You never know which Abby Lee Miller you're going to get when you tune in to Dance Moms.  Will she be nice?  Excited?  Motivational?  Nah, she just loves stirring the pot, causing rifts between the mothers, and planning for the downfall of Cathy and her Candy Apples.  Perhaps she'll throw in some taxidermy along the way…

We begin, as always, with pyramid time.  Thankfully, the girls are coming off a big win at last week's competition.  Abby switches it up by starting at the top…and Maddie is right back where she's always been.  On the next rung is an excited PaigeKendall joins Paige for being third, which, according to Abby, is better than second.  Chloe is in the next spot even though she's been consistent with her top notch dancing.  Nia is first on the bottom for flying under the radar.  She's good, but not great.  MacKenzie follows with Brooke who didn't dance last week…per Abby's orders.  Abby shocks her troupes by adding Asia to the bottom of the pyramid as the newest team member.  Asia competed on Abby's other show, and Abby warns the mothers about running off another mom.

This week, the dancers are heading to Michigan, and Cathy and her Candy Apples will be in attendance.  The group number is called "Return to Grace," and it focuses on reincarnation.  MacKenzie and Asia will be sitting out the group number.  Kendall, Maddie, and Chloe will be dancing a jazz trio.  Asia is gifted the only solo.  As Abby works on the group number, the moms (especially Jill) are curious to see what the new mom will bring to the table. 


In Ohio, Cathy does her own half-baked pyramid with her boy dancers.  She's not willing to be second to Abby for another week.  Not shockingly, Cathy brings in another guest choreographer.  John is a Mr. Dance (or something…that's totally not right!) winner…and he also happens to be one of Abby's good friends.  Oooh, quite the twist!


At her studio, Abby is considering her options for her recently passed pooch.  Melissa recommends a great taxidermist.  Wait, what?  Please no.  Melissa shares Abby's dead dog plans with the other moms who are rightfully disturbed.  As the mothers cackle, Abby works with the trio.  Melissa is very nervous about Asia coming in to potentially take MacKenzie's place, so she's you tubing everything she can about the young dancer.  The other moms find it funny that Melissa feels threatened.

Jill and her new hair color is very wary about meeting Asia and her mom Kristie.  Jill is fine with another dancer, but she draws the line at welcoming a new mother.  Asia and her mom arrive, and Abby warns Kristie not to be intimidated by the other women.  Abby predicts that MacKenzie, knowing that the new girl is serious competition, will keep her friends close and her enemies Asia closer.  Holly and the other women are curious as to why Abby wants MacKenzie and Melissa to be on pins and needles.

Hey Cathy!  Coca-Cola called and it wants to sue you for infringing on its logo with your awful studio sign.  Cathy's has one of her boys working with a female dancer on a Latin number. 

Jill remembers how horrible the other moms were to her when she started at ALDC, and she hopes that the other women will treat Asia's mom in the same manner.  Christi Kristie 2.0 has just arrived from Korea where her daughter has been working on a television show.  The mothers try to run Kristie through the gauntlet, but she's well versed at holding her own.  Abby is working with Asia on her solo, and she hopes to draw out a cuter side of the little girl instead of Asia's regular sassy demeanor.  Kristie meets with Abby to share how she is being treated by the other moms, and the new mom is surprised to learn that Abby would be happy to be rid of some of the women.


The girls and their moms catch the bus on the day of the competition, and Jill gets on Christi Kristie 2.0 for stealing her seat.  She must maintain her status on the bus.  The moms are curious as to why Abby isn't riding with them, but she's busy meeting with the taxidermist.  The decision to stuff her dog is monumental for Abby.  Kristie joins in with the laughter when it comes to Abby's pooch corpse.  The original Christi takes the opportunity to stir the pot regarding MacKenzie and Asia, and Melissa stutters her rebuttal.  She knows that Asia could never replace her daughter.  An emotional Abby arrives at the competition, and Asia is dressed like an overly sexed swan.  Or is she a dalmatian?  The new version of Christi urges her daughter to take advantage of her new opportunity in light of the extra bone in MacKenzie's foot.  That's a new excuse, Melissa!  Abby walks Asia out to the staging area and hugs on her friend John when she sees him in the hallway.  Cathy is clearly annoyed that her plan hasn't rattled Abby like she'd intended.


Asia takes the stage for her solo, and I feel like Benson and Stabler should be investigating the underbelly of the dancing world for exploiting children.  Without question, Asia is crazy talented, but geez.  Kristie is willing to take Abby's criticism, and the mom's attack her for being so naive.  Abby immediately makes Asia do push-ups for her flexed feet, and the moms wonder if Kristie is still Abby's biggest fan. 

The trio is next to dance, and they are up against Cathy's Latin duet.  Cathy's kids are first to perform, and they should be recruited for a junior version of Dancing with the Stars.  Fabulous!  Of course, Maddie, Chloe, and Kendall are remarkable.  In my eyes, Chloe and Maddie can do no wrong, although I'm sure Abby will prove me wrong.  Surprisingly, Abby thinks they did an amazing job.  In the group competition, Cathy's boys dance for food.  It's Newsies meets Oliver, but they are much more talented than I could ever hope to be.  To be honest, I find their routine a tad boring, but Abby's moms find it to be beautiful.  They worry their daughters have some serious competition.  Abby believes the boys' choreography is brilliant.  Clearly, I'm no critic.  The girls dance beautifully, but again, what do I know?


Asia wins first place for her solo, and Abby is thrilled…Melissa, not so much.  The trio scores second place to Cathy's Latin ballroom number.  Cathy's boys also take number one in the group dance with the only perfect score of the competition.  See?  I'm horrible at judging these kids.  Cathy's parents crash Abby's staging area to make passive aggressive digs.  No one likes a sore winner.  Cathy and Abby get into a screaming match, and even though it's scripted, I'm embarrassed for both of them. 

Next week, Maddie and Chloe are competing against one another.  Abby calls Kendall a rat, and Holly and new Kristie get into a screaming match.


[Photo Credit: Lifetime]

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