On this week’s episode of Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles, the Altman brothers have picked up where they left off last week – in disagreement over the unfinished Hollywood Hills house. Matt is upset that Josh is still showing the property when he already has a buyer ready to make an offer. Josh reluctantly agrees to give his brother’s creepy client, Sam, twenty-four uninterrupted hours to close the deal.
Josh Flagg and Colton meet with business partner, Sabrina, to discuss their personal investment property, Marcheeta. This property is named after its location on one of the ‘bird’ streets in Beverly Hills. A highly desirable area where all the streets are named after different birds. Josh tells them that he has a premonition to sell. Since there is a lot of new construction going on in the area, they should get out while they are ahead. Sabrina and Colton are a little emotional having put in two years of sweat equity, but agree to sell once they hear that they will double their initial investment. Cha-ching!
James Harris and David Parnes have made an amazing discovery – they found Venice Beach! These late to the party British explorers are now singing its praises. Venice is in demand! Venice is up and coming! Venice is quirky! They meet with their new client, Joanna, who is looking to downsize. She wants to know if James and David are brothers. Apparently, they get this question a lot and it annoys them. As if! After touring the 3400 sq. ft. modern home with a lovely Zen garden, James rambles on about how Venice reminds them of the Notting Hill area back in the motherland. He gives Joanna the two minute elevator speech on their success here in the States. She mentions that she had seen their website and was impressed enough to hire them. I’m not sure I follow her logic as I can see on their site that Faring is still on the market! Shouldn’t they have sold that already, being such amazing agents and all?! Oh never mind. The Brits are confident to list Joanna’s home at $2.595m even though the property is located in the less desirable area ‘East of Lincoln’ Boulevard.
Josh Flagg has now started private showings of the Marcheeta investment property. He meets with an Australian woman with plans to turn it into a ‘wellness center’. Josh’s eyes glaze over as she describes the new age-y concept. She goes on to call the place a tear-down, or in her country what is called a ‘sh*t box’! Josh agrees ‘it is a sh*t box’. I really don’t think Josh gives a sh*t what it’s called. He just wants to sell the damn place, make a nice profit, and have a dirty martini to celebrate.
James and David are now canvassing Venice Beach and neighboring Marina del Rey area with flyers for their brokers open house, much to the chagrin of the local agents. The sight of them running around in their banker suits is hysterical. When in Rome guys, when in Rome. The listing price of their property raises more than one agent’s eyebrows as does its ‘East of Lincoln’ address. One suggests lowering the price. Another agent gives James a parting gift – a doggie poop bag! I’m not sure if the irony was lost on him or not, but he says that David would love the poop bag as he has two basset hounds at home.
Josh and Heather finally make time for their wedding planners, Sara and Ricardo. These two lovebirds are clearly not on the same page when asked the most basic of questions. The wedding planner’s jaws drop to the floor upon learning that no date has been set, they have not booked a venue and Heather does not have a dress! Heather also wants an intimate affair and Josh does not. It gets uncomfortable for everyone when Josh gets up to take a call from Matt, who has been blowing up his email inbox with news about the Hollywood Hills home. Matt’s client, Sam, has come in with a lowball offer of $9m. Two million below asking. Matt is adamant that his client is buying the property. And Josh is adamant that he will not sell at that price for his client. The Altman brothers find themselves at another impasse. And business trumps wedding planning once again. Not surprising.
The day of James and David’s open house has arrived. Only no brokers are showing up. Finally, a few agents straggle in. They mention the big elephant in the room – the price. It is too high for this particular area in Venice. However, if anyone can sell at the asking price, it’s them. Nice compliment guys, but you know that aint gonna happen unless the Brits take your advice and lower the price. And that is exactly what they do. James and David call Joanna to discuss the new strategy, which they say will bring in more offers and get it back up to the original asking price. She says she trusts their experience and is on board at lowering to $2.295m.
Josh Flagg continues to show Marcheeta and meets with agents Sam and Ryan Serhant (from MDLNY). Ryan throws out a lowball offer of $3.5m. While both guys put on their best game faces, Josh knows that he is in the driver’s seat in these negotiations. He does not have to sell and Ryan would not have flown all the way across country if he did not want to make a deal. Meanwhile, Josh Altman stops by to check out the property. He has several upcoming listings in the area and is concerned how the sale will affect the comps. Josh F. mentions that Sam and Ryan have upped their offer to $4m. Josh A. asks that he get them up to $5m, but Josh F. is confident where he is priced. A talking head pissing contest ensues between the two Joshes as to who is the better broker. Oy.
Back at the office, Josh meets with Matt and his client, Sam, who brings along his two sons for their Bravo debut. I think this was a part of the deal that was non-negotiable. Josh opens negotiations and counters their offer at $10.5m, to which scary Sam replies ‘you just wiped my smile off my face’. Since when does this guy smile?? He reminds me of the villain in the James Bond movie, Moonraker. I would not want to run into him in a dark alley, that’s for sure. Matt wants to speed up the negotiations for his client, but he is getting resistance from his brother. Josh admits to a little sibling rivalry with his older brother, but then finally comes around. They agree to $9.9m and a short close. Everybody is happy. That is, until Matt lets little brother know that he was authorized to go higher.
Josh Flagg and his grandmother, Edith, meet up for their weekly dinner at La Dolce Vita. How aptly named and bittersweet. Edith is looking elegant as always with her elephant ball sized pearls wrapped around her neck. She tells Josh that that she doesn’t drink, doesn’t smoke and does nothing against law. Josh asks ‘How about sex?’ He tells her that she looks sexy and should have a boyfriend. Edith doesn’t want one. She wants to be free. Free from having to answer questions like ‘what are you doing?’ and ‘where are you going? She was one smart lady! Btw, did you happen to catch Josh on WWHL this week? All the boys from LA were on the show and Andy Cohen brought Josh to tears at the mention of his grandmother. It also seemed like Andy was trying to fix him up with the guest bartender. Both awkward and insensitive. I hope that there is not trouble in paradise with him and Colton??!!!
Josh Flagg is eating again. This time at his favorite pizza joint with agents Sam and Ryan. Ryan is headed back to New York and would like to strike a deal on Marcheeta. Josh has done his research and knows that the client has been overpaying for properties, who I’m sure will be happy to hear that!! The boys put on their big boy panties faster than usual and agree to close at $4.35m. Josh’s premonition has come to fruition, netting them (him, Sabrina and Colton) a cool $2m+ profit. Cha-ching!
James and David host their new and improved brokers open at the new list price. They serve tea and crumpets. Well really just iced tea and English muffins. It’s obvious that they do not know this market at all! When in Rome guys, when in Rome. This time around there is a lot more action. The price reduction is a hit. They now have three offers on the table. The highest one being $100k under original asking. I had my doubts, but way to go boys! They meet up with Joanna for lunch to tell her the good news. She has brought along her friend, Robert, who we find out is also her fiancé. When did this happen? She never said anything about a fiancé when she mentioned downsizing??!! Apparently, things have changed rather quickly since their initial meeting. Joanna is not only getting married to Robert, but he is also moving in with her. In her ‘East of Lincoln’ home! She thanks them, but will no longer be needing their services. James and David look completely shell-shocked after all their hard work and nearly getting the asking price has gone down the tubes. Once reality has set in, they all toast to the engaged couple. Then Robert mistakenly toasts the Brits as a couple as well. The boys lightheartedly respond that they can list his home now that he is moving in with Joanna. Only in California folks, only in California.
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Recap Author: Maura
Photo Credit: Bravo