Dance Moms Recap: Sour Apples

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Have y'all missed Cathy and the Candy Apples?  Abby Lee Miller certainly has not, and we got to hear all about it on last night's Dance Moms.  Is it just me, or has this been like the longest season in the show's history?  Geez Louise!

After touting her recital as a raving success, Abby goes straight into the pyramid.  Not surprisingly, Paige is on the bottom for not participating, followed by sister Brooke.  Abby rants on about how she was giving Brooke the opportunity to resurrect her old song, but that Kelly loves to thwart her daughters' happiness at every turn.  Kelly, Brooke, and Paige are not in attendance.  Surprisingly, Asia is after Brooke, and for once, Jill and Christi may get to see more tears (they love when Asia cries, don't they?).  Asia will never be allowed to dress herself after that backwards pants fiasco.  Nia rounds out the bottom for just being mediocre, and Holly speaks up that Abby never gives her daughter extra time.

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Mackenzie is the last rung on the second tier for not being nerdy enough in the photo shoot, and Maddie is in third (What?  Seriously?  Stop the presses!) for not immediately volunteering herself to do the extra solo during the showcase.  In the second spot is Chloe for being "the MVP" of the recital, and Kendall gets the top spot for edging out her friends in the photo shoot.  This week, every girl will be dancing in the group number.  The moms are worried when they hear that their girls will be up against the Candy Apples because Cathy always brings out the extra crazy in Abby.  Chloe, Kendall, and Nia will be dancing a trio.  Abby admits that she was originally going to have Maddie dance instead of Nia, but she wants Nia to have the chance to prove herself.  She also uses the opportunity to remind Maddie that if she doesn't volunteer to be featured, Abby won't feature her.  Ouch.

Cathy has a new crew, including precious Lucas from the now defunct Dance Moms: Miami.  Cathy reveals that she and Lucas' mom are actually very good friends…on Facebook.  Nikya and Black Patsy are also in attendance, along with Botox mom and some other forgettable characters.  Botox mom fills in the newbies on Abby's moms as Cathy relishes in Anthony's technically perfect choreography.

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Abby is excited to use some beach themed props in the group number, and Holly is concerned that she may have picked the wrong time to ask for her daughter to have extra attention.  With Brooke and Paige absent, Abby is ready to show all the team members that everyone is easily replaceable.  Knowing that Cathy will be at the competition has Abby even more on edge, and the moms believe the group number is lacking.  As if on cue, Payton and her cray-cray mother Leslie arrive.  While Payton's smart mouth has gotten her in hot water in the past, she is just the leader that Abby needs with the troupe.  Christi thinks that Leslie is just scrappy and insane enough to take on Cathy's moms.  The moms joke about how to retaliate against Cathy and Black Patsy.

Cathy is dining with Vivi and her mother, and, again, I wonder if Lifetime thinks that this set is actually a believable pass for a restaurant.  After discussing the upcoming competition, Cathy invites her mother to join her dancers and face Abby for the first time since the reunion.  A bored Vivi looks on (I like her more and more) as her grandmother discusses her past as a tap dancing Granny Apple.

The moms are concerned about the trio, and Leslie is making herself comfortable in Kelly's position.  Jill gets peeved that Leslie wants her fifteen year old to dance with a bunch of ten year olds.  The other mothers thinks that if Kelly brought back Brooke, Payton would get the boot.  Jill does remind the group that the women need to stick together as a united front against Cathy and her revolving door of moms.

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At Cathy's studio, she promises the moms that Anthony will keep his harsh criticism to a minimum.  Yeah, Anthony doesn't play by Cathy's rules, and he gives her the hand while rehearsing the troupe's spy-themed trio.  Their egos go head-to-head, and Anthony threatens to mutiny with some of Cathy's crew.  It's time for the ALDC and the Apples to face off at the competition.  While Abby initially thinks that Leslie is a better addition than Kelly, Payton's smart mouth quickly changes her mind.  Meanwhile, in the Apples staging area, Cathy is hyping up her trio to beat Nia, Chloe, and Kendall.  Abby urges her moms to ignore the Apples at all costs.  Of course, when Kristie 2.0 gets into it with Botox mom, Abby quickly leads her away.

The Candy Apple trio is cute, but it's not fabulous.  Abby's trio's choreography is much more difficult, and Nia's performance garners praise from Abby.  I'm thrilled for sweet Nia, although I thought she was a tad off in parts.  It was still a wonderful trio!  The Candy Apples are getting ready for their Four Seasons number, and Botox mom is painting ab muscles on her daughter.  Sounds about right!  It's actually a cool routine, and even Abby seems impressed.  Likewise, the ALDC hits every mark.  It was much better than I expected after watching the limited rehearsal time.

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The Candy Apples trio places seventh place while Abby's girls get fifth.  In the group competition, Cathy's kids place third while the ALDC tops every group with the highest score.  Christi can't even let the girls enjoy their victory before telling Leslie that she better not get used to Kelly's spot.  Abby is gloating as Cathy and her mothers come in to "congratulate" Abby's moms and sic Anthony's mother on Jill.  Christi (am I seeing this right??) steps in to break up the ruckus, reminding the ladies (and I use that term loosely) that it is just a dance competition.

Next week, the moms feud with Leslie and beg Kelly to return.

TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT'S EPISODE?  WERE YOU AS SURPRISED AS I WAS TO SEE THAT ABBY WASN'T AS HATEFUL AS NORMAL?

[Photo Credit: Lifetime]

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