Since Lynn Curtin’s daughter was served eviction papers on season three of Real Housewives of Orange County, who even owns their home on these shows has been a topic of conversation. On RHOC particularly, these women seem to exist on one of two extremes – they’re like Heather Dubrow and Shannon Beador (circa her first season) and have homes that could be described as compounds. Then there are the Lydia McLaughlin’s who rent.
This season is no different. Newbie, Elizabeth Lyn Vargas has a huge beach-front mansion that gives Shannon pangs of jealousy and nostalgia for days past. Then there’s the ridiculous feud about who called Gina Kirschenheiter’s townhome “sad.” Braunwyn Windham-Burke has admitted she wanted to hurt Gina with that comment. Now she’s clarifying why she doesn’t actually own the new McMansion she’s been filming in.
For a filler episode, this week’s Real Housewives of Orange County was quite the roller coaster, wasn’t it? There was a heartwarming high. There were low-budget lows. And then right at the end, was the lowest low of all. Personally, over the course of the episode I went from getting choked up. To being weirded out. To being completely shocked, emotionally triggered and happily surprised at the return of a familiar face. And finally, to feeling physically sick to my stomach by the final scene. For a Housewives season many fans are choosing not to watch, this year in the OC is certainly delivering all kinds of emotions so far. And we haven’t even reached the earth-shattering outbreak of a global pandemic!
Let’s just start with the low-budget low, shall we? The episode kicks off with Emily Simpson FaceTiming Gina Kirschenheiter to rehash last week’s drama. Which would be a totally ordinary thing to do in the world of Housewives if Gina weren’t busy shopping at…Walmart. Now listen. I’m not saying shopping at Walmart is sad and depressing the way some ‘Wives might. But it’s normal. Which is precisely what I don’t want from a Housewives show. Give me luxury! Give me wealth! At the very least, give me Trader Joe’s. I mean. Can you imagine Heather Dubrow deigning to shop at Walmart during her five seasons on the show? I didn’t think so. Gina getting caught shopping at Walmart on camera just goes to show how far this show has fallen from its glory days.
Real Housewives of Orange County star Kelly Dodd has been busy offending people near and far with her tone-deaf comments about the coronavirus pandemic and the Black Lives Matter movement. In May of 2020, Kelly commented on the Covid-19 pandemic by comparing it to “the flu.” Kelly stated on Instagram, “Well, people are going to die! I’m sorry to tell ya.” Her comments just boggle my mind.
Back in April, Kelly again took to Instagram to inform the world that coronavirus is “God’s way of thinning the herd!” Dr. Dodd once again apologized, but the damage was done.
Welcome back to week three of The Real Housewives of Orange County! Now before we go down the rabbit hole to discuss Shannon Beador‘s revamped food line, Kelly Dodd‘s latest tone deaf behavior or whatever hair nightmare Gina Kirschenheiter will inflict upon us this week, I realize I failed to analyze one very important element of any new Housewives season last week: taglines! Since I started with episode 2, I didn’t think much about it. But in retrospect, Bravo supplanted the taglines in the reveal with Jeana Keough‘s epic Desperate Housewives-inspired intro. So let’s dive into the Season 15 taglines shall we?
For starters, they’re pretty atrocious. I mean, right? Like, all together they might be the weakest batch in RHOC history. Possibly in all of Housewives history. And that’s saying something for a show that started out with Vicki Gunvalson crying, “I don’t wanna get old” way back in Season 1. Kelly telling viewers not to judge her? After everything she’s been doing and saying in the wake of a global pandemic? That’s rich. (And don’t even get me started on that “Drunk Wives Matter” moment.) Braunwyn Windham-Burke‘s makes more sense in the context of her alcoholism than it did before the season premiered, while Shannnon‘s “closed Beador” probably would’ve been more effective if she’d used it back in Season 13 right after her split.
Hello Real Housewives of Orange County fans! We’re two weeks into the seismic change that is this year in the OC and I’m pleased to announce that I’ll be recapping the lives of the First Ladies of Bravo for the remainder of Season 15! I’m an OG RHOC fan — I’ve been watching since Season 1, Episode 1. That was all the way back in 2005 when I’d sneak Bravo on the TV in my parents’ room, daydreaming about life behind the tony gates of Coto de Caza. Well, that and crushing hard on Shane Keough while stressing about whether Lauri Waring Peterson would ever live the OC lifestyle again. Of course, none of the women currently on the show were even a twinkle in Andy Cohen‘s eye at that point. And to be frank, I had my fair share of reservations going into the season because of that.
Could RHOC survive without Vicki Gunvalson? What about Tamra Judge? As a resident Housewives expert, I’ve always been an ardent believer that each city in the franchise needs an OG to act as anchor to the show’s history. So no matter how many ‘Wives came and went through Bravo’s revolving door, there would always be someone who’d been there from the very beginning. And whether I loved or hated them in any given season, I truly expected to watch Vicki and Tamra whooping it up in a retirement community thirty years from now for Season 45.
Tamra Judge has been talking about whether or not she would return to Real Housewives of Orange County on every single platform possible, as if she actually made the choice not to be on the show. They only offered a three-episode stint and she didn’t take it.
She did not “decide” to quit the show. They didn’t want her to have a full-time role or even a part-time role for the whole season, so Tamra talking about the conditions that would have to be in place for her to “decide” to return is just a total joke.
Can I get an inflatable tube man dance and a wooooowwieeee!?! BAM! There’s some glitter in your face for good measure. Apparently, Lydia McLaughlin and her mother Judy Stirling from Real Housewives of Orange County are baaaAAAaack. Lydia was a total one season wonder…but TWICE. In season 8 Lydia boasted about her connection with her lord, Jesus. Meanwhile, her mom grappled with quitting “the pot” and keeping her feet off Vicki Gunvalson’s couch. In season 12 Lydia gave this show temporary new life when she rolled in looking like Charlie Chaplin. You know the scene. Never forget. I don’t even remember her mom in season 12. Must have been riveting.
Tamra Judge has even admitted she doesn’t think these recent seasons of RHOC have been their best. Can’t say I disagree. I miss the drama from Gretchen Rossi, Alexis Bellino, and even Heather Dubrow. Call me crazy, but the TV was good. Lydia, on the other hand, already misses Vicki on her screen. Well with taste like that…
It’s been years since Heather Dubrow has graced our screens on Real Housewives of Orange County. Truth be told, I didn’t love her on the show, but now I really miss her. I miss how she stayed on the outskirts of most of the drama but always managed to be a part of it anyway. I miss her blatant self-absorption over the building of her mega-mansion. Hell, I even miss her telling Shannon Beador, “We’re done, please leave.” It wasn’t her best moment, but it was one of her brightest.
While she has made appearances on husband Terry Dubrow’s hit show, Botched, she’s (mostly) quiet. Unbothered if you will. Ok, so there was an assistant scandal thrown in there. Rich people problems, ammirite? And well, they did catch major heat for selling overpriced hand sanitizer during a pandemic. Not cool. But she’s trying to focus on other things, like casting for a new series with Terry. When other former housewives cling to their past glory, Heather stays in her lane.