Keeping Up With the Kardashians Recap: Disaster In Vienna

keeping up with the kardashians season 9

Sunday's night's episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians was very different from the normal bad acting and over the top orchestrated storylines..or was it? Kim Kardashian and Kris Jenner traveled to Vienna and had the holiday from hell, but on a happier note we heard baby North giggling & even saw the back of her head at one point! Also in a completely shocking turn of events, Khloe Kardashian did not say vagina once. I'm serious. She has outgrown it, and has moved on to repeatedly saying c*ck.. this girl must have Tourette's.  

Things kick off with Kim negotiating wedding details with Mason and a silent Penelope. Kim decides to bore her sisters to tears upgrade from infants and starts to talk weddings with her sisters. So far on the Kardashian-West circus wedding there are whispers of Parisian churches, luxurious chateaus and three costume changes. I think she has a ‘what would Elizabeth Taylor do’ type of theme – opulent, extravagant and over the top. I mean she is like Elizabeth Jr., already on to her third marriage! The real shocker was that Kim wants to wear all white; something tells me after three marriages it's time to retire the all-white gown. Isn't that customary? #EmilyPost

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Kim notices her sisters were tired of her incessant babbling about herself so she decides to switch gears… and talks about herself some more (cue gasp). Kim is elated about her invitation to "host the Vienna Ball" in Austria. Her sisters on the other hand don't seem to share in her excitement. Maybe because she invited Mommy dearest instead of them? Here I thought Khloe and Kourtney would be overjoyed to get rid of the gruesome twosome for a couple of days!?

In other news Kourtney Kardashian aka Miss Indecisive and Scott Disick have bought a mini Casa de Kris. Scott is amazed, not by the house but that Kourtney actually ended up going through with the purchase. Apparently Kourtney is so indecisive, that sometimes she can't decide where to eat for dinner and Scott ends up going hungry. The kids seem thrilled with their new home; they are so excited, running around in the backyard with their Olympian Grandpa Bruce Jenner. I have to admit the house is beautiful!

Kris and Kim are packing for their vacation to Vienna. Kris is stressed about the weather. Kim is stressed as to why her prehistoric mother is packing sexy lingerie. Poor Kim thought it was just a girls trip for her, North and Grandma. She didn't count on Grandma wanting to get her groove back. The trio arrive in Vienna. (I spotted baby North – well maybe just the back of her but anyways this is like a fun ‘Where’s Waldo!’) Kris is on cloud nine with the VIP service. Kim is more interested in her phone than her palatial accommodation.

Unfortunately Kris's happiness is short-lived, as Kris has been robbed y'all! Chanel purses, Chanel shoes, Porshe sunglasses, gold clutches, Bottega bags and makeup are all missing from Kris's luggage. Kris feels violated, and I do feel sorry for her, traveling and losing luggage or having things stolen is an awful feeling! Kim calms her Mom down and reminds her that it is just material things that can all be replaced. Something tells me Kimmie Kakes thinks we all forgot her apocalyptic meltdown in Bora Bora over losing an earring. Maybe Kim has amnesia or maybe she has changed? Yep, I’m going with the former.

Back in la la land, Khloe, Kendall and Kylie are checking out the new house. Apparently Scott and Kourtney bought a mansion but forgot to evict the squatters. Their mansion has rats! Kourtney is freaking out over clutter, colors, interior design and now throw rats into the mix! Her head is practically spinning off in to another dimension and that dimension looks eerily familiar to her old home. Kourtney is putting off the move with excuse after excuse and now with the rats it looks like Scott will be able to turn their new mansion into his own private bachelor pad! #LordDisickIsWinning

kim kardashian vienna ball opera date richard lugner

Kris and Kim are rushing to get to the ball. Wolfgang (their Austrian assistant/tour guide/planner?) is freaking out the red carpet will close once the President arrives and the ladies won't make it. The ladies make it to the ball on time. The ball is absolutely magnificent, regal, elegant and stunning. I feel like Lisa Vanderpump would be in her element at the ball! Unfortunately the event turns sour when a guest arrives dressed up with his face painted black and starts to heckle Kim by announcing he is Kanye. It was in poor taste and marred the beautiful event. Kim goes in to a stiff kind of shock. Perhaps she thought he might be another flour bomber! Kim labels the attention seeker and his behavior as 'Not cool!'  How diplomatic. Kris however is appalled that someone could be so racist in today’s day and age; she feels like the culprit is ignorant and is causing society to take a huge step backwards. I can't believe it, but I am agreeing with Kris on this. Wolfgang is trying to reason with Kris, explaining that they are in a common holding area so he is free to be there, but Kris isn’t buying what Wolfgang is selling, she doesn't care and she is one pissed Momager, Mom and Grandmother. #TeamKrisTonight Right on cue someone offers Kris some Vodka. Unfortunately I don't think anything short of a horse tranquiliser is going to take Mama Kris's anger down!

Kris just wants Kim to finish her final live interview so they can get the heck out of dodge. Kim is being polite and complimentary and the male reporter/comedian is being beyond rude. He sarcastically states 3 hours ago he had no idea he would be attending and now it's the best day of his life. He rounds out his sarcastic spiel by saying he will be dancing later with N****** in Vienna (Kanye’s song title is n****** in Paris). Kim and Kris look mortified. At least I think that expression is called mortified I can't be sure under all the Botox? The comedian and the co-host are cracking up over his offensive racial slur but Kim and Kris don't say a word. I am so amazed they didn't lose it on live air! I think if Mama Kris had of been given an extra vodka she would have pulled a can of whoop ass out on those two! Kim and Kris make a swift exit, and by that I mean they practically fly out of there like there is a closing down sale a Barneys.

Back home in LA, Kourtney is searching for Scott. He announces he is happily living at their new place on a blow up mattress. Sidenote – did anyone notice the 'Love Me' neon light above their bed? I think Scott turns it on to remind Kourtney to actually love him. Kourtney decides to visit her baby daddy at their new abode although she has no desire to ever move in. Scott, the psychologist, announces that the issue is not the rats it's something much bigger and he needs Kourtney to face it. He tells Kourt he will be living in the new pad with or without her.

The ladies arrive home from Vienna, dubbing it the worst trip ever.  Evidently things got worse for the trio on the plane ride home. A crazed lunatic started yelling at Kim about her daughter being black. Khloe said she would have punched her! Kim reveals she wanted to but she was on a plane. Khloe retorts she still would have punched her, heck she announces she'd belt Kim too if she yelled at her baby! And this is why I love Khloe, I believe she would! Khloe starts to rant about hashtags, babies and only liking black c*ck. I think her rant made sense at the time, but I’m distracted by Khloe’s lips.. are they getting bigger? Kim goes on saying the crazy passenger kept screaming about her being with a black guy and telling her to shut her black baby up! Kim then says the captain and pilot and everyone had to get involved and the airline called LAPD on the plane’s arrival. I'm sorry but who was flying the plane if the pilots and captains were dealing with all this??  (and how did TMZ not get all the gory details of this flight/arrest)

Kourtney is finally on board with moving in to her new pad. Mainly because she has no choice – you see her old house sold and she has 9 days to vacate! I guess she is just going to have to quickly find a way to move beyond her demons surrounding change – and fast!

The episode ends with Kim deciding that she feels compelled to write a blog about her experience in Vienna and how she is sickened by the existence of racism. Kris encourages Kim to express herself, especially because racism could potentially be something that could affect North one day. Kim is terrified at the mere thought that her little girl would ever have to deal with anything like that in her life, but at the same time she wants her daughter to know she stood up and spoke out about racism. Kim reveals and both Kanye's mother and father were passionate activists who on occasion even got arrested for standing up for their beliefs and what is right! Kim proceeds to read a heartfelt blog explaining her thoughts and feelings regarding her experience.

It was a nice blog and I am glad Kim is using her celebrity to shine a light on real life issues instead of promoting another product.  

TELL US – WOULD YOU STAY IN THE HOUSE WITH A RAT PROBLEM? WHY DIDN'T THE NEWS OUTLETS CATCH WIND OF A WOMAN BEING ARRESTED FOR YELLING RACIAL HATE AT KIM AND NORTH?

Recap Author: Gina P.

Photo Credit: E! and Splash photos

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