Love & Hip Hop Hollywood Recap: Adult Swim

love and hip hop hollywood ray j

Oooh! Is it so sad that I waited all week for last night’s Love & Hip Hop Hollywood just to see Ray J’s lady fall in the pool? Geez Louise! I heard on the radio that this fool gets upwards of $30,000 A MONTH for sales of his sex tape with Kim Kardashian, and he made $50,000 last week alone when sales spiked thanks to Kim’s Paper magazine cover. My internet is still working though, so I’m going to say that was a fail. 🙂 

The episode begins with Nia going to Morgan’s to talk about the upheaval in her life. She wasn’t able to tell Soulja Boy until after she suffered a miscarriage. Nia informed him via text, telling him that she didn’t think he even cared. He ended up doing the mature thing and blocking her on Instagram and Twitter. Morgan wishes that men in general would learn to be more understanding, and Nia breaks down in tears. She feels that she may need a break from the relationship. 


Deciding to wash her hands of Berg, Hazel starts shopping around her music to other producers. She seeks the advice of her manager Doc, and he thinks (like the rest of the viewing public) that she needs to be focusing on her career and leave Berg in the past. Doc urges her to try to reconcile with Teairra Mari. Speaking of Teairra, she’s meeting Nikki for drinks (woohoo! I’ve missed that plastic!) and bringing Fizz as a potential suitor. Nikki and Fizz trade break up stories, and Fizz compliments Nikki by saying she should have been on the club’s billboard instead of Masika. Nikki reminds Fizz that she’s a “boss” and will never be on anyone’s billboard. Give me a break. The trio toasts to the single life before Fizz asks Nikki out on a proper date. Fizz’s dating radar is way off as far as I’m concerned. He’s quickly fallen from being my favorite…now Omarion can move into that top spot.

Moniece is taking a break from the sex toy industry to get back into music. She’s working with her cousin who is vocalist who works on The Voice. Moniece fills in her cousin on her recent struggles with Fizz regarding her custody with Cameron. He encourages her to stop fixating on the negative drama and work on herself. Clearly he’s not a regular on this show because he’s too intelligent, normal, and grounded. Moniece has goals: dildos, music, and co-parenting. Lofty aspirations for sure!

Ray J is still miffed at Morgan for still maintaining contact with his ex and current girlfriends. He decides to seek the advice of his more famous (maybe?) sister Brandy. Even Brandy blames Ray’s choices for the drama in his life. He needs to start taking responsibility for his actions instead of pointing the finger at everyone else. He is so whiny. The siblings gossip about Morgan being to involved in all of his business. Why does Ray think he can determine who is and isn’t allowed to talk to the ladies in his life? He’s such a d-bag. 

After the birth of Mega (I’m still not on board with that name), Apryl is still upset about the lack of a relationship she has with her mother. Omarion is forever the voice of reason as he asks Apryl to have patience with her mother when it comes to opening up about their broken past. That topic quickly falls by the wayside as they barter about what they can and can’t do in the bedroom until Apryl is fully healed from childbirth. I’ll never look at a 7-11 Slurpee the same way again after that conversation…scarred for life.

Nikki and Fizz are on their first date, and I feel like their discussion is far deeper than it should be for a casual drink meeting. He complains about Amanda and Moniece and her heated dildos, and Nikki offers to get her sex toys into her parents strip clubs. Fizz puts the kibosh on that as he’s tired of the ladies in his life meeting up and creating chaos. He stops looking at her boobs long enough to stick his tongue down her throat. Really, Mona? My eyes!

Soulja Boy feels a bit badly about blocking Nia on social media. He was hurt by her texts and wants her to realize that he lost a baby too. After some contemplating, he invites Nia to the studio so he can vape and work on their communication. Soulja tries to explain why it was so hard for him to express himself via text when he is in Brazil and trying to bring home the bacon. He reminds Nia that she signed up for this lifestyle, and they both suffered a loss when she miscarried. I actually feel like this is the only non-scripted(ish) scene from the show. A devastated Nia leaves with no resolution.

In hopes of mending fences, Hazel approaches Teairra to explain why she’s been so angry at her former friend. The girls have a heart-to-heart with Hazel apologizing for her behavior. Teairra wishes that Hazel had realized earlier that Berg didn’t have her best interests at heart. Both women have hurt feelings. Hazel wants to repair their friendship, but she offers up an ultimatum. She and Teairra can move forward as long as Teairra agrees to bag her album with Berg. Obviously, that won’t fly, and once again Teairra storms off and Hazel is left teary on a park bench. Sweetheart, I just want to give you some self-esteem.

Moniece apparently made some statements in the media about Fizz, and he wants to meet up with her to address her accusations. It amazes me how normal and rational Moniece can seem before going off the rails. Fizz wonders why she has portrayed herself as the victim by saying that he used to get physical with her, which he claims is a lie. She tells him that he did call her a bitch on several occasions and is always disrespectful. Moniece has this innate ability to remain calm while causing her adversary to lose their cool. Fizz is yelling and cussing as she quietly rambles down the street waxing poetic about fruit. Fizz screams that she is able to pursue a sex toy line but she can’t provide a stable living arrangement for her son. Truth? 

And it’s finally here…the moment I’ve waited for since this time last week. A squeaky, yet aggressive, Ray is prepping a romantic dinner for Princess to confront her about her lack of loyalty and question why she’s sharing their private conversations with Morgan. Ray starts off sweetly, but he quickly melts into a tirade about Princess talking about their relationship to Morgan. Princess shares that she loves Ray, but Morgan is still one of her best friends. Now that she’s hearing Ray’s concerns, she questions Morgan’s motives. Apparently Ray didn’t hear that, and he starts bitching about who’s the boss (Tony Danza, duh!) in their relationship. He thinks they should take a break. Princess begins slinging wine at him (there haven’t been many drinks thrown lately, have there?), and he tries to restrain her. She goes to push him into the pool, but he’s faster. A quick nudge, and we’ve got a soaked Princess. To be fair, he did just remind her of his anger management issues. Ray retreats into the house while the production crew blocks Princess from following him. Classic.


[Photo Credit: VH1]