Real Housewives of Dubai Season 2 Premiere Recap: Beyoncé, Babies, and Beef

Photo Credit: Jenny Kim/Bravo via Getty Images

Welcome back to the desert! It’s time for the Real Housewives of Dubai Season 2, Episode 1 recap. Last season, Covid-19 threatened to ruin Stanbury’s engagement party to Sergio. As for the other Caroline, aka Brooks, she’s still Stanbury’s frenemy, but her bestie Taleen Marie is replacing Nina, so it’s all good, for now. On this week’s premiere episode, titled “The V.V.I.P.,” Beyoncé is the word of the day, as these alliances start to slowly shift. Here’s everything that went down on RHODubai Season 2, Episode 1.

Dinosaurs and wedgies

Photo Credit: Chris Haston/Fred Jagueneau/Bravo

We first see Chanel, serving a typical high-fashion look from the backseat of her SUV. From here, she tells a dinosaur joke to her son. It falls flat, but he groans and laughs anyway, because he’s a loving, appropriately cringed-out teenager.

We then see Sara rock climbing with her son. While climbing, he confirms that she has a wedgie. Speaking of rocks, over at Lesa’s, her son lost a tooth. He then poses like The Rock.

Brooks is up next, lighting up some sage at her business baby, The Glass House. Meanwhile, over at Stanbury’s, she and her child husband are filming a TikTok. They’re using pillows to hit each other because each hit equates to an answer given for their reel.

So far, it seems like all is well.

Just kidding. Hey Beyoncé, who’s the real V.V.I.P.?

Chanel struts her way into Club Padel, serving a look that costs more than my car, walking like she’s on her way to steal my man.

She’d win.

Lesa lovingly pokes fun at her and then starts to warm up for their little sports session. This causes Chanel to ask “What do you mean, stretch?” Chanel then tries to warm up, guided by Lesa, but overall, her moves scream fashion, not fitness.

Naturally, Lesa wins. Afterward, they sit down to chat, and Lesa notes that the last time she saw Chanel, it was at a private Beyoncé concert. Chanel remembers, clocking that they were both upgraded to be in the V.V.I.P. section, unlike their costars.

Enter in the confessionals, where Brooks refutes her costars narratives, saying that she “was so close to Beyoncé,” she “could smell her freakin conditioner.” Stanbury was also close enough “to get wet,” and she even “sat on the stage.” As for Sara, she didn’t even attend, saying “no, never” when asked.

Back at the courts, Chanel tells Lesa that she’s about to have lunch with Stanbury because she “wants to water the desert” on this broken friendship. Lesa supports it, for the gossip aspect. “Meet up with her, and then tell me everything,” she jokes.

Ice, Ice Baby

Stanbury and Sergio are now married, but their house is still under construction. Therefore, they’re living with her friend Michael, which has put a damper on their “sex gymnastics.” In their new house, there’s a baby room, because “Sergio’s ovaries are on fire.” Due to this, Stanbury reveals that she underwent IVF, and she has “one baby boy embryo on ice, where he can stay for the foreseeable future.”

Spas and Spiritual Healers

Stanbury and Sara attended the grand opening of The Glass House. Lesa and Chanel, however, did not. This is because Brooks only “invited the people who were the most important to” her.

Since Brook’s ex-husband was her contractor, and she’s rich, the build-out of The Glass House passed quickly. Also, ever since the cameras went down on Season 1, these exes have grown closer, which is awesome for their son.

Elsewhere, Sara is meeting with her Spiritual Healers. When it comes to relationships, she’s stuck. The healers let their instruments sound, as Sara screams into a pillow, releasing her traumas. It works, and she’s able to “cut those chords” internally as the drums sound.

BRB. Gotta bang on my pots next to my lottery tickets.

Mina Roe

Photo Credit: Yasmin Hussain/Bravo

Lesa’s boys got into Manchester City Academy. If one makes it as a pro, her “retirement plans” are set. While watching her boys train, Lesa’s business takes center stage. She’s rebranding Mina Roe, and her “haters will have a front-row seat” on her success.

I’m fiftay

Chanel and Stanbury’s lunch arrives. They order champagne, and Chanel offers her former foe a pineapple, because Stanbury’s prickly on the outside, yet sweet on the inside.

Naturally, Beyoncé comes up. Stanbury admits that Chanel won since her V.V.I.P. tickets let her party with Beyoncé’s mom. The conversation then switches to their “American tours” of colleges for their children. They’re on the same fearful page since keeping their children safe in America is a totally different ballgame than in Dubai.

Then, Chanel speaks about how Sara tarnished her name in the headlines. Caroline wants Chanel to get loud with Sara. Speaking of loud, after giving Stanbury some ageism grief in Season 1, turns out, Chanel might be older than Stanbury, as some new information from her past has just been learned.

Enter Taleen, and a knife

Brooks meets up with Taleen, and she invites her bestie to Lesa’s pool day, set for the following day. Taleen’s all in, but AGAIN, Beyoncé unknowingly enters the chat. Turns out, at the concert, Stanbury saw Taleen fall over, and she then commented on how Taleen likes to have fun. Both of these women are annoyed over Stanbury’s shade.

Finally, the whole cast gathers for Lesa’s pool day, where Sara brings up her healing journey. Chanel cries. She’s confused and hurt by Sara’s knife-in-the-back headlines. They take their conversation elsewhere so that Stanbury can enjoy her bread in peace.

They come back to the table, still pissed. Taleen suggests shots, as the credits roll on RHODubai Season 2, Episode 1.

Real Housewives of Dubai Season 2 continues every Sunday on Bravo at 9/8c.