Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap: The Ladies Say ‘F*ck Cancer’

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap
Photo by: Jeff Daly/Bravo via Getty Images

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 has arrived, and the confrontations are beginning to pile up in “A Night at the Opera.” Tensions continued rising between Alexia, Marysol, and Adriana after the sprinter van incident last week. Meanwhile, Guerdy has found out that Larsa spilled her cancer diagnosis to the rest of the Housewives. It seems all good intentions are done away with on RHOM Season 6, Episode 5.

The “real” injuries of Miami

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap
Photo by: Stephanie Diani/Bravo

Speaking of good intentions being met with unfortunate fates, Marysol and Kiki both ended up with some tough injuries after playing in Larsa’s charity basketball game. Of course, one of those injuries looked a bit more legitimate than the other.

While Marysol said she was “self-diagnosing” with a sling over her arm, Kiki’s ankle was noticeably swollen. At least Marysol showed some self-awareness when saying, “The brain is always broken.” The two recapped the previous week for a moment, Marysol griping about Adriana’s flatulence once again. (Apparently, Marysol can excuse “f*ck,” but “fart” is where she draws the line).

Regarding the other Housewives, Kiki said Nicole was the first to call her and ask if she was all right. On the other hand, Kiki expected some communication from Larsa but received none. Kiki admitted that she felt she was losing her best friend to Marcus Jordan.

Nicole, Alexia, and their beaus get cooking

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap
Photo by: Alexander Tamargo/Bravo

Elsewhere, Alexia and Todd hosted a little double date for themselves, Nicole, and Anthony. The four partook in a cooking lesson, making pizza together. They discussed Todd’s apology that he left to Anthony – a nine-minute-long apology, combined with a delivery of flowers, chocolates, and a card.

Anthony admitted that he thought the apology was initially fake, his secretary laughing as she delivered it to him. Of course, they all took it in stride, and Anthony said there were “no hard feelings.” The conversation then moved to Julia’s upcoming “F*ck Cancer” party. Alexia admitted that she didn’t like the fact that the party would be at Adriana’s house.

Adriana offended Alexia when she suggested Alexia wanted Todd for his money. Nicole admitted confusion to the cameras since Alexia, Todd, and Adriana had different narratives surrounding the “Nuevos Horizontes” party, and Todd’s absence. “The truth usually lies somewhere in the middle,” Nicole said.

Familial anguish for Larsa and Adriana

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap
Photo by: Jeff Daly/Bravo

Larsa and Marcus started their podcast, much to the annoyance of their audio engineer. On the podcast and with the cameras, they discussed how each of their families had warmed up to the relationship. Granted, when a producer asked Larsa if she had seen Michael Jordan at Thanksgiving, Larsa replied flatly, “I just don’t wanna talk about him.”

On the other side of Miami, Adriana prepared herself to undergo her first ketamine treatment, and Julia graciously agreed to drive her there. While on the way, Julia gave Marysol a ring to invite her to the “F*ck Cancer” party. Marysol initially seemed on board, but when Julia mentioned it was at Adriana’s house, Marysol said she’d have a medical procedure she’d be recuperating from. Adriana said it was “bullsh*t,” and called Julia “gullible.”

Eventually, they arrived at Adriana’s treatment. Things started a bit silly, and Julia was convinced she’d never try ketamine. But as the minutes went on, Adriana began seeing her brother and father, who passed away. “I love you. I should’ve gone first,” she said. She and Julia sobbed as Julia took her hand. Adriana spoke again. “I never got to say goodbye.” The treatment guide said Julia could seek peace now that she’d tapped into her loss.

Larsa questions the truth of Guerdy’s diagnosis

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap
Photo by: Jeff Daly/Bravo

Later that night, Lisa and Jody attended an F1 Racing party with Larsa, Marcus, and Kiki. However, Kiki quickly noted that she was the fifth wheel. “I miss hanging out with my friend, Marcus,” she said. Larsa, on the other hand, told cameras she was past wanting to just hang out with her friends. Kiki said she struggled to find men she wanted to date.

As the night progressed, Lisa told her friends how she tried to speak with Guerdy about her breast cancer diagnosis. When Lisa and Guerdy spoke, Guerdy initially pretended not to know what Lisa was talking about. As Lisa pushed it, Guerdy knew immediately who told Lisa about the diagnosis, saying, “I tested someone because I knew they couldn’t keep their mouth shut.”

When Lisa reported on this, Larsa said, “I don’t have time for tests. She needs to grow up.” At that point, Larsa began to question the validity of Guerdy’s diagnosis, specifically because Guerdy was drinking, which Larsa supposed Guerdy ought not to do if she did have cancer.

Getting ready to f*ck cancer

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap
Photo by: Jeff Daly/Bravo

As everyone prepared for the “F*ck Cancer” party, Guerdy spoke with her husband about how overwhelming it was for everyone to know, revealing she turned her phone off. Guerdy voiced her frustrations with Larsa as Russell tried to calm her. Guerdy promised she’d be classy while at the party.

Julia showed her stress on her face as she readied her performance space. She’d practiced so long, and the night had finally arrived. She practiced once more, acknowledging the challenge considering she’d never sung in her life. From there, guests began arriving.

Guerdy was happy to arrive at the party, saying it gave her a great deal of hope that Martina had beaten two cancers. Alexia arrived shortly thereafter, having called and texted earlier that day. Once together at the party, Alexia admitted that she’d already known previously about the diagnosis.

Larsa has arrived, and Guerdy’s not happy

Real Housewives of Miami Season 6, Episode 5 Recap
Photo by: Jeff Daly/Bravo

Guerdy wasn’t surprised, but still didn’t take it well, saying Larsa needed to “be corrected.” She told Alexia that Guerdy’s confession to Larsa was given in confidence. Things got worse when Nicole arrived. Nicole revealed that Larsa called her, asking if Guerdy’s troubles were “real.” Guerdy remarked on the hypocrisy in saying Guerdy had cancer only to backpedal and question if she did, in fact, have cancer.

Martina soon arrived with her dog, greeted by nearly all the Housewives. The cast remarked that Lisa was notably absent. They noted that an article had come out recently, where Lenny accused Lisa and Jody of planting a recording device in his car. At the very least, Alexia and Adriana managed to behave around each other.

Larsa soon arrived, and the tone immediately shifted. They continued on the topic of Lisa, but Guerdy interrupted and said, “Not now with the gossip, guys.” When Larsa asked, “What?” Guerdy responded, “I’m not talking to you.” As the girls all raised a glass, Guerdy also pointed out how her doctor approved drinking.

From there, Larsa called Lisa, only to find out that the police were at her house.

Real Housewives of Miami continues Wednesdays at 9/8c on Bravo.