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Jersey Shore

Sweet relief!  A certain network realized this week that two hour long episodes of the Jersey Shore weren't holding our attention.  Thank you, MTV!  Do you know what I realized?  It's fun to watch the intro that features the gang circa season one given the amount of plastic surgery the girls have had.  I almost don't recognize Jenni "J-Woww" Farley when she talks about ripping guys' heads off after sex!  Of course, DJ Pauly Delvecchio looks exactly the same. 

Last night begins at the tail-end of the Bamboo brawl.  Andre 3000's twin is dressed as "Where's Waldo" and his entire purpose seems to be holding back an overly aggressive Vinny GuadagninoRoger is scrapping with bouncers and pushes Jenni aside.  She quickly throws a drink in his face in an effort to get him to chill.  Ronnie Magro-Ortiz is the voice of reason.  We all know that's never a good sign!  The gang vacates Bamboo, with Roger storming ahead, not listening to anyone who tries to reason with him. 

Jenni is wearing some God awful hot pink platform heels, and she seems to be limping.  Roger yells at her about getting involved in the fight while his friend tries to calm him.  Jenni tries to placate Roger, telling him she knows he didn't recognize her, and she's not mad at him for throwing her down because he clearly didn't mean to do it.  His reply?  "I knew it was you, and you deserved it."  Oh alcohol, bringing couples together for centuries!  Jenni and Deana Cortese head back to the house, and Deena is devastated by Roger's behavior.  Back at the house, Jenni is worried that she has a broken ankle.  Ronnie calls Roger to make sure he's okay and not sitting in jail, and Roger starts yelling about Jenni controlling him and playing the victim.  

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Before I start this Jersey Shore recap, I have to tell y'all that I used to love this show.  It was entertaining.  I adored that Vinny Gaudagnino and Pauly Delvecchio had a true bromance.  I cringed at Ronnie Ortiz-Magro and Sammi Giancola's volatile relationship.  I loved that Jenni Farley and Nicole Polizzi were like sisters, and I enjoyed the dynamic of crazy meatball Deena Cortese.  And Mike Sorrentino was there too. 

However, this show seems to have run its course.  I am not saying I want it to end, and I still love how much these crazy orange kids care for one another, but seriously?  Two hours?  Something's got to give, MTV.  Something has GOT to give.

Last night's episode begins as Snooki is moving into her own apartment right next door.  Jenni and Pauly help her pack up her stuff and head over to her cute "granny shack."  Jenni is still floored that the girl who hooked up with everyone (and peed on almost everyone), will be responsible for another human life.  Rawn comes over as well to check out Snook's new digs.

Mike chats with his sister on the duck phone and reveals he's going to a check-up and may get a shot to block opiates and alcohol.  His sister urges him to get the shot, but he doesn't want to be reminded of such a bad place in his life.  The Situation feels like his family and friends don't trust him.  His sister corrects him…they are just concerned and want the best for him.  Mike decides to get the shot.

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The Situation has found himself in many, many situations involving pussy. One could say he lives in a world of pussy galore. But his newest ad for the animal rights group, PETA has him surrounded by a whole nother type of pussy – and there's no smoosh room in sight! 

The Jersey Shore star has decided to use his fame for activism, which is a lot more productive than most of his extracurricular activities. In the new ad, Mike gives some advice he's very familar with. "Too much pussy can be a bad thing," the ad reads, serving as a reminder to spay and neuter your pets. 

“It was important for me to partner with PETA to raise awareness about the homeless animal crisis because so many dogs and cats must be euthanized each year because there aren’t enough good homes for them all,” Mike shares of his decision to particpate in the ad.

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Last night was the premiere of the sixth and final season of the Jersey ShoreVinny Guadagnino, Pauly "DJ Pauly D" Delvecchio, Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino, Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, Jenni "JWoww" Farley, Deena Cortese, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, and Sammi "Sweetheart" Giancola are all back for one last summer in Seaside Heights.  I had high hopes it was going to be epic.  After last night's two-hour episode, I'm not holding my breath.

First up we check in with the two roommates who won't be partying this season.  A sober Mike is having one last giant meal with his family after returning from rehab for prescription pills.  He claims to be the healthiest he's ever been, and I am happy to see Paula by his side.  I think she's good for him.  He says they're not quite dating, but they are close.  What does that even mean?  Meanwhile, a pregnant Snooki is excited to see the old gang, and wouldn't miss out on the experience just because for something as minor as expecting a baby.  She's done a total 180 (is that what it's called?) and there won't be any meatball antics with her.

JWoww and Roger are now living together after her quick stint as roommates with Snooki for their spin-off.  He isn't thrilled at the prospect of her heading back to the shore to party, but Jenni insists the couple is in a better place than last season.  She's just waiting on that much anticipated engagement ring!

Knowing he wasn't really winning any popularity contests last season the Situation has decided he is going to prepare an elaborate Sunday dinner for when his roommates arrive.  Snooki calls JWoww, and we learn that she hasn't spoken to Mike since last summer when he accused her (multiple times) of cheating on Jionni with him.  She doesn't want any drama.  Roger laughs…as if no drama was ever an option with this bunch!

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jersey shore party 2 051012

Last night was the premiere episode of the 6th and final season of Jersey Shore.  We'll have an awesome recap of last night's two hour kick off later today, but first we have photos from last night's premiere party in NYC. 

The Jersey crew, including Mike 'The Situation' Sorrentino, Jenni "JWoww" Farley, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, Sammi 'Sweetheart' Giancola, Deena Cortese, Vinny Guadagnino and Paul "DJ Pauly D" DelVecchio partied it up together to celebrate the season's launch – minus one very important guidette!   Snooki skipped the festivities, opting to watch the season premiere with her new favorite fella: her son, Lorenzo. 

It isn't a complete cast shot without Snooki, am I right?  I'm a little shocked they threw this soiree without her!
In any event, check out the photos of the rest of the cast in the gallery below!

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Um, we've got a Situation here.  Man, typing that never gets old!  Just in time for tonight's two hour Jersey Shore season premiere, news is breaking all over the place that Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino has fallen off the wagon.  Sitch entertained us with his abs in earlier season, but as the guidettes and juiceheads gained international notoriety, he seemed to have difficulty handling the fame.  In recent seasons, it was obvious that he didn't just love the booze. 

I don't think anyone was shocked when Mike entered rehab for prescription pill addiction.  It's going to be an interesting final season with the two biggest partiers out of commission due to Snooki's pregnancy and Mike's sobriety, although I am thrilled for both of them.  However, now that Lorenzo has arrived and the show has seen it's last fist pump, will the Situation be able to maintain?

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Get your spray tan and bump-it ready, because there is going to be yet another Jersey Shore wedding!  On the heels of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi and Jionni LaValle engagement (and baby Lorenzo makes three!), Jenni "JWoww" Farley and Roger Mathews have decided to make it official!

The couple has apparently gotten engaged, although we won't be seeing the Jenni's ring any time soon, thanks to MTV!  They've got to have something to show on season two of Snooki and JWoww, don't they?

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On August 26, Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi and her fiance Jionni LaValle welcomed a bouncing baby boy after more than twenty-four hours of labor.  Lorenzo Dominic entered the world, and now the first Jersey Shore offspring is gracing the cover of People magazine. 

The precious little guido has changed his once hard-partying mom for the better.  The reality television star is currently filming the second season of her spin-off Snooki and JWoww with her best friend Jenni Farley, but gone are the drunken antics of the Snooki the world met during the first five seasons of the MTV hit Jersey Shore.

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