Hollywood Exes Recap: Season Two Premiere


Finally!! Hollywood Exes returns for a second season with its original cast, Nicole Murphy, ex-wife of Eddie Murphy, Jessica Canseco, ex-wife of Jose Canseco, Mayte Garcia, ex-wife of Prince, Sheree Fletcher, ex-wife of Will Smith, and Drea Kelly, ex-wife of R. Kelly.

New to the cast this season is Shamicka Lawrence, who's newly divorced from Martin Lawrence, but she has yet to make an appearance. Daphne Wayans, ex-wife of Keenan Ivory Wayans, shows up briefly, but I suspect we won't be seeing much more of the diva. To kick off season two, Drea returns to L.A. with a grudge against Jessica, and Mayte considers adopting a baby girl in need.

Turns out, Drea is furious with Jessica, because she publicly tweeted that Drea is a hypocrite and fake. Drea believes that Jessica and her fake DDs need to take a seat, adding, "I'm too damn grown for a Twitter war." 

Also, Drea is over the "that's just her" excuse for Jessica's less than desirable behaviors. Enough is enough. "You come at me, I'm going to give it right back to you," vows Drea. "You bring it to me crazy, I'm going to deliver it to you crazy. For $19.95, plus shipping and handling, it's coming right to ya door." 


Last season, Nicole and fiance Michael Strahan bought a house in Bel Air, but it needs a complete renovation. The renovation (and life in general) falls into Nicole's lap because Michael is in New York, filming LIVE with Kelly and Michael. Nicole and her SIL/personal assistant tour the house and talk infinity pool, bowling alley, movie theater. Squee! I love the house storyline… love me some HGTV! 

Meanwhile, Mayte and her mom, Nelly, are walking their dogs. One tiny doggy hitches a ride in a baby carrier. Mayte still comes across as lonely, miserable, depressed, all of the above. She hates dating. She longs for a child. Rinse and repeat. New this season, Mayte is considering adoption, as a struggling family has reached out to her for help.


Sadly, Nelly refuses to support Mayte's decision to adopt, insisting that she can only be a grandmother to a blood relative. Nelly's reaction disappoints Mayte. She also reminds us that she lost a child while married to Prince. "I cannot keep mourning," she adds. "I need to move on." Unable to say no to a child that needs help, Mayte decides to move forward with the adoption, with or without her mother's support.

Next, Sheree, Jessica, and Nicole meet up, to use and abuse their credit cards. Correction – Michael's BLACK card – cha ching! Sheree walks away with black card envy. Also, Jessica reveals that she's seeing someone, and it's NOT Jose. Yay! Meanwhile, Mayte and Drea catch up over pedicures, and Mayte comes to realize that hearing about Drea's kids doesn't hurt as much as it used to. She wants to tell Drea about the adoption but decides to bite her tongue until it's official. More of the usual – they're hopelessly single and at least one person is always pissed off at Jessica at any given time.  

Mayte receives an email from the birth mother, she's 100% positive she wants Mayte to adopt her baby. Mayte is overcome with emotion, taking deep breaths, and decides to call her mom. Unfortunately, Nelly is unmoved by Mayte's obvious glee, saying that the baby needs to be placed in the system and Mayte needs to have her own child. Mayte points out that there's no man around to help her make a baby. On her way out the door, Nelly says, "Well, I'm not babysitting!" 

Jose and Jessica's daughter, Josie, is newly 16 and wants a car. Naturally. The VW? A nerd car! The Mercedes? Perfection! This comes from Jose, by the way, and Josie drives the Mercedes off the lot. Then, she terrorizes her parents out on the road, and I find myself wondering who decided that a sixteen year old is mature enough to operate a vehicle. Taking a break from Josie's horrible driving, Jose pisses in the bushes, and then proceeds to flirt with Jess. What. A. Catch. Jessica feels as if she and Jose are currently in a good place; however, she does not divulge that she's seeing someone new.


Mayte decides to share her good news with her friends, so the Hollywood Exes gather at Nicole's house. Worth noting, this includes Daphne, and Nicole simply introduces her as a family friend. Coming all together for the first time, Jessica senses tension coming from Drea, and Drea feels annoyed by Jessica's happy-go-lucky approach to life. Mayte wisely gets on with her announcement before someone whips out the crazy… $19.95, plus shipping and handling, and if you order in the next 10 minutes, we'll throw in a complimentary drink in the face. I bet Sheree the shit-stirrer really wishes she had one of those black cards now.

Mayte announces her plan to adopt a nine-month-old baby girl. Their immediate facial expressions appear to be mixed, but it's not long before everyone is smiling and calling themselves Auntie. Sheree asks if it's 100% a done deal. Mayte shares, the parents have said yes, but she still needs to contact her lawyers. Oh my. I really hope Mayte doesn't lose another child. Sheree welcome Mayte to the mommy club. 

Finally, Nicole learns that her father has died of cancer, and she calls Jessica with the news. Nicole shares that her father received his diagnosis only 4 1/2 months ago. My heart breaks for Nicole, and believe it or not, but she looks drop dead gorgeous even when crying. She's off to Sacramento to be with her mother. I realize this was taped some time ago, but still, our thoughts go out to Nicole and her family during this difficult time.


Photo credit: VH1