"Sean Lowe and one of his final two sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes a televised reality dating competition, then comes marriage, then comes…"  Yeah, this isn't quite working out as I'd planned.  I guess the nursery rhyme didn't take modern day fame-whore-dom romance into consideration when singing about baby carriages.  Who makes out in a tree anyway?

Things are heating up as the Bachelor season draws to a close.  Will Sean find true love?  Will he propose?  If so, will he be able to keep it in his pants until saying "I do"? 

ABC is constantly out-doing itself by touting the "most dramatic" or the "most romantic" or the "most shocking" rose ceremonies/hometown dates/proposals in Bachelor franchise history.  I would have appreciated the network's stance even more had it just been honest for once.  If Chris Harrison told me it was going to be the "most vanilla" season in the franchise's history, I would have still tuned in every Monday.  ABC needs to give its viewers more credit.  We're creatures of habit.  No matter how much we never again want to see anyone making out in a hot tub or handing out a rose, we'll still be there.  Count on it.


Life & Style is so excited to have the skinny on Sean's alleged engagement, and given that there are only two ladies left, the office voting pools are in full swing.  After the dramatic (and silent) exit of AshLee Frazier this week, Sean has the difficult decision of proposing to Lindsay Yenter or that other girl Catherine Guidici.  Either is a stellar choice, right?  Right?  RIGHT???  Oh, Sean.   

A relative of Sean's speaks with the magazine on the condition of anonymity.  I swear I won't tell anyone it's his fourth cousin twice removed on his step-uncle's dog groomer's side.  Said family member is chatting about Sean's betrothed, sharing, “She can’t wait until the show ends so she can finally start planning the wedding.  She doesn’t want to wait.”  If she waits, America forgets.

Fear not, fans.  It's not a romp in the hay that prodded Sean into proposing.  He's in love, y'all.  Sure, he wants to give up his V-card (again), but he's not rushing into marriage just so he can diddle one of the girls he played Scrabble with in the fantasy suite.  A friend of Sean's reveals, “These two want to make it official pretty soon.  They’re getting married quickly for love, not for the sex.  He’s [Sean] head over heels for her, and he wants to share that with the world.”

Of course, what better way to share it with the world than to have ABC pay for a televised wedding.  Sean's already admitted he's on board for that, explaining, “My relationship developed on TV, so it almost would make sense to marry on TV."

This is really going to happen, isn't it?  Gag.


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