Jersey Shore Recap: GTB and RTS

After last night's episode of the Jersey Shore, MTV hosted a Restore the Shore special to aid victims of Hurricane Sandy.  Of course, the network wanted to keep us abreast of all things Jersey telethon, so they updated during commercial breaks.  Manning the duck phones are Teen Moms Catelynn Lowell and Maci Bookout, as well as Real Housewives of New Jersey's Melissa and Poison Gorga.  You've got to love when two worlds networks collide. 

I must say that I appreciate Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, Jenni "JWoww" Farley, Sammi "Sweetheart" Giancola, Vinny Guadagnino, DJ "Pauly D" DelVecchio, Deena Cortese, and Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino are doing for their beloved shore.  You have to admit that these kids have come a long way.  Snooki was even a guest host on Anderson Live yesterday, and she actually sounded slightly intelligent and not at all the cooch flashing train wreck of seasons past.  Baby steps.

We begin with Rawn, Snooki, and Deena working at the Shore Store.  The meatballs are already hoping to bail on their shift, and hard-working Ronnie is beyond frustrated.  He and Danny retaliate by donning trucker hats and ditching work like true meatballs.  Mike calls his sister and dishes on Paula.  He wants a classy girl, and his sister gives him advice on how to proceed with "shocking" Paula.  A giant storm rolls in (which I realize is nothing compared to the super storm), and Snooki and Deena are freaking out.  Down the boardwalk, Ronnie and Danny drink fruity cocktails and laugh about the chaos the girls are likely unleashing on the store. 


Back at the house, Mike shares with Vinny and Pauly that he can no longer take his girlfriend's shocking behavior.  She has the mouth (and hand signals) of a sailor.  Pauly thinks that Paula should be better at picking up Mike's hints, while Vinny respects her potty mouth.  However, both roommates think Mike should be with someone more like his sister.  The trio jokes about making a break-up t-shirt.  Mike needs to be sensitive though because he still wants her to be DTF post split.  He's such a gentleman.  The guys head to a bar, and groupies are giving Mike advice on how to break up with Paula. 

On the beach, Rawn and Sam add their two cents about Paula.  Sammi doesn't see what the problem is…why does it matter that Paula acts like one of the guys?  Later Mike and Deena head to the boardwalk.  I'm shocked these two have become such good friends.  Mike rattles off the laundry list of things that makes him even better than he was three summers ago.  Yeah, it's decided.  He can't waste his good-looking mug, ripped muscles, and sexy wardrobe on just one lady.  It wouldn't be fair to the rest of us!  Did I mention he's humble too?

The roommates sans Snooki and JWoww are congratulating Mike for doing so well with his sobriety.  He's been clean for one hundred days, and the crew heads to dinner to celebrate.  Again, Snooki and Jenni are nowhere to be seen.  Sammi wants to know if Sitch is going to try to mend fences with Snooki.  Vinny believes that Nicole wants to forget her drunken slutastic past, so she distances herself from him and Mike because they are reminders of how she used to behave.  Rawn agrees, saying that is the reason she doesn't bring Jionni around them anymore.  Vinny thinks that he and Snooks are in a better place than they were, but he misses how close they used to be. 

At home, Sammi asks Snooki if Vin and Mike will be invited to her wedding.  Nicole wants Vinny to talk to Jionni before she makes that decision.  She wants them to be friends.  Mike, however, will not be making the guest list.  When did Joan Jett move into the shore house?  Oh wait, that's Jenni.  Snooki doesn't think she ever wants to repair her friendship with Mike.  He embarrassed Jionni and made a mockery of their relationship.  Although she didn't technically use the word "mockery."


Pauly, Jenni, and Snooki head to work with Snooks wearing a full-on sequined jacket.  She isn't feeling well, so she and JWoww take a break.  Snooki feels like she can only talk to Jenni because she doesn't want to bother the other roommates with her pregnancy woes.  Jenni believes they are a team with Snooki's pregnancy, and she needs to be more open to letting her friends help her.  Snooki reveals that she's waiting for Mike to talk to her, but if he's not willing to apologize, she's not willing to listen to him.  Jenni approaches the guys about doing a shore shower for baby Lorenzo.  She wants it to be a surprise.  Vinny doesn't think that he'll be invited, but since Jenni is creating the guest list, he makes the cut.  She suggests that Vinny approach Jionni at the shower to smooth over their differences.  Vin is reluctant.  He thinks that if Snooki wanted him to talk to Jionni she would have told him herself.

JWoww enlists Deena and Sam to help plan the shower.  It's funny to watch them try to spell "hors d'oeuvres," but to be completely honest, I had to look it up myself.  Jenni calls Jionni to get him involved in Operation Secret Shore Shower Baby Brunch.  She feels a lot of pressure planning the perfect party for her godson.  Deena and Sam stock up on gifts for Lorenzo.  At the house, Mike answers the duck phone as proceeds to ask "who is this" knowing full well it's Paula.  She confronts him about telling everyone under the sun about wanting to break up with her…except for her.  He lies and backtracks, but he manages to work in the fact that she's morphed into a foul mouthed perv since they made things official.  Well, he really just tells her that she's changed.  A sniffling Paula asks for another chance.  Meanwhile, we're entertained by Snooki and Deena getting lectured by police for riding two deep on their rascal. 

Vinny, Rawn, and Jenni are at the Shore Store.  Ronnie isn't happy because he believes Jionni isn't being the best fiance.  He's too busy sunbathing to come spend time with his baby mama.  Wanting to entertain herself while she's all by her lonesome, Nicole finds a penguin balloon she names Jumanji to spend a sober, carefree day on the boardwalk with her.  Pauly calls Vin and requests he make a "Let's Make It Unofficial" shirt for them to give to Mike.  It's time for GTB: Gym, Tan, Break up with Paula.  Rawn can't wait to wear his newly minted GTB shirt. 

Mike tells Deena and Sammi that he was floored to hear that Paula had gotten wind of the impending break-up.  Deena wonders how he is surprised given he's told practically everyone in Seaside Heights.  The girls hope that Mike breaking Paula's heart won't making their tanning sessions too awkward.  Priorities.  The crew decides to tan before allowing Mike do the deed just in case things don't go well.  Rawn is proudly sporting his GTB tee.  He, Vin, and Pauly are literally sitting front row watching Mike and Paula's conversation.  He's stammering away, and she's on the verge of tears.  Rawn couldn't be more entertained.  Mike respectfully requests for things to go back to how they used to be…you know, when he was sleeping with Paula but could also hook up with other girls.  Paula hopes this will be her opportunity to remind Mike why he likes her so much.  They kiss and the guys are dumbfounded.  Worst break-up EVER.  Rawn doesn't understand.  He thought breaking up had to involve roid rage and caboodle damage.  MVP is excited to go back on the prowl.

In two weeks, the roommates have the surprise baby shower, and Pauly finds it hilarious that two guys at the shower have to apologize to the future groom for banging his fiance.  Also, it's the return of Angelina!

After the episode, all of the housemates except Mike are participating in Restore the Shore.  The images are just devastating.  Snooki is in tears seeing the destruction from the vantage of a helicopter.  There is no boardwalk in front of the Shore Store, and the rides are underwater.  Snooki does note that the shore house is still perfectly intact.  If it could survive the guido and guidette roommates, it certainly could withstand Sandy.

The co-hosts discuss how different donations could garner big things for those wanting to help.  For example, those who donate $200 will see their name scroll across the bottom of the screen during a Jersey Shore marathon.  There are many MTV stars calling donators to say thank you.  Throughout the special we will hear several of those awkward conversations.  Cameras follow Pauly D, Vin, Deena, Rawn, and Sam as they see Seaside for the first time. 

Vinny interviews several residents of Seaside Heights, including a very emotional mayor.  Stars like Taylor Swift, One Direction, Bruno Mars, Adam Levine, Pink, Jay Leno, No Doubt, Simon Cowell (was he just punched in the face?) and Christina Aguilera have taped well-wishes and memories which are shared, and Gym Class Heroes performs.  The gang gets a tour of the beach from the Seaside chief of police who thanks them for help. 

A camera crew follows Danny as he visits the Shore Store for the first time. It is a total disaster.  The roommates join Danny and tearfully help clean up the shop.  Danny pleads for donations.  This is really hard to watch.  Philip Phillips performs one of my favorite songs.  After watching that heartbreaking special, I have no doubt that the shore will be back and better than ever.


[Photo Credit: MTV]