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Teen Mom Recaps

Last week on Teen Mom, we saw Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra deal with Butch, Maci Bookout enroll Bentley in preschool, Farrah Abraham and her sister confront Debra about her bad parenting, after Sophia hilariously painted Farrah’s poor dog hot pink, and Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley work through Amber’s continued anger issues.

Tyler Pressures Catelynn About School

Tyler and Catelynn are hanging with two friends, Drew and Starr. Starr is an odd one, offering her “taco” and “hot sauce” to the dog. Tyler lets them know Butch had to leave the trailer park. The park had the audacity to accuse him of drinking beer. Butch was like, “Oh, no! I will not have them saying I drink beer. I told them, my drug of choice is cocaine.” It’s quite shocking, actually, that they didn’t make an exception on the spot. Hell, they should have made him trailer park monitor with those credentials. So, Butch is on the loose in Detroit, and Tyler and Catelynn have been relieved of their babysitting duties. Tyler is just hoping for the best for his Pop at this point. This is the closest Butch has come to not being on parole in twenty years.

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Last night’s Teen Mom wasn’t quite as depressing as I thought it would be, so that’s a plus right?  There were other pluses too…a dog got painted, Maci finally realized Bentley needed to socialize with kids his own age, Amber decided to stick it out in rehab, and Butch reveals that he isn’t a big drinker.  Just wait.

Farrah Abraham is a Less Than Happy Hostess

Farrah’s sister Ashley is visiting her in Florida.  Her mom will be arriving in the next few days for a visit.  Farrah reveals that she and Sophia have a more better place to live in Florida than she ever had at her mom’s house.  Yes, yes, Farrah.  It’s way more better.  How’s school?

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Last week on Teen Mom, we saw Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra welcome home Butch, Maci Bookout crash Bentley’s vacation with his dad, Farrah Abraham try dating, and Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley get therapy.

Catelynn’s Unfortunate Fashion Choices

If you blinked, grabbed a snack, or called Iowa to warn them Farrah was on the way, you probably missed Catelynn‘s contribution to this episode.

Butch announces he’s off to find a job.  That’s the end of the Butch scenes, which is a darn shame.  Next week’s previews show Butch flabbergasted that somebody ran a background check on him, so he’s either having issues finding employment or he’s heading back to the slammer.

Catelynn’s grandmother comes for a visit.  While she’s there, Catelynn and Tyler‘s adoption counselor Dawn calls to invite them to attend an adoption support group meeting.  I was really hoping Catelynn’s grandmother and Dawn were setting Catelynn up, and instead of  support group, they were whisking her away to What Not To Wear.

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Last week on MTV‘s Teen Mom, we saw Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra graduate, Maci Bookout invite herself on the Edward’s family vacation with Bentley, Farrah Abraham adopt a puppy, and Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley contemplate the future of their relationship.

It was mind numbing – at best.

This week must be the Teen Mom beach special.  With the exception of Catelynn and Tyler, who are busy caring for their new bundle of joy, all of the crazy kids, plus adult Farrah, are at the beach.

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Thankfully, Teen Mom wasn’t nearly as depressing this week. Last week’s premiere of Teen Mom was a train wreck.  This week, instead of weeping like a fool, I sat completely dumbfounded.   These girls have come so far yet have gone nowhere.  How is that possible? I spent the bulk of the hour resisting the urge to bang my own head against a wall.

At least the super adorable and maturing (someone has to, right?) toddlers bring a new aspect to the show.  Too bad we can’t just watch them and skip their parents.  Let’s pitch ‘Dr. Drew’s Daycare’ to MTV.

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Last night MTV decided to punish grace us with thirty extra minutes of Teen Mom, which was a tad confusing as it was just thirty extra minutes of the same old, same old. It seemed unnecessary. But enough of that, the ninety-minute episode had Amber continuing her legal battles with Child Protective Services, more drama erupting between Maci and Ryan, Farrah’s family going to counseling, and Catelynn and Tyler vacationing on Dwight Shrute’s beet farm.

Once out of the clink, Amber breaks up with Clinton so she can focus on herself and Leah. She was apparently in jail for twenty-four hours. I know this because she must tell her friend that twenty-four times during a two minute phone conversation.

Catelynn has finished her requirements for graduation. Even though their ceremony is a few months away, she and Tyler are eager to find out how Carly’s adoptive parents will respond to the invitation to come see the pair accept their high school diplomas. One quick check of their ipad (thanks, MTV!) reveals that Carly’s adoptive parents have sent Catelynn an e-mail. They are very proud of the teen’s accomplishments, but they are unable to give an answer as to whether they will come to graduation. They need more time to think about it. Not defeated, Catelynn and Tyler can see what a difficult decision this must be for Carly’s adoptive parents. The couple hopes that they will come, but they understand if they choose not to attend.

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On last night’s Teen Mom, Farrah continued her North American trek to find somewhere warm and sunny to live, Amber went to jail, Maci decided to go back to school, and Tyler and Catelynn worked on some relationship issues.

Amber and Gary are getting along swimmingly until Amber is arrested for domestic battery. Gary tells his mom it’s hard because Amber is doing everything she needed to do, they have finally developed a friendly, civil relationship, and the battery happened over six months ago.

Farrah is over her plan to move to Arizona and now wants to get her bachelor’s degree at a school in Florida. She discusses her plan with her mother who is supportive of her daughter furthering her education, but voices the same concerns about childcare for Sophia. Farrah explains that lots of girls her age have the experience of going off to college, and while her mom agrees, she points out that most girls her age aren’t trying to go to college full time with a toddler. Farrah’s mom offers to keep Sophia while Farrah moves to Florida, as plane flights home to visit Sophia would be much cheaper than full-time childcare if Farrah were to have her daughter with her full-time in Florida. Farrah become very upset at this suggestion.

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On last night’s episode of Teen Mom, it’s time for witches, monsters and costumes…and I’m not talking about the actual cast. Happy Halloween, Teen Moms! Amber struggles with her recent Child Protective Services investigation, Farrah does her best to finish culinary school on a high note, Maci and Ryan don’t succeed in co-parenting, and Catelynn and Tyler look for employment.

Tyler and Catelynn hit up a local haunted corn maze, and while I am normally TERRIFIED by these kinds of things in real life, it looks ridiculously silly on television. The couple assesses their finances and realize they both need to find an after-school job. They are growing up so fast.

Sophia is “helping” Farrah load the dishwasher as she stresses over the end of culinary school. Sophia seems to be as hard-headed as her mother. Farrah’s mom hopes her school recipes are gluten free so she can sample. Farrah accepts an invitation from her sister, with whom she’s had issues, to go to the pumpkin patch the following day.

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