Shahs Of Sunset Recap: A Bad Bromance

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Last night's episode of Shahs of Sunset was fairly uneventful. For me, it felt like a filler episode to set up the showdown between Reza Farahan and Mike Shouhed on the next episode. Oh but Mercedes "MJ" Javid did do some of that pesky thing us regular folks call a job! I guess that's worth noting. 

To kick things off, Reza and Adam Neely are off to the mall. Reza pokes fun at Sears and Nieman Marcus in the same mall – this coming from the man who has Louis Vuitton shoes and IKEA furnishings in the same apartment. As they walk through the mall, Reza and Adam talk about the menu for their upcoming housewarming party, and they just happen to come across a Beluga caviar vending machine – a small can of caviar costs $3500, cash only. First, gross. Second, no problem for Reza, who whips out a wad of $100s. Adam wants to know who carries around that kind of cash, Reza says immigrants! Reza gives Adam props for going with the flow, adding, "With a little more training, he could be the quintessential perfect Persian wife." 

Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi and Asa Soltan Rahmati take a Tai Chi class in the park. Asa thinks it'll be good for GG, who lacks impulse control. At the same time, GG tells us, "MJ makes me want to cut her t*ts off and bitch slap her with them."  Tai Chi just makes GG horny.  Better luck next time, Asa.

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Next, MJ shows Leila's house to potential renters, wearing a yellow skirt that's two or ten sizes too small. The yellow spandex is so bright, looking directly at it blinds you. This is a blessing in disguise. Trust.

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Reza meets up with Sasha – awkward silence – then Reza apologizes. "You're wondering why I reacted to you the way that I had, regardless of my reasons, I owe you and your brother an apology." Sasha thanks Reza, then says he just wants to know why Reza is so angry. Reza explains that Sasha embodies all the shame he grew up with, and all those feelings came rushing back when they met. Their talk is nice. I really hope Reza's being sincere and learning from his deplorable actions. About being gay, Reza says, "At the age of 40, I accept it. I've finally come to terms with it, I'm done."

Mike shops for an engagement ring for Jessica, and he manages to make it ALL about HIM. He explains, the ring he chooses is a representation of him, his power, his wealth. The ring that Mike WISHES represented him costs $340,000 – but Mike's broke.  Because Reza sucks.  Boo. Hoo.  Mike says he wants the highest quality ring for the lowest price, and Mike's brother tells him that he can totally skimp on the ring since Jessica isn't Persian. Still, Mike's not "about" a 20K ring, and it's Reza's fault he can't get a 100K rings he feels entitled to. He leaves empty handed, vowing to "get creative" to make more money. 

Over dinner, GG decides to tell boyfriend Sean Sette the truth about making out with Shayan at Lilly Ghalichi's birthday party.  She also admits to still talking to him on a daily basis. Sean asks to read their text exchanges – GG opens her phone, scans the texts, and is like, yeah, no. "So MJ was telling the truth," hisses Sean. "You've been lying to me since the night at the club, letting me insult MJ, being played as the idiot." Sean breaks up with GG, who seem desperate to get alcohol into her system, for good. Good riddance to Sean – he seems like a douche.

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Reza prepares for his housewarming party, explaining that he has invited MJ and Asa – his grownup friends, but not Mike, GG, and Lilly – his childish friends. The pretentious donkey makes sure everyone who's at the party knows he spent $3500 on the Beluga caviar, then he reminds each person who takes a bite that he dropped $3500 on the Beluga caviar. Oh, and I'm not sure if you caught it, but Reza spent $3500 on the Beluga caviar.

Reza mentions that he has been working from home to avoid Mike since he betrayed Reza in his time of need (the club incident). "Mike has no deals," he continues. "Mike is lazy. Mike wants it right away. I paid my dues. He still hasn't brought anything to the table. I don't think Mike knows where he table is." 

MJ says she doesn't approve of the "immature silent treatment" – you see, she prefers to make passive aggressive digs and/or throw flower petals at people – so she urges Reza to reach out to Mike. Reza points out to MJ, "All the people that were in my life that got in the way of our friendship – Lilly, Mike, GG – are somehow not a part of my life right now. I've never loved you more, never felt closer to you. The common denominator between the three of them is that each one of them has a lot of growing up to do." 

Reza decides he wants to go into his 40s with only positive relationships, which includes Asa and MJ and excludes Mike, GG, and Lilly. Those three are much better off if you ask me!

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Elsewhere, Mike attends a poker game with old friends from Vegas, including Sammy Younai. Is winning a poker game Mike's "get creative" plan? There are hustlers and hookers everywhere – and Mike is absolutely green with envy. He sounds pathetic going on and on about their money, houses, cars, toys. But, I do enjoy Mike's friends throwing shade at Reza, "Who is this guy?  He's not even on our radar!"  

Mike continues to blame all his money problems on Reza.  He complains non-stop about walking away from a thriving (revisionist history) commercial real estate business to work with Reza on the residential side – because Reza hasn't taken the time to train him, blah, blah, blah. Mike's buddies tell him he's a lion, like them, but he works with a sheep. They say he needs to go back to commercial real estate if he wants big money. 

Mike's sad – mostly because he's broke, but also because his friendship with Reza is ruined. "Years and years of friendship and love and botherhood has gone down the drain." 

Shahs of Sunset returns January 7 with a Diamond Water launch party, a sex tape crisis for MJ, and a nasty showdown between Mike and Reza.

TELL US – IS REZA TO BLAME FOR MIKE'S FINANCIAL PROBLEMS? YOUR THOUGHTS ON REZA'S APOLOGY TO SASHA?

Photo credit: Bravo

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