Last night was a Sister Wives' road trip from hell. I got totally stressed out just watching it. Kody Brown's behavior rivaled that of his youngest children, and we learned that Meri Brown and Robyn Sullivan-Brown's great-great-(and great) grandfathers were both hanging out in Nauvoo, Illinois at the same time. Perhaps that's why they have such a connection? Christine Brown fancied herself a Chris Brown with her impromptu stand-up routines during the sofa interviews, and I think that Janelle Brown said maybe three words. She was probably still traumatized from the road trip.
The episode begins as the family is celebrating Logan's birthday. Kody announces that everyone is going to file into two RVs for a road trip to Nauvoo, Illinois which is where the Church of Latter Day Saints gained popularity. While the Browns aren't a part of that denomination, they are looking forward to learning more about their Mormon forefathers. Needless to say, the teenagers aren't super thrilled at the idea of driving three days to Illinois to learn their church history, while the younger kids just hear "RVs."
Hunter and Logan manage to get out of the pilgrimage thanks to prior plans and football camp. The teen girls are beyond jealous of their brothers' good fortune. Logan and Hunter aren't even pretending they're upset to missing this debacle. Christine and Robyn will be staying in hotels while the other ladies will be bunking in the RVs.
CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE!
We are treated to a little religion lesson about the LDS Church. It was founded by Joseph Smith who had a brother named Hyrem. Brigham Young became the Church's leader after the death of Joseph, and he is responsible for moving his people from Illinois to Salt Lake. Once the Browns arrive in Nauvoo, they will be staying at a Hyrem's farm. Oh, and Joseph and Hyrem were murdered.
Apparently, many people in the Mormon community think that Kody and his lion's mane look like Brigham Young. Somewhere Brigham Young is rolling over in his grave. It takes the family fifteen hours to get to their first scheduled stop. It should have only taken roughly eight hours. Christine is talking a. Lot. A whole, whole lot. Meri is being quite the task master when it comes to adhering to the schedule. Perhaps Road Trip With Sister Wives could be a spin-off competition show. Of course, if contestants have to be stuck in an RV with the Browns traveling half way across the country, doesn't everybody lose?
The poor teens are not loving this road trip. Can you blame them? After as second full day of driving, everyone is frustrated. Kody relays that it is hard to rotate among his wives during a road trip. It's unanimous–the wives hate the term "rotate" when it comes to wife-sharing. On day three, the family is experiencing some very windy weather which is slowing them down even more. Kody is getting an attitude about lack of sleep and driving. Meri is fine to continue driving which leads Kody to a tantrum. He just wishes his wives would obey him. Christine reminds Kody that his behavior is disrespectful. Um, you think? Kody blames his outburst on his exhaustion as well as his desire to ride with each wife.
The family finally decides to stop at some local landmarks. In Topeka, Kansas, the crew visits Truckhenge. The owner of said display is wearing a shirt that says "You say 'psycho' like it's a bad thing." That says it all. His artistic display of vertical trucks is equally as entertaining as his constant bird-flipping. The teens join him in a picture where they are also giving the middle finger. I think they are directing it at their dad who insisted upon this horrible trip. Kody is still cranky and annoying. His wives can't understand why he is so stressed…they are all fine, despite the lack of sleep. Kody brings the family together for prayer and asks for patience.
The crew makes another pit stop…this time in Mark Twain's hometown. Wow, settle down there, Browns. Dont' get too crazy! Their tour guide reads a passage from Mark Twain's take on polygamy where he wrote that polygamist men were doing an act of Christian charity by marrying a harem of such unfortunate, homely, and downtrodden women. Twain wrote (jokingly, I presume) that he could happily have had multiple wives until he saw how tragic the Mormon women looked. The family finally arrives at Hyrem's farm, and the wives are besides themselves to see their kids playing on the same land that their prophet once played. Robyn may have even teared up a little.
The following day, the family meets with a tour guide who is going to give them the tour of Nauvoo. Their tour guide is a Mormon, but he doesn't believe in plural marriage. Their tour guide reveals some pretty juicy gossip among the Smith brothers and Brigham. Joseph had been keeping his polygamist lifestyle a secret from his brother, and Brigham spilled the beans to Hyrem. Apparently Joseph had thirty-three (approximate) wives, twelve of which were married to other men. Brother husbands! The wives are appalled, but they know that the historians don't know all of the facts. The tour takes them to a former newspaper press which was destroyed for printing about Joseph's polygamous ways. Meri's great-great grandfather watched Joseph and the rioters burn the press. The tour then goes to the courthouse where Joseph faced charges for his actions. The next stop on the Brown's tour would have been a Mormon museum, but the curator doesn't want the family to come into the museum…because they are polygamous.
The family then goes to the jail where the Smith brothers were once held. Guess what? Robyn's great-great-great grandfather was Joseph's lawyer. When the brothers were being held, an angry mob stormed the jail and killed the Smith brothers. Meri is teary. Kody is angered that someone would judge his prophet's actions. He then references getting nagged by his wives who are ping ponging him back and forth, complaining about not getting to spend enough time with him. He's so romantic!
Next week, Kody gets a haircut (no, seriously!), and Logan heads off to college. It's the season finale which will be followed by a Brown family interview.
TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT'S EPISODE? WOULD YOU HAVE SURVIVED THAT ROAD TRIP?
[Photo Credit: TLC]