What the hell, VH1? Were you trying to start a total riot among the Mob Wives on last night’s reunion? Before the final sit-down can begin, the producers decide to show unseen footage from the last six seasons in order to rile up all the women.
Karen Gravano is so enraged that I can barely make out a single word coming out of her mouth due to all the bleeping. Carla Facciolo finds Drita D’avanzo’s outtakes to be “sad lies,” and Renee Graziano questions whether she appears as angry on on-screen as Drita. Yes, she does. Drita opines about how the show was supposed to be about a great group of friends and women empowering women. Um, she knew this was going to be aired on VH1, right?
The set is staged as if the women are back at the warehouse meeting that Big Ang called earlier this season. Karen and Renee are first to be seated and they remember their initial animosity in the early seasons. I think it has something to do with rats and mobsters, but I can’t be sure. At least they’re cool now though, right?
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At this point, we learn that the final sit-down was filmed two weeks prior to Ang’s death, and it’s dedicated to her memory. I am sure she’s thrilled with how her friends are acting. Geez. Ang arrives with her trademark giant smile and we’re treated to her casting video where she waxes poetic about wise guys. Karen touts Ang as changing the dynamic of the group by coming in as the peacemaker. Amen to that. When Ang’s beef with Renee is highlighted (her only fight ever on the show), Renee tells Ang that Drita instigated the entire situation.
Back at the holding area, producers encourage Drita to watch the unseen footage as well as the live feed of what the ladies are saying in the warehouse. She refuses, saying she just wants to see Karen face-to-face…with no security. Carla is next to join the crew, and the women discuss the season two drama when Renee‘s husband Junior turned state’s evidence on her father. Karen finds it silly that they are recalling things that seem so petty when Ang is fighting for her life. You think? Ang hugs her cohorts and leaves.
The producers then inform the women that Drita is now listening to everything they are saying while she’s getting ready. Let’s talk about the recent fights, okay? As Karen goes off, Drita fumes and storms off to find the women. Drita threatens the camera crew as everyone scurries around. Why do they seem so shocked that Drita is on a rampage?
Without further ado, Drita is escorted to the warehouse, and true to her word, she’s not sitting down with her former friends. She goes in swinging after Karen. Why did she bother with hair and make-up? Carla isn’t able to get out of the way in time. As usual, the ladies are pulled apart. Drita is being physically restrained, but Karen stands in the corner laughing and taunting. Renee is confused…she thought they were actually going to be talking civilly. When Drita starts in on Karen’s ex, Karen loses it and is carried off repeating the “p” word over and over. When did it become okay to say that word on television unless it was in a cat litter commercial?
Drita calms down as Karen watches from behind the scenes. Carla accuses Drita of belittling her and basically calling her a sidekick, but Drita denies it. Drita promises she will keep her cool around Karen as long as Karen refrains from talking about her husband. Renee reminds Drita that they all talked smack about each other and their families, and Drita denies it. She’s faced with never aired footage of her trashing Karen’s dad, and she threatens to leave. Perhaps Drita should have taken a gander at what the producers tried to show her while she prepared to fight. The tiny producer comes in with his stern parent voice and informs the ladies that they are going to stay seated and have a conversation. Karen returns, but she doesn’t need to be escorted in because everyone is going to remain calm. He’s like the cray whisperer.
The producer coordinates security with the camera angles before Karen saunters up to the table. Drita asks why Karen is so furious, and Karen states–yet again–that Drita was bad-mouthing her father and saying Karen shouldn’t be on the show when she returned in the fifth season. Drita demands to know who is filling Karen’s head with such nonsense. Seriously? How many times does it need to be spelled out for Drita? It’s captured on camera! Drita changes her story to say that she didn’t mind Karen being on the show–she just didn’t want to film with her because Karen has a nasty habit of bringing men into the women’s drama. As quickly as their conversation started, it ends with Drita complaining about it being too cold in the warehouse. Tiny producer agrees. They are going to blast the heat for a few minutes, bring in newbie Marissa Jade for a soundbite, and call it a day. I am so confused.
The newbies are introduced at the tail-end of this “reunion.” Marissa is there to clarify who was mouthing off about the men. Marissa assures Drita that Karen never spoke ill of Lee, but she still refuses to say who started the rumor. Renee believes that Drita jumped to conclusions about Karen due to their volatile history. Drita concedes that may be the case, and she and Karen agree that their relationship is irreparable, but they can be in the same room without trying to murder the other. Brittany Fogarty struts in, late to the game, and Renee explains the rules of the sit-down. Each lady is being permitted to calmly say her peace about her co-stars. Oh, is that what’s happening? Brittany accuses Renee of judging her unfairly because her father was considered a rat. Renee agrees, but it is what it is, and she’s trying to change. As Renee yells, it’s clear that they didn’t blast the heat for long enough. The women’s furs are on-and-off-on-and-off, much like these chicks’ friendships. As Brittany and Marissa start to squabble, the producer interrupts. Can the newbies just talk about their brief time on the show so he can call it a day?
Marissa cracks jokes about how angry this group of women can be and Brittany asks them not to kill each other after the newbies’ exit. Is everyone actually laughing? When the original four are left, the women discuss the biggest fight of the season, Ang’s battle with cancer. They decide to put their differences aside to make sure that Ang knows they are there to support her. And just like that, I’m in tears yet again.
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[Photo Credit: VH1]