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I guess it's par for the course.  If you go on a Housewives franchise, chances are people will dig up dirt on your past.  Even better?  If you don't have a juicy past, they'll make up some stories!  Just ask Real Housewives of Miami's Joanna Krupa.  She was recently accused by The Dirty (because that's a legit site) of being a high priced call girl.  As you know, the story was quickly retracted (or taken down…I doubt anyone at The Dirty knows the meaning of the word "retracted") when the supermodel threatened legal action. 

So, what have we learned?  The Polish beauty never accepted money in exchange for boring, rich, socially awkward men's attention.  Color me shocked…not.  However, the reason her name (and picture) was brought into this crazy gossip has finally come to light.  It's basically the ol' bait and switch…some millionaire Madame shared Joanna's pictures on her website, and when men would request the leggy blonde, said madame would do her best to hook him up with a lookalike.  That is not shady at all…said no one EVER.

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Fox News has the story of Joanna's mistaken prostitution identity.  Former NYC Madame Kristen Davis, who was at the top of the multi-million dollar escort game until she was busted in 2008, does recognize Joanna's picture, but not because the RHOM star used to work for her.  She admits, “I used to steal her (Krupa’s) photos. I took her pictures off of Maxim. Your turnover is really high, so you don’t invest in photos.  I would match her up with a girl that looks like her.”  That's totally legit. I guess she didn't feel the need to give photo credit to Maxim on her site. 

Hilariously, Kristen is upset with The Dirty's reporting, yet not for the same reasons as Joanna.  The Dirty alleged that the supermodel would bring in a hefty $10,000 a night.  That fee is laughable to the former pimp who served four months of a two year jail sentence.  She clarifies, “I would charge $3,000 an hour, four hours minimum usually, for a top model, with three calls a night. You do the math. It adds up. The clients were head of industry, athletes, sport stars. You actually want to spend time with them. Girls actually enjoyed it. The mentality of the guy is very appreciative of the girl. The woman you see on the billboard in SoHo just walked through the door.”  That entire statement sounds creepily like the opening scene of a Law and Order: SVU episode.

Kristen adds, “A lot of my girls were top models … Victoria’s Secret, Ford Models. Say Girl #1 got a L’Oreal commercial, after agencies and taxes, [her] $30,000 [fee] then turns into $20,000. These girls are not normal girls who shop at BeBe. Their lifestyle is outside of their means. That money lasts a month and a half. Some girls have cocaine habits, party a lot, and you’d be surprised, for some [$20,000 lasts] maybe a week.”  A week?  Who are the people who can run through that much money in such a small amount of time?  I'd like to challenge them to a wrestling match (I'd win…I'm scrappy!) for half of that amount.  It would take me through at least a season.  At.  Least.

Former high-priced escort and author of Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl Tracy Quan shares, “I had friends [who were] actors, models, singers, aspiring directors and photographers; that whole world of entertainment, there is compatibility. They’re drawn to the escort world. There’s a sense of drama.”  No.  Drama is auditioning for Emily in your high school production of Our Town.  Sleeping with strangers for cash does not equal drama.  It equals sketchy…and illegal…and gross…and scary…and dangerous.  Have I made my point?

While Tracy penned a tell-all about her experiences, Kristen promises, “I used fake pictures to protect the girls on my website and never used real names. The moment they walked in the office we created a new name and that was how she was known from then on.”  Well, isn't that the sweetest?  If you'd said from the get-go you established alter egos for your hookers, I wouldn't be so concerned about them!  Some days I feel like I'm living in an alternate universe.  Anyone there with me?

Tommy Secor, President of Stars Model Management, also weighs in on the troubling phenomenon, saying, “It’s the most brutal industry in the world. You’re not selling a car, a product; you’re selling yourself. No other business in the world is like this. It’s impossible to make real money. There are so many beautiful girls and so little jobs; so few people ever make a living at it.”  Isn't that why people wait tables?  I am truly not trying to be snarky, but as someone who has always held multiple jobs and manages to pay most of (sad, but true) my bills, I have never thought of prostitution as a viable option…and not just for the degrading, illegal aspects either.  I'm a germaphobe. 

Tommy adds that often impressionable model-wannabes can be lured into the escort business when legitimate modeling gigs dwindle.  He reveals, “It definitely happens. There are girls who go to the darker side of modeling; escort services. It happens. We don’t have anything like that here.”  Of course not. 

For Joanna's sake, I'm glad that her reputation was saved from a potentially damaging accusation.  However, the Olivia Benson in me just finds this entire underworld to be tragically sad.

TELL US-WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON ESCORTS?  GLAD TO SEE JOANNA'S NAME CLEARED?

[Photo Credit: Fayes Vision/WENN.com]

 

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