Southern Charm New Orleans is already far and away more entertaining than its Savannah counterpart. It’s got meltdowns, it’s got marriage drama, it’s got second line…and it’s got hella abs and very attractive, albeit messy, people. Isn’t that the recipe for great reality television? Last night’s episode is no exception. Jon Moody’s painting party is being blown to bits by Tamica Lee and Reagan Charleston. Justin Reese is thrilled he isn’t a husband yet. Tamica is screaming at Jon, Reagan is screaming at Jeff Charleston and Jeff is trying to defend the party in its purest form. It was just for painting! Tamica ushers out husband Barry Smith who calmly tells her she is behaving irrationally. She insists her beef isn’t with him, it’s with the host and asks how he would feel if the tables were turned. I’m guessing he wouldn’t mind if his wife was at a party where he wasn’t in attendance, but he keeps his mouth shut because he’s clearly not stupid…unlike the Charlestons.
The drunk duo is trading slurred insults. Reagan is pissed that Jeff never answered her calls, but he swears he didn’t have any missed calls to her because of poor service. Check his call log for Pete’s sake! Realizing he’d left his phone and his jacket at Jon’s the pair turns around to retrieve it. Reagan swears she’s simply concerned because her husband never drinks this much, and she worries he’s been hit too many time in the head due to his stint in the NFL. She also warns him not to get the wet paint from his attempt at nudes all over his nice jacket. What a stupid painting. The Picasso of NoLa is insulted. He’s hanging the masterpiece in their bedroom. As if! Reagan slams the painting into her husband, coating his jacket. She whines a nasally apology while promising to clean it. Jeff counters that she’s never cleaned anything in her life, and I believe him. He’ll be the one cleaning his jacket. She works and puts him down, and it’s sad. He screams that he isn’t the wounded concussion bird that she wants him to be. He’s just upset because his wife is being a giant beatch.
Jeff storms out of the car and runs into the night. Reagan warns that he will be arrested, but he doesn’t care. In the other Uber, Tamica and Barry’s conversation has turned to their friends’ tumultuous marriage. Barry is worried about Jeff. On cue, a hysterical Reagan phones Tamica to share her husband has run away. They reroute the Uber and Barry is hesitant to follow Jeff’s path through a construction site. He knows that when people trespass, the property owners usually shoot first and ask questions later. A melodramatic Reagan sobs that she doesn’t want her husband’s selfishness to endanger Barry. I think Barry’s decision to chase Jeff into the swamp is based solely on not wanting to listen to Reagan’s shrieking. Catching up to Jeff, Barry tries to talk some sense into his friend. Jeff repeats that he just can’t do it anymore.
Finally, Tamica makes sure that Reagan gets home safely while Barry makes a second attempt to wrangle Jeff who is hellbent on walking the seventy miles back to his house. I’m sure he’ll be fine walking over that bridge. It’s only twenty-five miles, after all. Jeff is distraught, and he pours his heart out to Barry. He doesn’t know what is wrong, but he’s not himself. He finally allows Barry to take him back to his wife’s downtown apartment. The following morning, Barry fills in Justin on how terrifying the experience was. Reagan heads to the French Quarter where she finds Jeff asleep on the floor in part of his suit. He apologized for being a disheveled mess as she snarks he looks like a busted Chippendales dancer. Jeff is overly apologetic–he is under so much stress, but he realizes that doesn’t excuse his actions. Reagan is tearful. They are a team, but she’s concerned that half the team is suffering from some massive brain swelling.
Kelsey and Justin live together, and she’s excited to remodel their home. She’s disappointed to learn they will be potentially displaced for several months during construction. Justin treads lightly when mentioning his mom is fine if they move in with her. Kelsey isn’t exactly thrilled at this option. She won’t be able to go braless in booty shorts; however, Kelsey promises Justin she’ll consider it. She promises they can discuss it later. Meanwhile, Reagan heads to bestie’s house for wine and cookies. Tamica feeds Reagan cookie dough and wine as she doesn’t know how to technically bake. Reagan wonders aloud if she’s making a mountain out of a mole hill with Jeff’s behavior, but Tamica assures her friend that Jeff needs help. Across town, Jeff heads to Barry’s gym to apologize and express his gratitude. He’s scared and worried about himself, and he wants to get help. Jeff recognizes he’s been isolating himself, and he is ready to work on himself. Reagan asks Tamica’s advice. How did Tamica handle her separation from Barry. Tamica admits that she was suffering from postpartum and accusing Barry of infidelity. When they were poised to file for divorce, they realized they needed to work on their marriage for their kids. Reagan reminds Tamica that there are no children to anchor her relationship with Jeff. She loves him, but she’s not sure she is strong enough to work with him when she could easily walk away. Tamica is starting to realize why Reagan wanted the French Quarter condo. Just like Jeff the night before, Reagan is running away from her marriage.
Barry is meeting his friend and Tamica’s arch nemesis Gian for lunch. Gian is very business savvy, so Tamica doesn’t fault Barry for seeking Gian’s advice. She also realizes that her husband flirts a bit with his clients, but it’s part of being a trainer. He’s seeking Gian’s guidance on starting a line of active wear, and Gian is happy to stroke his ego…and his arm. Speaking of business development, Jeff is trying to mend fences with Reagan by going all in with her jewelry line. When he left the NFL, he pursued his MBA so he could partner with Reagan in business. She’s the creative side, but he’s her Swiss army knife, tackling everything from quality control to shipping and receiving. I may have another job title for Jeff, but it’s really sweet (and kind of sad) to see how much he adores his wife. Jeff is working with a clothier and his friends to prepare suit forms for an upcoming launch party. Justin praises his friend’s eye for detail. Jon cites Reagan as the car, but Jeff is the engine that gets everything done.
The evening of the launch party, Jeff is excited to have a lot to do as a distraction. Jon arrives shirtless, and I can’t even count the amount of abs this guy has! The rest of the gang arrives with Tamica channeling a sexy nutcracker. Jon and Reagan’s beef is water on the bridge thanks to Jon modeling her wares. The party ramps up with a traditional Mardi Gras band. A fellow NFL wife arrives so Reagan can revisit the hellish night. Her friend Rachel relates. Her husband has a problem following a grocery list. Concussions, y’all. On the balcony, Tamica is giving Justin a hard time about his relationship with Kelsey. She doesn’t think Justin wants to marry Kelsey, and Justin thinks Tamica needs to mind her own damn business. They haven’t even been together for a year. Tamica just doesn’t see the pair working in the long term, and Kelsey interrupts before Justin can defend himself.
Tamica is quick to tell Kelsey that they are chatting about the status of their relationship, and she’s worried about her friend Justin. Justin intercedes that he maintains they are happy and moving at their own pace. Kelsey seems fine with this answer until Tamica interjects that Justin doesn’t think Kelsey is The One. Kelsey seems hurt, and Justin attempts to explain himself, although he won’t really give a definitive answer as to whether she is The One. Tamica points out his inability to form the words yet again. Reagan wanders up on this shiz show, and she informs her friend that she needs to save this drama for another evening. Tamica argues she is just asking the right questions, but Reagan counters that she is making her guests uncomfortable. Both Justin and Kelsey admit to feeling uncomfortable, so Reagan puts an end to the conversation as Tamica storms back into the party. She finds Jeff and starts complaining about Reagan before being pulled away by Jon. Jon tries to school her on the etiquette of finding out one’s husband has been invited to a guys’ night that included a group of ladies. Is she insecure? That’s a hot button word for Tamica. Barry is watching his wife hold his own as Jon tries to peace out gracefully. One of Jon’s friends yells “Insecure” in Tamica’s direction before following Jon, and Barry follows him out screaming some very not nice things. He threatens Jon’s friend who is threatening a law suit. Jon and Tamica try to calm him.
TELL US – WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE? SHOULD JEFF SEE A DOCTOR REGARDING HIS RECENT BEHAVIOR OR IS HE JUST STRESSED?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]