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Last night’s Love & Hip Hop Atlanta was every bit the scripted guilty pleasure that it always is.

Joseline and Erica meet to discuss their fight.  Joseline apologizes for accusing Erica of sleeping with Stevie J.  Erica refuses to accept said apology and goes off on how she doesn’t like Joseline.  For once–and I am shocked to type this–Joseline is the bigger person and walks away from the conversation when she realizes there is no changing Erica’s mind.

Mimi Faust is packing up Stevie J’s belongings.  While she loves him, she just can’t stay with a man who is unfaithful.  I’m pretty sure she isn’t just learning this, but whatevs.  Ariane comes over to check on her friend, and she’s shocked that Mimi is actually biting the bullet.  Mimi reveals that she’s still very sad, and she would love for their relationship to work.  Basically, Mimi’s bottom line is Stevie is welcome back if he stops screwing with Joseline.  Clearly she doesn’t really care if he’s faithful, she just doesn’t want him to be unfaithful with the likes of Joseline.  Baby steps, I guess.

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Momma Dee comes to visit Lil Scrappy who is recovering from an asthma attack.  He reveals to his mom that Erica was drunk and passed out when he couldn’t get his inhaler to work properly.  When is finally able to wake her, she’s on the phone with work and headed out the door.  Huh?  She calls someone to take him to the hospital, and he is suffering from pressure in his head.  Momma Dee says it was probably all of the oxygen rushing to his head.  I am so glad she’s not a doctor!  She thinks her son needs to make some decisions.  Erica should never have left his side.  Scrappy seriously needs subtitles.  Bed-ridden Scrappy may benefit from a full-on voice over.

K. Michelle wants to treat Mimi to a girls’ day to see how she is doing.  Over pedicures, K. Michelle assures Mimi that Stevie will come over to pick up his stuff and use it as an excuse to grovel.  Mimi reveals that she’s been getting threatening texts from Joseline who is mad that Stevie is trying to reconcile with Mimi.  Please, I beg of you dear readers, tell me what is so great about Stevie!  What am I missing?  Moving on from Joseline, K. Michelle tells Mimi that Karlie has been stirring up drama.  In fact, if it wasn’t for Karlie running her mouth about Joseline sleeping with Stevie, Mimi may still be happily in the dark.  She even had the gall to tell K. Michelle’s producer he was working with the wrong artist.  K. Michelle wants Mimi to set up a meeting between herself and Karlie, and she can’t promise she won’t go crazy on her.  Mimi is happy to oblige.  These women are so backwards.

Shay comes over to visit Scrappy.  I can’t figure out if he’s a step up or a step down from Flava Flav.  Maybe she’s making a lateral move.  He wants to know if Shay thinks Erica should have been more present at the hospital.  Shay just wants Scrappy to stop worrying about his ex…he should be fine since she was there taking care of him.  It’s official.  Shay and Scrappy are definitely out of the friend zone.

Karlie is meeting with Stevie about the prospect of working together.  He isn’t really on board about working with the girl who ratted him out to Mimi, but he is very interested in working with her management Cash Money.  The two make a pact to leave the drama in the past, Stevie asks Karlie to perform.  Um, she’s no K. Michelle in the voice department, that’s for sure!  Joseline enters stage left (literally!) as Karlie completes her song (rap?  spoken word performance?).  What is Joseline wearing?  Joseline can’t get over what a bad dancer Karlie is.  Stevie wants the women to collaborate, and Joseline is not having it.  She isn’t willing to work with Karlie, and Stevie wants her to put her emotions in check and act like a professional…relatively speaking, of course.  Joseline is in tears and her accent is kicking big time as she cries to Stevie about how she really doesn’t want to work with Karlie and she’s only willing to do it because of how much she cares for him.

Proving yet again just how totally and completely not scripted this show is, Karlie leaves the studio chatting on the phone about her wonderful meeting with Stevie.  She is approached by a stranger in the parking lot, and while she doesn’t appear to know who he is, she is very excited to make his acquaintance.  Said lurker introduces himself as Benzino, the owner of Hip Hop Weekly.  She realizes she’s seen him on stage with Stevie before, and he professes how beautiful she is.  Within fifteen seconds of conversation, they determine that they are both single (I guess Antonio Reid was just a rung on the ladder, Karlie?  Or was he just free to film that one episode, VH1?) and have quite the connection.  He asks her out and climbs into his car.  This show is giving me an migraine!

Momma Dee invites Erica over to find out why she abandoned Scrappy in his time of need.  At least Scrappy comes by his need for subtitles honestly.  The women are yelling over one another, but I do catch “Who gonna check me boo” and I hope Sheree Whitfield had the common sense to trademark that phrase.  The next thing I know, Momma Dee is accusing Erica of leaving her son for dead.  Dramatic much?  Erica meets Scrappy for lunch, and he reveals that he’s done with Erica after leaving him.  He finds her too detached and unemotional.  We learn that it wasn’t Erica who was drunk pre-asthma attack, it was Scrappy.  My bad!  They both look very intellectual in their glasses, but they are cussing and arguing up a storm until Scrappy stomps away.  I really do like his glasses though!

Mimi finds out where Stevie has been staying and decides to pay him a visit to drop off his stuff.  He wants them to get on the same page because he still loves her.  He’s really, really sorry he got Joseline pregnant, but he’s not going to stop working with her.  He smiles while Mimi goes off, and he explains to her that he’d like for the two of them to go somewhere that she can’t be yelling so he can get his point across.  A therapist perhaps?  Mimi jumps on this offer (smart cookie!), and something tells me that Stevie has shot himself in the foot with this suggestion.  She reveals that Joseline has been threatening her, and Stevie goes in for a kiss.  He’s got some cajones, doesn’t he?  Mimi retaliates by driving over his stuff on the way out of the driveway.

Rasheeda, K. Michelle, and Erica meet up at a local park where they sit on some random chairs.  Erica wants Rasheeda’s thoughts on their relationship given that she is such good friends with Scrappy.  She wonders why he’s being so hot and cold.  Rasheeda wishes she could help, but she has no clue why Scrappy is acting like he is.  K. Michelle wants to know if Erica thinks there could be another woman.  Of course not!

Mimi is having cocktails with K. Michelle.  The pair is waiting on Karlie so they can set the record straight.  Karlie and K. Michelle automatically start hurling insults.  Mimi watches with a smug smile as Karlie shakes the table to the point where Mimi loses her drink.  I notice that none of the several patrons in the near background are paying these women any attention.  VH1, you need to step up your game in the extras department!  K. Michelle smacks at Karlie who gets up from the table.  VH1 handlers quickly intervene, and K. Michelle goes to the ladies’ room to cool down.  It’s not working.  Karlie is crying because she’s sad that she isn’t able to beat up on K. Michelle.  Mimi tries to explain that K. Michelle thought Karlie was being inappropriate at some of her functions.  Karlie won’t hear it.

Next week, K. Michelle and Karlie face off once again, but Karlie has a great date with Benzino to take her mind off of things.  Stevie J reveals to Benzino that every once in a while he still likes to take a dip in the Joseline pool.  He’s so classy.  Joseline and Mimi meet to discuss how they are both being played by Stevie.  Erica considers letting Scrappy slack off on child support, and Rasheeda’s professional career threatens to come between her and husband Kirk Frost.

WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE?  ARE YOU TEAM KARLIE OR TEAM K. MICHELLE?

[Photo Credit: VH1]

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