It’s getting to be that time again! We can stop watching reruns and fillers, because soon our favorite reality shows, along with a few new train wrecks will be premiering. VH1 has just released the premiere dates of three of its programs.
T.I. and Tiny: The Family Hustle will be returning on Monday, September 3rd at 9PM ET. We’ll follow Tip (who may be the busiest dude in the world) as he continues to star in the Starz series “Boss” and prepares to film the movie “Identity Theft” with Jason Bateman and Melissa McCarthy. As if that’s not enough, he’ll be promoting his new book and releasing his ninth album…all while filming his family’s reality show.
Sometimes I watch these shows and I have no idea what happens. It’s just a passive aggressive cluster eff of pinot slurring, sloshing, and rambling. On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New York it was just one big Poopy the Pig moment after another.
So where shall we begin? Ahhh… the bellows of an UES town home situmatated next to a parking garage. No bueno. In the belly of the beast sits Sonja T. Morgan, wearing the merest blush of pink, sipping her water and preparing to be wowed by the business savvy of Heather Thomson and her Yummy Tummy brand expert.
There is also a surprise guest: Pinot Singer, sporting what I can only describe as an outfit straight from Gianni Versace’s 1992 collection. Oh, that blouse with that belt. Please – save this woman from both her pinot and her dated wardrobe.
So yeah, Heather and her brand people arrive and it’s head-butting and butt-head acting and sniping and waffling and furtive glares and Ramona holding court like she’s Sonja’s bodyguard. She’s interrupting and speaking over people and acting like people take her seriously. All of Heather’s team was just eying her warily and mentally assessing that based on this shenanigan Sonja’s toaster oven was going to burn.
Last week on Bachelor Pad, Reid Rosenthal tried to convince the ladies to eliminate Ed Swiderski. Even though Sarah Newlon just hooked up with Ed, she went with the plan. Then she immediately went to Ed to apologize for voting against him. Unfortunate for Reid, Jamie Otis chose to keep a drunken Ed around Bachelor Pad, probably for the entertainment value, so Reid’s plan failed.
Ed, possibly the most unscrupulous member of the cast, questions why he’s on Bachelor Pad. “The game is all about influence, perception, and flat out lying,” Ed says. “I don’t like lying.” I’ll give you a second to digest that statement and meet you after the jump.
America’s least successful matchmaking show has spawned another walk down the aisle! Although these two smarties have never tried to meet the love of their life under the glare of reality TV cameras. Oh, no – they found each other BEHIND the reality TV cameras. Two Bachelorette producers tied the knot this weekend with Chris Harrison officiating the ceremony. Awwww…
Cassie Lambert and Pete Scalettar said “I Do!” in Malibu under the guidance of Chris (who probably made sure they gave each other the final rose) and it was a full-on reunion as the guest list was filled with former show contestants.
“It might be a new job for me,” Chris joked with People Magazine. “They asked me in Prague this season when we were there if I would do it for them. … I love them to death and I’ve seen then grow as a couple and I love them as a couple and as individuals.”
Oh, Love & Hip Hop Atlanta! You rose to a new high last night…or did you sink to a new low? It’s so very hard to tell!
Stevie J. and Mimi Faust take their precious daughter to the park. I initially think that Mimi is overwhelmed with Stevie’s attempt at family time, but Mimi doesn’t trust him as far as she can throw him. I’d say “good for her” but I doubt this will last long. Stevie proposes that he, Mimi, and Joseline all go to counseling together. What? He has some major cajones. Of course, he could sell milk to a cow, and he has Mimi considering the session.
Quick question…how can you tell when people just want to live their lives in the reality television spotlight? Apparently the answer lies within VH1’s show Couples Therapy. It seems to be the show that has-been reality couples go to revive their careers (how’s that working out, Guard and ProtectKasey Kahl?). Even the couples who are adamant about their strong unions seem so seek out the “self-help” show when they fall off the reality radar.
Case in point? Silex. Alex McCord and Simon Van Kempen were attached at the hip for their seasons on Real Housewives of New York. The goo-goo-ga-ga couple often bragged about their intense connection and spending minimal time apart. In fact, the couple spent a ridiculous amount of time looking down their noses at their counterparts for not having as strong a union as they shared…maybe by “union” I mean wardrobe…
It’s that time again! Reality Tea’s Booze ‘N Books Club! With zillions of reality stars – and new ones popping up every second – and each one with something to sell, we here at Reality Tea decided to test out some of these fetes of literary greatness. And what goes better with books that are badly written than cocktails? So we thought we’d try something fun and review some of these gems!
Each month Reality Tea will be reviewing both a book and a cocktail. Last month we reviewedReal Housewives of Orange County star Vicki Gunvalson’s book More Than A Housewife: Talent! Purpose! Direction! Drive! along with her Wines By Wives club, her joint venture with Tamra Barney.
August was all about the Housewives of Atlanta – Kim Zociak, Nene Leakes and Cynthia Bailey. We gave Mary a month off from ‘testing’, as we don’t want to pay for her rehab nor be forced to co-author her memoir “Will Blog For Booze” and since I love me some cheap wine moscato, I took one for the team!