Vanderpump Rules

Tom 2

Well the wedding of Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney is going along full-force like the tornado in the Wizard Of Oz. Except instead of being transported to the land of yellow brick roads and ruby slippers, Tom 2 is being chased by the Wicked Witch of the West and her flying monkeys. Oh love in the wilds of Vanderpump Rules.

Am I the only person LOVING Tequila Tom?! For all my hatred of Tequila Katie, Tequila Tom needs to stick around a little more! He has bottled the worms of his rage up for too long. Let those suckers crawl OUT.

Peter Madrigal said it when he compared his failed relationship to Stassi Schroeder as like oil and water. “It may look OK when you shake it up…” but in reality it is two disparate things that simply do not stay together in the long term. And that is Tom and Katie. They are the fling that never ends – although it should’ve 200 drunken fights ago. And at this point it doesn’t even look good together anymore. No, anymore it looks like a torn, shredded dress and a slept-in smokey eye.

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katie-more-rage

To say that this has been a rough year for Katie Maloney on Vanderpump Rules would be a major understatement. Not only is she at the center of most of the drama this season, but she is also really feeling the heat from the Pump Rules fandom on social media. Now Katie is defending herself against the haters and justifying her actions by giving the viewers some insight on her conflicts with Scheana Marie Shay, Ariana Madix, and LaLa Kent.

Hopefully Katie has some reasonable explanations for her behavior this season, but I guess that’s up for you to decide. I was all for Katie “finding her voice” and moving away from being portrayed as Stassi Schroeder’s sidekick, but now it’s hard to know how I feel- not that I actually know these people or have any role in this friend group. Needless to say, Katie’s latest interview is interesting.

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Vanderpump-Rules-Reunion-Seating-Chart

Without even seeing one preview for the Vanderpump Rules reunion, I can already get a feel for where they’ll be going with the arguments questions whenever it airs and that’s because the reunion seating chart was posted on the Bravo website. Sure, everyone does have to sit somewhere, but you can really tell which story lines are being prioritized and who is on which side based on the seating chart.

One thing that stands out to me is that LaLa Kent doesn’t have a spot on the chart, but that wasn’t super surprising since she just peaced out from the show without saying a word and has been shitting on the show and its cast ever since. However, pics of her from Scheana Marie Shay’s Snapchat posts show she was present- so I guess that was a surprise to Andy Cohen as well?

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Ariana Madix

Ariana Madix is just one of the guys. Well, sometimes. After this week’s Vanderpump Rules episode found Ariana not just part of Tom Schwartz‘s bachelor party, but the lone dude, she’s speaking out about gender stereotypes and defending herself against accusations that she tries too hard to roll with the homies.

Ariana is offended by the criticisms, tweeting, “When some1 makes fun of me saying I try to be a dude or ‘cool,’ it hurts bc my ex always said I was not ‘girly’ enough. U be you, I’ll be me. k?”

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Tom Schwartz and Tom Sandoval

It is awkward watching these Vanderpump Rules episodes leading up to Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney’s wedding since their own friends are constantly trashing their relationship and questioning their decision to be husband and wife. I cannot even imagine how Tom and Katie feel watching it or even how their friends feel after saying what they have said – especially since Katie and Tom did actually end up getting married.

Tom Schwartz and Tom Sandoval opened up about that, as well as the gay speculation about them, the combined bachelor/bachelorette party antics in New Orleans, a stalker fan named Brian, and more, on the Daily Dish podcast.

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Scheana Marie Shay and Robert Valletta

As a person who’s way too into Vanderpump Rules, I wish the episodes would speed up and be more in line with what the cast is up to in real time. Last week, we saw Scheana Marie and Mike Shay celebrate their two year wedding anniversary and it felt strange to watch since they are not together anymore. There’s still no sign of a breakup this season, so it feels like we are really behind. Especially since Scheana has been talking about her secret boyfriend in interviews and on social media.

If you follow her on Snap you have probably seen a male limb in the corner of her stories and wondered who she was dating. If you watch Scheana’s recent appearance on Watch What Happens Live, you might even remember that Andy Cohen remarked that he met Scheana’s man before the show and that he was tall. Well now, the mystery is solved. Scheana’s mystery man has been revealed.

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kristen-doute-wendi-mclendon-covey

Last night’s guests on Watch What Happens Live were The Goldbergs star Wendi McLendon-Covey and Vanderpump Rules cast member Kristen Doute.  They covered everything from whether Kristen will be invited to Ariana and Tom‘s wedding to why she inserts herself in everyone’s business.

Andy Cohen plays a clip of Tom Sandoval crying on last night’s episode and says that it always makes him cry to see Tom cry. Kristen asks, “Because you are laughing so hard?”

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Tom 2 in drag

On last night’s Vanderpump Rules poor Tom Schwartz saw the writing on the wall and it said “RUN!” First off, how stupid was the witch hunt over Tom’s two years in the past drunken Vegas hook-up and then Kristen Doute‘s insistence that this is the justified reason Katie Maloney is constantly mean and angry.

I fully agree with Tom Sandoval – that’s ridiculous, and Tom 2 is a “battered wife.” Now I feel more sad watching this. More sad-sad, even, because the only way Tom can tap into his own inner rage and express his feelings is while wearing a dress. Or being tortured by reptiles. When Tom 1 and Jax Taylor are the lone sane members of your collective friend group, things are not going swimmingly.

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