Big Ang Recap: Birthday Bonanza!

It was a Big Ang birthday last night!  Ang planned a surprise shindig for her sister Janine, but both she and pal Linda celebrate their big days during the same week.

Linda comes to visit Ang’s chest at the Drunken Monkey.  Anthony arrives with his new motorcycle.  Linda manages to make sitting on a motorcycle pornographic.  Of course she does.  Ang is terrified at the thought of riding a motorcycle…something tells me that is foreshadowing.  Later, Ang has her friends over to enjoy some bubbly and a very dirty pool.  Kilo is breathing all over Lil’ Jen.  Ang hates shoveling leaves out of the water, and she decides she’s going to get herself a pool boy for her birthday.  He can fill her champagne glass, massage her head, and fetch her towels.  No mention of cleaning the pool though…

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE!

Ang talks to the girls about throwing a surprise party for JanineJen and Linda think it will be difficult to get one past Detective Janine.  She knows everything.  Ang decides to enlist Janine’s husband Dominick for help with the event.  The pair plots to surprise Janine, but it’s Janine who surprises them when she appears in the kitchen.  Dominick and Ang do not have poker faces.  I am surprised to learn that in four years of marriage, Neil has never gotten Ang one birthday present.

Ang invites Janine over to help her interview pool boys.  While they are harassing young men, Dominick will be sneaking all of the party necessities into his house for Janine’s surprise.  The first guy is a bit scared by all of Ang’s request, and maintains that he’s strictly a pool professional.  The second guy is from the same company, but he’s willing to take $200 a day to play the role of cabana boy.  Next!  Interviewee number three compares Ang to his grandmother, so he’s out as well.  Fourth time is the charm!  For only $7 an hour, he makes a mean sangria and will throw in some swimming lessons.  What a steal!

Linda convinces a frightened Ang to take a motorcycle lesson for their birthdays in an effort to feel younger.  This seems like the worst idea EVER, although Ang is certainly dressing the part.  She quits before she even learns where the break is.  Linda hits the open road parking lot, and Ang wants in on the fun.  She climbs on the back of Linda’s bike, but I really think she needs a helmet.

Ang and Janine are spending the day being pampered.  Janine reveals that Dom is surprising her with a date night for her birthday.  Ang is excited that Janine is clueless, and she leaves her at the spa, making the employees promise they won’t let Janine leave.  Ang leaves the spa and is greeted by a monsoon.  The guests are arriving at Dom and Janine’s, and Janine calls to find out who is coming to get her from the spa.  She also wants to know what all the background noise is.  Dom has his story all worked out, and Janine is shocked and thrilled at the surprise party.  Let the insanity commence.  It’s pouring down rain, but I think most of the guests are drenched because of the amount of liquor everyone is dumping on one another.

Linda and Jen join Ang at her pool.  The poor pool boy is pouring shots, wiping sweaty brows, lighting cigarettes, and being molested by Linda.  Neil arrives and questions the young man fanning his wife.  Ang explains that she got the pool boy as a present for herself since Neil never buys her anything.  Neil can’t really argue with that logic, although he sheepishly says that he has a present “on the way.”  Sure he does.  Ang dismisses Neil from the pool area so her present can continue feeding her grapes.

Next week, Neil plans to tattoo himself with Ang’s likeness for her birthday gift, and she does a lingerie photo shoot…we’re in store for a lot of blurring next episode!

TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE?  HOW CRAZY WAS JANINE’S PARTY?  HOW SORRY DID YOU FEEL FOR THE POOL BOY?

[Photo Credit: VH1]

 

 

X