Don’t Be Tardy Recap: Home Is Where The Fart Is

dont be tardy kroy kim

On last night’s Don’t Be Tardy, we were treated to a trip down memory lane for the former Real Housewives of Atlanta star. The photographs (oh the photographs!) alone were enough to make it a fabulous episode. Kim Zolciak Biermann with dark brown hair and braces? Yes please! The episode begins with Kim and Kroy heading to Connecticut, leaving Gloria and chef Tracey in charge of the brood. Not only is Kim scheduled to do an appearance at a casino, she’s also returning to her roots. The casino is in her hometown!

In their absence, Kroy has charged Slade with building a shelving system for the boys’ playroom. Wait, what? Slade is unsure as to whether he’s capable of constructing furniture, but he concedes that it shouldn’t be impossible. After all, he can read. Just not well, right? Returning to the town where she grew up, Kim is overwhelmed by the time warp. Nothing has changed, except her nose. Seriously, does she think we are that dumb? As the couple cruises the main drag, Kim remembers working at every fast food restaurant from Burger King to Taco Bell to Krispy Kreme. She always got fired for giving out free food to her friends.



Revisiting the apartment she first lived in when Brielle was first born, Kim recalls being nineteen, going to nursing school and working full time. She realizes that she was much more grown up at Brielle’s age than Brielle is. You think, Kim? Speaking of, Brielle and Slade kill my brain cells. The young duo heads to IKEA to pick up the furniture Slade has promised to put together for Kroy. On the ride back to the house, Brielle admits that she likely won’t be going to college at Kennesaw in the fall because she applied too late. She has determined that Atlanta Broadcasting School is better suited for her, because, you know, it’s like hair school, but for talk shows. Oh yes, Brielle is this generation’s Barbara Walters. 

dont be tardy kim

In Connecticut, Kim is meeting up with four of her best friends from growing up that she hasn’t seen in sixteen years. Kim jokes that they are probably more excited to see Kroy. That may not be much of a joke. The women laugh over memories and big haired photos of their teen years as Kroy blinks a lot and giggles. Kim explains her toxic relationship with her parents, and her friends share their disappointment while offering support. 

dont be tardy kims friends

As the hometown tour continues, Kim makes Kroy stop so she can show him the spot where she used to lodge tomatoes at moving cars when she was a teen. When people would stop to yell at her, she would escape through the sewage tunnel under the road. Kroy wants to laugh at this visual, but he’s concerned he’ll spew dip spit all over his wife’s tank top. A few blocks away, Kim and Kroy are cruising down a street where she says she used to strut in her daisy dukes with her tatas hanging out. Hot stuff! She tours her childhood home that is still inhabited by the family that purchased it from her parents. The owners are excited by the reality star busting into their house. She even spelled out her name in the sidewalk concrete. When she was younger, Kim predicted it would be her Walk of Fame star.

dont be tardy kroy


Back in Atlanta, Slade is struggling to piece together the IKEA dresser. His miniature helpers, Kash and Kade, are anything but. The boys are wandering off with various furniture parts and tools while Brielle hiccups like a dying cow. Tracey decides to wreak havoc on Gloria who is far too stuffy when it comes to having fun. The chef hatches a plan to ambush Tracey with NERF gun toting toddlers which involves Ariana pretending to suffer from a skateboarding accident. These little boys are quite the trained terrors. Here’s hoping Kim will home-school and spare any future teachers. The episode draws to a close as the couple finally arrives at the casino for Kim’s appearance. They have an initial meet and greet where Kim admits to farting in front of Kroy and swapping d*ck stories with her unfiltered fans. 


[Photo Credit: Bravo]