kelly can't be bothered by Abby's cattiness as she's too busy telling the moms about how they need to do cellophane body wraps to have Rochelle's figure.  Abby is now responsible for working on spacing in the group routine since Rochelle was just there for one day, and she's now changing up the whole routine.  She calls out Chloe for not immediately grasping the changes, and poor Nia feels uncomfortable for having to "introduce herself" to her friend who has been on suspension.  Christi tries to placate her teary daughter.  After working with Melissa's girls for a hot minute, she has Chloe working on her edgy '80's solo.  Holly is complimenting Chloe's execution, and when the poor girl falls out of an aerial, Abby dismisses her to go cry to her mom.  So much for the slightly nice Abby from last week!

At Kelly's house, the moms come together to get wrapped by a professional while mainlining red wine.  A skeptical Jill is up first, and these women should have bought stock in Saran Wrap before this party.  Melissa reveals that she and Kelly are all about walking around in their birthday suits.  TMI.  Holly doesn't say anything, but I can tell from her face that she agrees with me.

Kendall's solo is in the style of the roaring '20's.  The moms think this is the perfect dance to showcase Kendall's skills.  While rehearsing the group dance, Abby decides to pull MacKenzie due to her inability to keep up with her peers.  She also wants the spotlight to be on Kendall.  Melissa is making excuses for her younger daughter, and Kelly gets angry that MacKenzie basically replaced Brooke in the troupe when she can't execute the same moves.  The moms wonder what Rochelle would think to know that her choreography has been totally revamped.


The ALDC gets off the bus in Michigan, and Abby immediately starts in on Kendall's stamina.  She has Kendall do a wall sit while she barks orders, and Jill is understandably upset by this bout of public humiliation.  Why does Abby feel the need to try to break these girls before they are even given the opportunity to fail?  Abby even threatens MacKenzie's future in dance if she holds back her sister during their duet.  Christi knows that Chloe is beyond nervous, and she gives her daughter some tips on how to channel her inner rocker chick.

Kendall performs first, and her face lessons from last episode are paying off during her solo.  Kendall hopes she has what it takes to beat Chloe.  Backstage, Maddie is giving her little sister a pep talk.  While Maddie is clearly the stronger dancer (and she would be regardless of her partner), MacKenzie totally holds her own.  Chloe takes the stage next, and Abby couldn't look any more disinterested.  Chloe is like Pat Benatar if Pat Benatar was a lyrical dancer.  Unfortunately, Chloe follows her mother's advice and give a KISS inspired tongue move as she exits the stage.  While I agree with Abby that it was inappropriate, she didn't know any better, and it totally fit her routine.

The tension is high as the girls prepare for the group dance, and the moms are trying to build up all the dancers.  Rochelle arrives, and Abby explains that she had to tweak the number a bit.  Christi hopes that the changes piss off Rochelle.  Rochelle wants to see the new choreography, and she's not on board with MacKenzie being pulled from the routine.  There is about to be a face off between the ladies, and the moms are loving every second of it.  Abby believes that Rochelle is an amazing performer, but she's not a choreographer like Abby…as far as Abby is concerned. Rochelle leaves to go to her own rehearsal, and Abby calls out the star for not putting together costumes and make-up cues.  Abby has the best of both worlds…if the girls fail, she can blame Rochelle.  If they succeed, she will take all the credit.


MacKenzie performs with the group, and I think they look great.  Of course, what do I know?  The moms seem impressed, but Abby thinks that MacKenzie should never have been allowed to dance.  She goes so far as to say that she hopes the judges weren't watching her youngest dancer.  When it's time for awards, Kendall's solo garners a third place finish, with Chloe taking the top spot.  Boo-ya, Abby!  The sisters' duet also gets first place.  Rochelle's group number also earns the top spot, and, not shockingly, Abby takes all the credit.  After all, Rochelle was only with them for a few practices…Abby has been molding these girls since birth.  Gag.  When the moms tout Rochelle, Abby goes off on Kendall for practicing her solo backstage where the audience could see her.  Are you kidding me?  When Jill interjects that Maddie, Chloe, and MacKenzie did the same, the women get in a screaming match.  Abby then goes off on Chloe exiting the stage with the KISS tongue.  Abby didn't get her "I told you so" moment when Rochelle's choreography worked out, so she's grasping at straws.  I mean, Chloe won!  What does she have to complain about?  Ridiculous. 

Next week, a new girl joins the group, and Cathy is back with a vengeance.  Abby decides to have her dead pooch stuffed for posterity. 


[Photo Credit: Lifetime]