Real Housewives of New York had a looooong hiatus while it got all its new ducks in a row. Sadly, either people forgot about them and didn’t bother going back or everyone is still sick of the lingering taint of acidic drama. Regardless of why less and less people tuned in, the ratings for the season five premiere were less than stellar. Like so less than stellar Kim Zolciak‘s wig reveal slammed RHONY!
According to The Huffington Post, the season premiere only drew 1.7 million viewers in it’s 9pm slot. Which is unprecedentedly low for a Housewives season premiere. Just for some perspective – Real Housewives of Orange County (previously the lowest rated in the franchise) got over 2 million viewers for it’s season premiere.
Allegedly Bravo isn’t too upset by the ratings. “Bravo didn’t expect the numbers to be huge,” a network insider revealed. “Monday is a new night for the show and it’s the most competitive night of the week.”
Amber Portwood just breaks my heart. Amber recently returned to prison to serve out the remainder of her original five year sentence. Amber was originally enrolled in a state funded drug rehabilitation program in lieu of serving time but she decided to leave the program and spend the rest of her time behind bars.
Well, Amber is speaking out about what led to her decision – and tragically it was a suicide attempt. Amber claims she became so depressed in her drug treatment program she over-dosed on pills and decided the program wasn’t for her, opting instead for a jail term.
This isn’t the first suicide attempt by the Teen Mom star. She attempted suicide last year and and announced that she had been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder.
Speaking to Good Morning America from jail, Amber explained the circumstances. “I had taken 30 Suboxone [a drug used to treat opioid addictions] within 3 days. The depression took over. I would take 4 or 5 at a time.”
Ok, it’s that time again! Reality Tea’s Booze ‘N Books Club! With zillions of reality stars – and new ones popping up every second – and each one with something to sell, we here at Reality Tea decided to test out some of these fetes of literary greatness. And what goes better with books that are badly written than cocktails? So we thought we’d try something fun and review some of these gems!
Each month Reality Tea will be reviewing both a book and a cocktail. Last month we kicked things off by reviewing Bethenny Frankel, the queen of reality star promotions and the inventor of the Bravo Home Shopping Network’s, new novel Skinnydipping and one of the umpteen Skinnygirl cocktails. We weren’t so impressed with Skinnygirl White Cranberry Cosmo, but the book – a little bit better. We invited our readers to participate in the fun by submitting some of their own reviews – and we got some good ones and some photos to match
This month, we’re reviewing Bravo’s other Home Shopping Network queen – the controversial Teresa Giudice. Teresa has turned lemons into well, money flavored lemonade and she is paying her bills (and hopefully her creditors) with her immense popularity and her old-school Italian recipes.
The Real Housewives of New Jerseystar’s newest cookbook – her third – is Fabulicous: Fast & Fit. On the NY Times Bestseller list for the third week in a row, the book advertises healthy alternatives to Italian recipes in 30 minutes or less. Teresa isn’t stopping there, she also has a bottled cocktail (I wonder where that idea came from? wink, wink) called Fabellini. Well, we hardworking girls at Reality Tea reviewed both and lemme tell you our jobs are really crappy.
CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR OUR REVIEWS!
Well, well, well… Alexis Bellino and Gretchen Rossi have officially broken the Blomb Squad (that’s dumb and blonde). Last night on the Real Housewives of Orange County the rain continued to pour in the jungle as Alexis found herself in the middle of an onslaught. And poor Gretchen got cast aside as Lex’s resident BFF after Alexis determined that she too was involved in the attacks. Oh, the politics of being a Housewife.
We continue where left off with the face-off round the dinner table. The rain makes me think that all of Costa Mexico is crying on Alexis‘ behalf. Alexis remindsTamra Barney that though she may believe she’s perfect, being a mean hateful bitch makes her flawed too. Alexis suggests Tammie Sue work on her own issues before pointing fingers her way. Like Alexis or not, she has a good point.
Alexis snipes that just because Tamra got her implants taken out doesn’t mean she’s real. Touche. And Vicki Gunvalson pipes up to remind us that all of them are fake as designers imposters perfume and that all these ladies are materialistic – that’s why they’re rocking LV and Chanel in the jungle. Alexis accuses Tamra of badmouthing her which is why Terry thought she was fake – Tamra denies it. Sadly, it was actually Gretchen who was badmouthing Alexis behind her back to Terry.
Yesterday, Mrs. Kim Zolciak-Biermann had a long day of communicating with TMZ. First a source close to her told the gossip site that she was certainly NOT being evicted as previously reported. And although Kim told everyone at the Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion that she was “closing” on her “dream house,” she and hubby Kroy Biermann have since changed their mind, citing the $3M listing price was over-valued by a million dollars.
Kim also said her landlord/interior decorator, the formidable Kendra Davis, threatened to evict her after she walked away from the purchase deal and then Kendra started bad-mouthing her on Twitter. This was after Kim started badmouthing her on Don’t Be Tardy For The Wedding (and Twitter) of course!
Now there have been many rumors about Kim‘s attempt to purchase said mansion – namely that she and Kroy couldn’t get approved for the $2.5M mortgage required to buy the property. Of course we don’t have access to Kim’s bank account, so we have no idea if that’s true, but that’s the tea that was spilled.
It deeply saddens me to report this news, as I take it as a sign that Amber Portwood has given up hope. The Teen Mom star was just sentenced to five years in prison after asking an Indiana judge to reimpose her original sentence.
Amber has had a string of legal issues – most of them related to her substance abuse – recently she was participating in a drug treatment and sobriety program in exchange for serving jail time, but after she was kicked out of the program for missing too many requirements after a gallbladder surgery she decided to do jail time instead of campaigning to be reinstated.
Well, girls and boys… it finally happened. After months of build-up, Bravo unleashed the New New York and we finally caught a glimpse of Real Housewives of New York without Jill Zaaaaaaaaarin. For those of you who never thought you’d live to see the day – rejoice – but sadly it seems Pinot Singer has hopped right on up into the bitter, negative, biddy role that Jill so recently vacated. Dangit, Pinot!
Last night we were treated to some delightful new blood, and while Sonja Morgan was in good spirits and ready to move on and make new friends but keep the old, LuAnn de Lesseps, Countess no more and Pinot were still circling each other like round the UES rosie with the same old axe to grind. Sonja said the only thing worse than stale brioche at a party is stale guests… well meet your stale guests. Are people still eating brioche?
Things open with LuAnn and newbieAviva Drescher pretending they’re long lost friends and doing lunch. Let’s just call it what it is – they’ve met each other a total of two times and Bravo is forcing them to interact as buddies to stack the odds. The only interesting thing that came out of this to-do was the revelation that Aviva’s ex-husband Harry has quite the active social life - so active that he’s dated and most likely boinked LuAnn and Sonja.
Kenya Bell has apparently realized that despite the antics on Basketball Wives – at least something good can come of it – her burgeoning music career! Kenya just released a new single titled “Hate Me,” in which she calls out bullies and well, haters. No, she doesn’t name Evelyn Lozada by name, but I think we get the message!