Mob Wives Recap: From Mentor To Mental

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I hate to be a pill because I love reality television, but last night I had to watch the Sugar Bowl during the Mob Wives' commercials. What a game (and I wasn't even invested in the outcome!)! Well, the craziness I was watching on the field paled in comparison to what was going on in Vegas with Renee Graziano's hard fall off the wagon!

After the insanity of the night before, Big Ang has ordered a big breakfast in hopes of resolving their issues and curing their hangovers. Alicia DiMichele Garofalo is worried about Renee. She is tired of drama, and she wants to enjoy her last trip before potential incarceration. Renee and Drita D'avanzo arrive at breakfast, and Renee is looking just as rough as she was the night before. Drita admits that she lost over two grand gambling, and she takes suggestions as to how to lie to Lee about her loss. Drita knows that Renee is going to be a ticking time bomb over her animosity towards Natalie Guercio. She starts swearing and chain smoking at the mention of her name. 

Drita decides that everyone needs to be present for the airing of the grievances (Happy Festivus!), so she goes to get Natalie. Showing her new found maturity, Drita warns Natalie about the confrontation that awaits her. While Drita isn't a Natalie fan, she remembers what it's like to be ganged up on by the ladies. Drita takes a few seconds to tell Natalie all of the shiz she's said about her behind her back, and Natalie apologizes with a hug. Natalie promises to explain herself to Big Ang as well. When Natalie joins the table, Renee begins to point out all of the delicious things on the table. Grapes are delicious, as are pastries. Her man (one date makes a man?)? NOT DELICIOUS! Natalie assures Renee that she wasn't intending to be disrespectful, but she doesn't think her word choice was inappropriate. Renee does a reenactment calling Alicia's husband delicious to make her point. Natalie then quips that Renee should know Alicia's husband smells delicious since they went to dinner together a few times. 


As smoke spews from Renee's ears, she tries to jerk Natalie up from the table like a child. Renee starts throwing dishes and shard of glass comes dangerously close to Alicia. Natalie takes a quick break from their verbal brawl to make sure her friend is okay and questions whether Renee is on something to be throwing things around like a crazy person. Natalie tries to explain to Renee that she's tried to talk to her and apologize and only been met with a psycho. True story. A switch flips and Renee decides to start cleaning up and decides to start pointing her finger in Drita's face. Drita promptly shuts her down. 

Natalie keeps trying to explain herself when Renee straight up calmly walks over to her and puts her in a crazy headlock. What the hell? Renee is yelling death threats, and Ang's poor breakfast is ruined. Renee is like an amped up zombie when Drita goes to placate her. Alicia is appalled by all the behavior surrounding her. Renee comes back to the group, and Renee keeps promising to beat down Natalie while Drita runs interference. No one tells her that she's going to run away from a fight. Natalie starts popping off at the mouth in the form of an apology, and Alicia holds back Renee yet again. Ang questions whether Renee can understand that Natalie is trying to apologize. Renee accepts her apology, and Natalie makes a comment that she isn't Renee's puppet. That comment causes Renee to pounce. I swear I saw Drita about to burst out laughing. After Renee is taken away, Drita, Ang, and Alicia are in awe of Natalie's ability to stand up to Renee. 

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Natalie calls her boyfriend to rehash the events, and he finds the commentary hilarious, as do I. Renee apparently has bad breath. Natalie apparently needs to learn how to button her shirt because the girls are super close to coming out to play…as is her who-ha. Adult onesies will never be in style, ladies! Later the sane ones (aka Ang, Drita, and Alicia) reconvene at the pool. Drita is so confused how this didn't happen in a drunken club mess. It was breakfast for goodness sake! Alicia is so befuddled. Screw it, let's drink bowls full of liquor cream! Drita decides that they should divide and conquer. She goes to find Natalie while the others search out Renee.

Ang timidly enters Renee's room to find her totally passed out. She shares this news with Alicia and they decide she needs her sleep. They know her relapse is playing a huge role in her behavior even though they don't condone it. They finally change the subject to talk about something more uplifting–Alicia and her husband's sentencing. As a felon, Ang can totally relate. Man, I love Ang. This lifestyle isn't for everyone, that's for sure! As long as Ang keeps chain smoking her clove cigarettes, I think everything will be right with the world. 

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At the bar, Drita catches up with Natalie. I am so proud of Drita for playing peacemaker! Drita explains that Renee wasn't prepared for Natalie to stick up for herself. Natalie realizes that Renee went from mentor to mental. Slow clap for that statement! Drita respects Natalie's side of events and she is proud that Natalie can be the bigger person and let things with Renee be water under the bridge. When Sleeping Beauty awakes the next day, Renee recognizes that she wasn't herself due to the pills and alcohol. Ang isn't onboard with the fact that Renee is still spewing anger, but she's happy Renee is willing to go out sans Natalie. The ladies head to an interactive mob museum in hopes of spending some sober quality time with Renee. Note to self, next time I'm in Vegas I totally need to go to this museum. Renee's friends are happy to see her back to normal. In the midst of the fun, Renee brings up the Natalie debacle. Drita calmly tries to defend Natalie, and Renee is beginning to feel like her friend is not one hundred percent on her side. Again, I am so proud of the new Drita. I'm even prouder of her when she returns to the casino alone to try to win back her money. Bitch is smoking a cigar and losing more money! Amazing. 

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With Renee in bed, the ladies can now lounge pool side with Natalie. As Ang says, "One in, one out." While the women are sitting around, Renee calls Natalie and invites her up to the room to talk about their problems. Natalie declines because she isn't ready. The girls are proud of Renee for reaching out, and they urge Natalie to make amends. Natalie starts to channel her inner Renee, and I'm not surprised that Renee once thought Natalie was her mini-me. I think Drita and Ang are starting to doubt their appreciation for Natalie. That night, Ang and Drita are still playing referee, and Renee is getting more and more livid that Natalie rebuffed her attempts to talk things over. This is only going to get uglier.


[Photo Credit: VH1]