I love a Basketball Wives episode that starts back just a smidge before the previous one ended. VH1 wants to make sure we know how upset Evelyn Lozada is with Tasha Marbury and Suzie Ketcham for their insensitive giggling over head-butting jokes, but they don't take us back far enough to relive Tami Roman losing her cool over a hand gesture. Shaunie O'Neal just sits back with her puppet strings.
And just like that, Evelyn's tears fall like rain (again) and she exits the restaurant with the Puppet Master running after her friend. "Am I being dramatic?" Evelyn asks. Finally, a question we all want to answer.
Later, Evelyn is shooting the cover for Vibe Vixen, and she questions Tami as to whether she overreacted to Tasha's joke. Tami understands why her friend is upset and suggests that Evelyn have a talk with Tasha about her hurt feelings. She is actually proud of Evelyn as last season's variety would have thrown a drink (or a chair, or a shoe, or a wine bottle) at anyone who looked at her the wrong way. I guess we all just pretend that Tami didn't just pop off on Evelyn during lunch for a misplaced hand. Okay, I'll play that game.
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The two women go for a walk and talk about their newfound calling: life savers. It seems that "some woman" sent Shaunie "an e-mail" detailing how watching Tami and Evelyn get mammograms last season "saved her life." Not shockingly, they chat more about how much "just living their lives" in the public eye impacts the common folks. Who would have thought them getting topless and making crass jokes during a breast exam would make the world a better place? But it clearly has. And we should all be thankful and forget everything else. They can't wait to meet this woman "who found inspiration between the craziness" and hear more about how they saved her life.
Suzie and Evelyn are meeting for lunch, and Evelyn wants to get Suzie's take on Tasha's comments. This isn't Suzie's first ride on this roller coaster, and she's learned where her alliances need to be–mean girls. Suzie does her best to gloss over her participation in the inappropriate jokes, and she vows to be more sensitive to Evelyn's feelings in the future. Cue Evelyn's waterworks. Evelyn's wine remains in her glass and she doesn't raise her voice. It's a win/win for Suzie.
That evening, Evelyn, Tami, and Shaunie are meeting with Michelle who shares her story of breast cancer. She had suffered from a burning feeling in her breast, and watching Tami and Evelyn get a mammogram was the catalyst for her to see her doctor. Her appointment lead to early detection, and her doctors were able to treat her. Tami urges Michelle to continue to keep the women in the loop on her health, and Evelyn thanks her for being an inspiration to them. Shaunie, of course, just sits smugly. Her show saves lives.
Evelyn is taking Tami's advice to meet with Tasha and get everything out in the open regarding Tasha's insensitive jokes. Tasha tries to explain her sense of humor, and she promises never to do it again. Evelyn reminds Tasha that she doesn't entertain Suzie when she jokes about Tasha's husband hooking up with their chef. Tasha is fully aware that Evelyn doesn't joke about Stephon's infidelities among friends…she just wrote about it without so much as a head's up in her bestselling book. Even Stevens?
It's time for Tasha's weave bar opening, and Shaunie and Tami arrive to "support" their new co-star. Shaunie is appalled to learn the location is in a "rougher" part of town, and Tami makes a loud and abrasive entrance judging everything. Poor Evelyn (I can't believe I just typed that) is mortified when she discovers a typo on the awning outside the salon. Tasha arrives, and she admits that there are a lot of things about the space that have yet to be completed. Tami questions her about the signage error, and Tasha waves it off with a "we'll fix it later." Admittedly, she knows zip, zero, zilch about weave, and Tami wonders why she would choose to invest in a weave bar? Evelyn is curious as to why someone would have a grand opening for something that isn't ready.
Tami has a laundry list of legitimate questions for Tasha, although her delivery, in true Tami fashion, is incredibly abrasive. Tasha is very defensive, but thankfully the women are interrupted by Big Diva who is introduced by Tasha's public relations person as the weave bar's mascot. Big Diva is going to haunt my nightmares. Big Diva looks like Dora the Explorer grew up and made some very poor decisions. I don't even know what else to say.
It's the night of Tasha's birthday party, and Suzie joins her in her hotel room to grill her on all the drama surrounding the group. I'll hand it to Suzie, she never strays from her double-talking shiz stirring ways. Tasha isn't concerned about any residual beef with Evelyn over the head-butting comment, and, despite Tami's brash behavior at the weave bar, Tasha really likes her and thinks they have similar personalities. On cue, Tami calls to regret to the party because her eyes are "all jacked up." Tami warns Tasha that there may be asbestos in the walls of the weave bar. Tasha doesn't take kindly to Tami's insinuation, but she keeps her cool and tells Tami that they will have to celebrate at another time. Suzie also never disappoints in the air head category. What's asbestos?
Shaunie and Evelyn arrive to the party on time, and they are met with crickets and tumbleweeds. Suzie meets them with a big ol' bag of sex toys in tow. She fills them in on Tami's asbestos eye issue, and they all giggle and backhandedly comment on the weave bar in general. The women start complaining about their early flights, and they hightail it out of the party around 8:15. Rude. Tasha makes her grand entrance, and she looks stunning in her dress and jewelry. Unfortunately, someone convinced her to wear the abominable snowman's boots. She's hurt and pissed that her friends are no-shows, and the dildorama birthday present is no consolation.
Next week, Tasha confronts the ladies about leaving the party, and Tami counsels Suzie in how to be more confrontational.
TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT'S EPISODE? DOES TASHA KNOW HOW TO THROW A LEGIT PARTY/GRAND OPENING OR IS EVERYTHING JUST HALFWAY?
[Photo Credit: VH1]