Last week was the premiere of Kandi's Wedding, while we were all hopeful Mama Joyce had undergone a lobotomy, personality transplant and a change of heart, she did not have time to visit the wizard on her days off and was, alas, completely unchanged!
This week she continued her crusade against Todd Tucker, accusing his mother of being a "hoe" and his deceased father a "pimp". WhileKandi Burrusswas also dealing with that incident, her bridesmaid, best friend, and past Mama Joyce victim Carmon quit in the midst of planning the Coming To America themed wedding. Needless to say, it was a bad week!
In her Bravo blog, Kandi discusses Mama Joyce's mouth and behavior and where things stand with Carmon now.
Full disclosure: I set out to loathe Southern Charm. I anticipated watching like one would a train wreck. In the beginning, I did, but then something strange happened. It was as if the Who's Who of WhoovilleCharleston various towns throughout my great state were able to change this Grinch. At first I couldn't stand the thought of Thomas Ravenel, having once watched him make out at the table next to me in some oyster bar years ago. Then, strangely, I began to feel sorry for him, as he clearly just wanted to find love and a proper Senator's wife. Finally, he grew on me, much like a wart or some other weird skin abnormality, but grew on me nonetheless. I honestly think he's going to be an amazing dad.
That said, I guess I'm going to have to start following politics, because T-Rav isn't planning on any more Bravo stints. Instead, he's hoping to revamp his political career with the hopes that people will remember his time on Southern Charm more than they do the time he served in prison. T-Rav certainly has a colorful past, doesn't he? He's like a modern day Ernest Hemingway without the works of literary genius.
I just want to get out of the way that Aviva Drescher's father George is disgusting. Now Ramona Singer is no slouch when it comes to inappropriate comments and unfathomable rudeness, but at least Pinot mostly restricts her mouth to inserting her pinot-soaked foot in it and spilling out gaffes of astonishing social ineptitude. George, on the other hand, takes it to the level of grotesque and I am frankly insulted that Bravo expected viewers to enjoy that.
In the midst of George and Ramona's argument last night on Real Housewives of New York, she was matched level-for-level with him in trashy, inappropriate comments, although Ramona's comments are as inappropriately lewd in terms of insulting rudeness as George's are in insulting sexual harassment. I'm not going to really repeat what was said save for the fact that if I were Ramona I'd be contacting the EEOC about harassment in the workplace! Yuck and yuck and more yuck!
It would have been nice if one of these two self-righteous hubris-obsessed blowhards could have taken the highroad instead of mutually sinking to an abhorrent level, but alas… not gonna happen right? In other news Sonja Morgangot drunk – send a press release!
And this is why I put little to no stock in what celebrities have to say about politics. Sure, they love to talk (and talkandtalkandtalkandtalk) about whatever candidate best fits their personal agenda or is en vogue with the A-listers of Hollywood, but do most of them even have a clue? At best, the extent of Kim Kardashian's political knowledge comes from School House Rock, at worst…well, this is pretty bad.
The reality star was shunned by the Obama campaign, and the President himself once referred to her now husbandKanye West as a "jackass." Classic Barack. Now, Kim is diving head first into local politics, backing California's 33rd District Congressional Candidate Marianne Williamson. So what has Kim contributed to the campaign? Money? Of course not! But she did write a boastful blog about a recent press event with Marianne.
Know what the ladies of Love & Hip Hop Atlanta need more than anything? If you guessed English lessons, that's a close second. These girls need to take a seat. Calm down. Pop a chill pill. Geez, they are so busy going after one another and looking the other way as their partners' eyes (and other body parts) wander, they never take the time to relax.
After the craziness on this week's episode between Tammy Rivera and Joseline Hernandez, Tammy is speaking out about her beef with the Puerto Rican Princess. While Tammy seems to be trying to create a non-existent storyline (I guess she didn't get the memo that the show is scripted, so Mona will happily write her one!), she does have some valid points about Joseline's shenanigans!
It seems like Joe Giudice should just resign himself to spending a looooong, looooong time behind bars! Besides awaiting sentencing for his federal fraud case, Joe still has not settled his case in New Jersey for identity fraud! Aaaaahhh…. the felonious Fraudices.
NorthJersey.com reports that Joe spent his day in his home away from home on Monday – a NJ courtroom – for a "status hearing" as he and lawyers attempted to iron out a last-minute plea bargain. Joe has a pre-trial date set for July 14.
I have many fond memories of Alfred E. Neuman, as I'm sure all of you do, but this upcoming August issue of Mad Magazine is going to be the be-all-end-all in Mad madness. Not only are they spoofing the reality wedding of the century with a cover that recently debuted on Access Hollywood Live, but Reality Tea has the hilarious exclusive on an inside feature: Reality TV Rejection Letters.
The Bachelor rejection letter spoof starts off – "After a thorough background check that included talking to your former employers and ex-boyfriends and researching your criminal record, we came to the conclusion that you were simply too well-adjusted for "The Bachelor: Season 18." Nice try – but there's crazy and then there's "Bachelor" crazy. What we're looking for is someone who – cries hysterically at diaper commercials, sews bridesmaid dresses for her cats…"
I can't wait to read the rest of these! Although, I'd buy the issue just so I can put that Kimye cover on my office wall!