On last night’s episode of The Rachel Zoe Project, Rachel and Rodger had some human emotions as Baby Skyler is introduced to the world. It was shocking. And Nice. Keep up the good work guys!

Things start out with Mandana and Joey freaking out about Jeremiah’s firing. Mandana just doesn’t understand why Jers is so upset – I mean he wasn’t fired for incompetence, just for being too talented for the job at hand. Oh and for having dirty nails while touching couture gowns. Joey gets that Jeremiah has the sads and to make-up for it advocates throwing a “sorry for your loss” party.

Mandana grabs coffee with Jeremiah and her eyes glaze over as her “friend” tries to talk to her about how he is feeling post Zoe-pocalypse. She’s just like move on, it’s no big, you had a good attitude – can we talk about ME now? And indeed, Mandana keeps referencing Company Zoe with words like “I” and “Our” Brand. Is it Mandana’s brand or Rachel’s? She who does the most work does not always reap the most reward. But with employees like this it’s no wonder that Rachel feared maternity leave – I also found it ironic that Mandana managed to make a few Brad and Tay jabs while basically announcing she was staging a coup!


Rodger arrives at the office and issues the memorandum: Rachel is on maternity leave – effective immediately – says him and isn’t to know about any work issues. There is some confusion about what Rachel is to pack for the hospital. Joey isn’t sure if Rachel is giving birth IN Chanel or TO Chanel. Joey is so much funnier away from Rachel!

Rodger mentioned a heat wave, but why is everyone wearing jackets if it is so hot? I guess once the fall collections are out everyone must slavishly don them regardless of accordant weather.

Rachel is packing her hospital bag filled to the brim with ridiculous. Is she serious? 6-inch heels and Halston? Joey breaks it down: no doctor is going to allow you to push a baby out of your vag in thighhighs – plus you don’t want to ruin them! Glamorous as you want to be, it’s not happening!

That scene was so ridiculous I wanted to pull Rachel aside and let her know: “People are laughing AT you, not with you.” Rachel’s primary concern is working in a Chanel duster and some bronzer for the post birth. Since she doesn’t own the recommended loose and comfy clothes she is going to bring several multi-thousand dollar knit wear pieces. She doesn’t even have some cashmere leggings? Rachel does cop to birth anxiety and would prefer to stay prego forever than actually birth a child.

Rachel calls Joey with a last-minute styling job to dress and decorate Molly Simms. In New York. Tomorrow. Basically, what I am understanding, is that Rachel would have flown to NYC to put Molly in ONE dress for a gallery opening? They haven’t heard of email with photo attachments and snail mailing a dress?

Joey goes over the options with Jordan, Molly wants something 60’s. Apparently Joey already does Molly’s hair on the regular so he is comfortable with dressing her. Joey heads to Starworks to pull anything and everything with glitter. He is so Rachel’s gay.

Rodger calls Rachel to give he the exciting news: he hired a videographer to tape the birth! Rachel likens it to filming Rodger’s colonoscopy, as in NOT HAPPENING. She gets furious, freaks out, cusses at him, tells him no, and slams down the phone. Yeah, I’m with Rachel no one needs to see that.

After being effectively shut down, Rodger decides to wheedle his way back in to Rachel’s good graces by getting her a push present. Oh, a push present – does anyone get those in real life? I made my husband get me some Reebok Easytones following birth, it was no Neil Lane diamond but I probably wore them a lot more! Anyways, Rodger takes out a second mortgage and blows through their unborn child’s college fund to purchase some enormous rock under the pretense that Rachel will love it forever and not try to trade it in for something better next year. That Neil is some salesman – I’m sending my hubs over there tomorrow!

Joey is freaking out over fitting Molly since it is his first time going at it alone and he is kinda in over his head. The ever-charming Mandana does little to reassure him and makes him more upset when she badgers him for details. In fairness to her, it was important.

In New York we meet Joey’s brother, Elie, who is funny! Joey describes Elie as his confidante and the person he bitches to the most about Rachel. Elie hates pretty much everything Joey pulls, which is a coincidence because so does Molly!

Joey has a humble moment when he admits styling people is nerve-wracking and it’s a little bizarre to be, like, responsible for their fashion life. What if Rachel hates what he puts Molly in? Luckily Rachel is distracted with that whole birthing thing.

When Molly shows up, she surprisingly has a lot of body issues and is sort of a nervous wreck and doesn’t want to wear anything Joey pulled except for the dress Elie dubbed Bea Arthur’s tunic. It was pretty hideous. Eventually he shoves her in the disco mumu and puts her hair in a pony and kicks her out. Later he takes a photo for Rachel and she loves it because Joey is her own personal god.

Rachel’s water has broken! So she starts doing her hair and Rodg grabs the video camera while she grabs the hairspray. Priorities! At the office Marissa and this new assistant Kendall (has she been here all along?) are in a panic about completing the nursery in one day. They decide they MUST call for reinforcement – oh, how about Jeremiah! Since he has nothing to do now that he is jobless he’ll do all the dirty work! He is so starting a RZ home line for next season. The things we do for low-grade fame!

In the car on the way to buy baby clothes and sheets, Kendall talks about seeing Rodger at the hospital and how exciting and normal he was. Kendall seems way too real for this show like Jordan, which is probably why they are never featured! Everyone is genuinely excited for the arrival of baby Zoe-Berman and the girls go ga-ga in the babystore.

At Rachel’s poor Jerrs is fretting about setting up a crib bumper – those things are so annoying, I concur! Then he looks through Rachel’s collection of All Saints baby clothes with envy and jealousy. The girls drop off the goods, sign for the mattress, and take off to deliver coffee and the push present to The Rodg who is CrackBerrying everyone he knows.

And then meet baby Skyler!! What a cutie! Rodger is shocked that birth was nothing like the movies. Why am I not surprised? The Zoes are thrilled and totally awestruck by their son. This was a great side of the most vapid people on television since AbFab. Congratulations you two!