With clients including Kim Kardashian, Chris Appleton has the world at his feet. But it wasn’t always the case. In fact, the celeb hairstylist recently revealed that he was once suicidal while trying to come to terms with his sexuality.
Chris Appleton struggled to come to terms with his sexuality
During an appearance on the Viall Files podcast, Chris spoke about his “darkest” time as he grappled with his sexual identity. He opened up about the start of his journey of self acceptance after a suicide attempt.
He said on the January 14 episode: “I don’t remember a lot. I was in the hospital for a while. I remember thinking to myself, ‘Well, I couldn’t hate myself anymore. I couldn’t try and run away from myself anymore. Couldn’t try and avoid who I was anymore.’ I was like, ‘What if I just surrender? What about if I just accept it?’ It was quiet. It wasn’t a loud moment, but I just kind of let go for the first time, I think, in my life.”
Chris, who was previously married to actor Lukas Gage, said it had taken him a while to come to terms with the fact that he’s gay. He explained: “When I was having sex, I wasn’t thinking of guys. I wasn’t watching gay porn. I wasn’t secretly meeting up with men. I was happy. I was doing my thing.”
Chris also revealed that the hardest thing about coming out for him was his concern over how it would effect his children. He said: “Kids can be really nasty. So I felt like I was bringing that pain to them. That broke me. I just was like, ‘It would be better if their dad was dead than if they had a gay dad.’ I genuinely believed that.”
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, help is available. Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, or visit 988lifeline.org.
