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Below Deck

Kate Chastain Below Deck

Last night’s Below Deck was brought to you by booze and the patriarchy, which, as history has shown us time and time again, is a terrible combination. Luckily we had Rhylee Gerber to be a good counterbalance! Well, kinda.

After a short easy charter of moms wanting to relive their glory days chasing Captain Lee The Grateful Dead, Captain Lee rewards the crew with a mid-season skip day. Usually this means binge drinking at a touristy resort, but Thailand’s added bonus means they get to spend an additional afternoon off at an elephant sanctuary. 

Kate Chastain Below Deck

Who would have ever thought that Kate Chastain was actually capable of upsetting Captain Lee Rosbach? Hell has frozen over on tonight’s Below Deck episode. Kate irks almost every crew member and the captain himself. She takes forever to get ready for a pool day during the cast’s day off. Who takes that long to put on a bikini and sunglasses? At least Kate has Rhylee Gerber on her side, even though she’s loathed by most of the crew members and probably isn’t the best ally.

After a crew night out, Brian de Saint Pern tells Kate that he feels the term “yachtie” is disrespectful. He nicely asks her not to describe him with that word, but Kate didn’t seem to care and kept saying it anyway. This prompted Brian to tell Kate that she’s “kind of a bitch.”

Below Deck Captain Lee Rosbach 

How did Simone Mashile get hired for Season 8 of Below Deck? She doesn’t bring much in terms of storyline and she’s incapable of doing her job as Second Stew. She can’t make iced coffee, open a wine bottle, cut a fruit, or carry dishes to the table. For some reason, her “service” abilities are completely lacking. And, no, I’m not referencing her (alleged) lack of reciprocity during that post-vomit hookup with Tanner Sterback.

Obviously, Simone isn’t qualified for the Second Stew role. To be honest, I don’t even think she should be Third Stew. It’s so funny how so many viewers misjudged Third Stew Courtney Skippon’s love for luxury and just assumed she would have zero work ethic. Meanwhile, Courtney is actually good at her job. Who would have thought?

Below Deck Captain Lee Rosbach

The Simone Mashile and Tanner Sterback hookup on Below Deck last week brings to mind lowered expectations and the smell of stale vomit.  It was out of left field that Tanner would pursue Simone since previously said that he was wary of crushes.  Perhaps after Chief Stew Kate Chastain turned him down, Tanner chose to act on the only willing participant in close proximity.

Interestingly, this hookup completely overshadowed the fact that Courtney Skippon and Brian de Saint Pern’s relationship has progressed to sharing a bunk for the night. But, Brian is not one to kiss and tell so it’s a complete non-story.  In contrast, Tanner has no bones about sharing the details of his physical encounter with Simone.

Rhylee Gerber Below deck

Rhylee Gerber showed up when the Below Deck crew needed her. Abbi Murphy split after her text message engagement. Tanner Sterback was coming off of an illness. Brian de Saint Pern was in bed resting after his leg injury and subsequent infection.

They needed Rhylee on deck, even though Ashton Pienaar, Captain Lee Rosbach, and Kevin Dobson didn’t care for her presence. Yes, Rhylee rubs them the wrong way, but she actually does her job, unlike Simone Mashile, for instance. Simone can’t even make an iced coffee. The crew had to be so grateful that Rhylee showed up when the team was crumbling, right? Apparently not, according to Rhylee, Captain Lee did not give Rhylee a portion of the tip from that charter.

Simone Mashile Tanner Sterback Below Deck

Below Deck cast member Tanner Sterback seemed to have zero interest in Simone Mashile when he found out she had a crush on him. His exact response was a long pause followed by “Ah, that’s dangerous.” However, he had no chance with Kate Chastain, so he moved on to his next option. After many drinks, cigarettes, and a puke session, Tanner decided to give Simone a chance and he eloquently told her, “You wanna sit down and then I’ll hook up with you?” And at that moment, it was on.

They made out at the bar, “cuddled” in a bunk bed on the Valor. And, the next day, Tanner told everyone he “went down on Simone last night.” So is that all that happened between the yachties?

Below Deck Star Tanner Sterback Has A Girlfriend

Right from the beginning of this Below Deck season, Tanner Sterback had the hots for Kate Chastain. She was not at-all-interested in him, but Simone Mashile was crushing on him. Hard. During Monday’s episode, Tanner followed his session of binge drinking and chain-smoking with a puke and rally and a make-out session with Simone. This led to some bunk bed sleepovers.

Spoiler alert: Tanner and Simone’s relationship did not stand the test of time, despite its gross romantic start.

Kate Chastine Simone Mashille

Below Deck viewers have seen Simone Mashile struggle to cut fruit, open a wine bottle, make two-ingredient drinks, and carry plates. Yet, somehow, she secured the role of Second Stew. She has been miffed with Kate Chastain for not putting her on service as often as she’s been in the laundry room. However, Simone seems to have zero service skills. Even one of the (obnoxiously drunk) charter guests from last night’s episode carried out plates better than Simone ever has. This set Simone off. As sad as it was to see her crying in her room, I cannot help siding with Kate. Courtney Skippon is a way more competent stew than Simone is. Of course, she is getting more service opportunities.

Kate has been so patient and so nice to Simone all season, even though Simone seems to lack all most of the skills needed for this job. Still, no one could blame her for putting Simone in her place when Simone “confronted” her during last night’s episode. Yes, I know this show is edited and it is possible that all of the footage of Simone coming through as stewardess is on the cutting room floor. However, that just doesn’t seem likely.