Love & Hip Hop Atlanta Recap: Oh Baby!

Last night’s Love & Hip Hop Atlanta may have been more ridiculous than the premiere…if that is even possible.

After last week’s drama, Mimi Faust is recapping her feelings about K. Michelle’s birthday party with her good friend Ariane.  Ariane tries to talk some sense into her friend, but Mimi is just upset because Stevie tells her that she is his world.  Um, well, someone else was his world last night!  Ariane questions Mimi’s next step, but Mimi just can’t make such a big decision right now.  Gracious.

Rasheeda talks about her family with Kirk Frost.  After working with some major labels, she is much happier being a part of an independent label with her husband as her manager.  Together, they try to figure out her next single.  Kirk knows that she has the talent to go far, even if he’s more her sucker than her husband or business partner.  He wants the pair to be able to balance work and marriage.  Kirk is tired of having Rasheeda bring work issues into the bedroom.

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Karlie goes to talk to Stevie J, but she’s met by gatekeeper Joseline.  Karlie explains her back story regarding the club night to Joseline.  Karlie questions if they have more than a business relationship.  Joseline is adamant that while she’s been with Stevie for several years, it’s a purely professional situation.  Karlie knows Joseline is lying, but she chooses to bite her tongue.

Mimi isn’t answering Stevie’s calls, and while he knows he may have been a little messy at the party, she is his number one priority.  He ambushes her at work, and Stevie lays it on thick.  Mimi questions why Joseline would throw a drink on him if they aren’t invested emotionally.  When she asks Stevie point blank if he’s sleeping with Joseline, he (of course) denies it…although his smirk tells another story.  He is the worst liar ever.  When Mimi doesn’t buy into his BS, he tries another tactic.  He wants to give her part of his business.  A couple percent–you know, the big bucks.  Mimi counters with ten percent.  She knows that he’s been with Joseline.  He lays on the charm, and she is very bad at deflecting his advances.  Let’s get some self-esteem, friend!

Rasheeda and Kirk are cruising around as she plays what she hopes will be her next single.  He doesn’t look convinced.  She wants a legitimately produced video.  Kirk is in agreement if Rasheeda will give her all.  She takes offense to him implying that she sometimes does things halfway.

Erica has reconnected with her mother after ten years.  Her mother questions whether Scrappy is a boy or a man and wonders if Erica is only with Scrappy because he’s her baby’s father.  Erica’s mom wants her to realize that she can have whatever she wants.  While her mom isn’t dissing Scrappy, she hopes that Erica isn’t trying to force the family unit that she was deprived of due to her mom’s incarceration.  The pair share a very emotional exchange, and while her mother had horrible issues with drugs, she never stopped loving her daughter.

Mimi appreciates how nice Stevie is being after blatantly ditching her to go “record” with Joseline, but she’s seen this behavior before.  Over dinner she presents him with a “surprise.”  It’s a contract granting her twenty percent of his business.  Stevie looks like he could split nails as he questions who drew up the document.  He may be willing to offer Mimi ten percent, but he knows he’ll be able to make her forget her demands altogether if he compliments her smile and sings her a love song.  Really, Mimi?  I think Stevie is actually having Joseline record this cheesiness for her new album.  Awkward?

At a video shoot, Kirk is upset with Rasheeda for showing up for two hours late.  She isn’t going to take his attitude when he cut the stylist budget and now she has to do two jobs.  This is precisely why husbands and wives rarely work together.  After a quick cry, Rasheeda is ready to film.

Karlie invites Mimi over to catch up…it’s been a long time since they used to be thick as thieves in Los Angeles.  Karlie quickly apologizes for outing Stevie’s “alleged” relationship with Joseline, as she would have never intentionally hurt Mimi.  She had no idea they were together.  Of course, Karlie doesn’t change her opinion.  Who calls their manager “daddy” and rubs up on him like a stripper pole?  Mimi wants to know if Karlie thinks beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is sleeping with Joseline.  Um, duh.  Karlie then switches gears and says that she’d still really like to work with Stevie.  The nerve!  Mimi thinks she has some guts to call out her man for cheating but yet still want to record with him.  Karlie relays to Mimi how Joseline acts like she is the boss of Stevie, not the other way around.  Mimi laughs…she is the boss of both of them, as she gets ten percent of whatever Joseline does from now until her career is over.  Hmmm…I guess she didn’t feel like fighting for that extra ten percent after she was lucky enough to get a 30 second love song.  Mimi would love t0 find new artists for her “partnership” with Stevie.  They two toast tea mugs to their deal.

Stevie and Joseline are working in the studio.  Did you know that she loves Stevie?  She tells Stevie that her period is almost a month late–about three weeks, to be exact.  Which is it, Stevie wants to know…three weeks or a month?  As you all know, three weeks is 21 days, while a month is thirty?  How late, but definitely not pregnant, is she?  He is over this conversation.  Period.  I swear wine just came out of my nose.  Oh Stevie, if there was a period, you certainly wouldn’t be having this conversation.  Shockingly, Mimi interrupts this discussion to introduce herself to Joseline as not only Stevie’s long-time girlfriend but Joseline’s new boss.  She tells Stevie that she wants him to work with Karlie.  Stevie and Joseline both think Karlie is a rat.  Well, Joseline’s vote doesn’t count, and Stevie’s doesn’t either if he knows what is good for him.  If Mimi were a dog she would have just successfully marked her territory in every corner of that studio.  You go, girl!

Scrappy heads to Erica’s for some downtime.  He reveals that he isn’t living nearly as large as he was when his hit first was released.  Erica wants Scrappy to learn how to not let his work feelings affect their relationships.  Scrappy wants to move into a new place so she won’t be nagging him all the time.  Erica is actually fine living apart as long as Scrappy is honest about his intentions.

Joseline has big plans to give Karlie a reality check  She needs some subtitles.  Joseline relays to Karlie that she will be allowed to work with Stevie J when Joseline permits her to work with Stevie J.  This is too ridiculous for words.  I hope Mimi and her ten percent straighten her out real soon.  Oh.  Oh no.  Oh no VH1.  You didn’t.  You did.  I am now forced to watch a very dramatic scene set to R&B where Joseline takes a town car with tinted windows to the studio where we get to watch her enter a bathroom, squat, pee and cry as she executes a pregnancy test.  Is nothing sacred, VH1?  I think we viewers are smart enough to put things together had you, oh, I don’t know, shown Joseline go into the bathroom with a pregnancy test and exit in tears.  You’d be shocked at our deduction skills.

A mute Joseline takes the urine coated stick to Stevie.  Happy Father’s Day!  As she cries, he informs her that she needs to take care of things.  They can find a solution.  Why would she bring the pregnancy test to her manager?  These things she needs to handle outside of their now clearly only professional realm.  He has photo shoots lined up for her…she can’t be puking up a storm at those due to morning sickness.  He wants to know whose baby it is?  Really?  Joseline doesn’t want to tell him, but she finally admits that he is the only one who could be the father.

Next week, Joseline threatens to take half of Stevie’s fortune, and Scrappy gets angry when Stevie talks smack to EricaMimi tries to put Joseline in her place, and she refuses to believe it’s Stevie’s child.  How stupid are these women?

WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE?  HOW MUCH OF THIS SHOW DO YOU THINK IS SCRIPTED?

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