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Bachelor Pad

Bachelor Pad is back. Last week’s premiere mainly brought us super fan angst and a drunken Ed Swiderski

Tonight’s episode features the never-ending fighting between the super fan twins Brittany and Erica Taltos, a rhythmic gymnastics challenge, Ed‘s pickles, and a surprising rose ceremony.

Are these blonde twins for real? Their voices and fights are mind numbing.

“Stop yelling at me,” says one. “You called me a slut,” says the other.

“Stop yelling at me!”

“You did it. I cried. You did it again. I cried again. You did it againnn. I cried againnn.”

“Stop yelling at me! I’m sorry I called you a slut. I won’t do it again, okay? I wouldn’t have said it if I were sober.”

I have no clue which one is Erica and which one is Brittany. The others are saying how annoying the twins are and that they’re walking episodes of the Jerry Springer show. It’s a sad day in your life when the Bachelor Pad contestants are making fun of you.

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Oh, Bachelor Pad, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways… right after I grab a loofah and scrub off the germs. I swear, just watching this show puts us all at risk of venereal diseases. Bachelor Pad 3 is summer TV at its finest, isn’t it?

As Chris Harrison welcomes us, I realize this puts me at five hours of Chris Harrison for the week. What has my life come to? Perhaps I can find some old reruns of Designer’s Challenge on HGTV just for fun. Thankfully, Chris shifts his focus from true love forever to smutty and disgusting seamlessly, so no time is wasted. Let the train wreck begin!

First, ABC reminds us who some of these Bachelor and Bachelorette losers are.

First, Emily Maynard‘s final four castaway, Chris Bukowski. Chris sits on his leather couch, wearing a jacket and shoes, reflecting on his heartbreak. Are we supposed to believe this is the exact minute Emily kicked him away? Chris “knows” going on the Bachelor Pad will help him move on from Emily. He mentions falling in love, also. He’s funny. Chris is looking forward to meeting Lindzi Cox.

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Season 3 of Bachelor Pad premieres very soon! Thrown into the mix of Bachelor and Bachelorette losers (and, ugh, super fans) this season is fan favorite Kalon McMahon. Kalon is the pretentious “luxury brand consultant” who offended Emily Maynard when he referred to her daughter Ricki as “baggage.”

Needless to say, Kalon’s journey on the Bachelorette did not end well. Kalon’s unapologetic ways and big personality, however, make him a perfect fit for Bachelor Pad. Something went right at the Pad, because Kalon agrees!  “I’m so glad I did Bachelor Pad. It was like night and day from Bachelorette. I had the most amazing time doing it, and I’m ready for fans to see me in a new light,” Kalon told Celebuzz.

When asked about his experience on Bachelorette, Kalon sings a much different tune. Kalon is not happy about the “bad boy” edit he received.

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So apparently hottie Roberto Martinez isn’t the new Bachelor…yet.   Chris Harrison spoke to RadarOnline.com to quiet the rumors that Roberto was a sealed deal for next season.

“I will confirm it, he’s not the Bachelor, we’ve not named anybody to be the Bachelor yet,” the show’s host tells the site.

“We don’t need to, we don’t name anybody so early,” Chris explains. “I love the speculation and that people are talking about our show but we just don’t need to make decisions yet.”

Don’t get him wrong, he loves Roberto.  He says, “He is a great guy, I love Roberto. First of all I hear he’s stunningly handsome, and he’s a very nice guy, he has a lot to offer and would be a great Bachelor. I would put my vote behind him but luckily I don’t have a vote.”

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It’s Bachelor Pad time, y’all! And ABC has finally released the cheesy bikini shots of the cast members who have given up their public quest for love and instead have decided to embark on a public quest for money. ABC is promising the most controversial season yet. That’s what they always say.

[Photo Credits: ABC.com]

Bachelor Pad 3 premiers July 23 at 8/7c on ABC.

ARE YOU EXCITED ABOUT BACHELOR PAD? THOUGHTS ON ADDING THE “SUPER FANS” TO THE LINE-UP?

MEET THE CAST OF BACHELOR PAD 3 BELOW! 

In a shocking Bachelor Pad twist, Holly Durst and Blake Julian not only fell in love on the show, but they actually got married!  Bachelor Pad is like a modern-day (read, classless and trashy) version of Circus of the Stars – it’s all fun and games of the (not so) famous. Bachelor Pad, compared to The Bachelorette, is less about romantic dates and amazing proposals and more about selling each other and yourself out to get to the cash prize.  Holly Durst, winner of season 2 of Bachelor Pad, got both – a romantic proposal and the cash prize.

Holly and Blake got married on June 2nd in South Carolina.  Holly talks to Cupid’s Pulse about the very special day and the honeymoon that followed.  Holly is settling right into her new life.  She says, “I’m so happy! I love married life. It’s just the best!”

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Bachelor Pad returns on July 23 on ABC!  Which The Bachelor and The Bachelorette rejects will get a second (third, fourth, fifth) chance at finding true love on reality TV?  Ha, only if you’re Holly Durst and Blake Julian.  More than likely, this ego-heavy cast is more interested in hooking up and collecting the cash prize of $250,000.  Not that there’s anything wrong with that.  I like my TV to be dirty and not too deep.

New twist this season – six hand-selected super fans of the franchise will join the Bachelor Pad fun.  Fresh meat!!

Perhaps one of the most self-absorbed contestants is none other than Emily Maynard‘s pariah Kalon McMahon.  Kalon, the luxury brand consultant whose preferred mode of transportation is a helicopter, got himself kicked to the curb this week after referring to Emily’s daughter as budget-basement baggage.  The comment brought out Emily’s West Virginia hood rat backwoods side, which is the most exciting thing to happen all season.  If Kalon can bring personality out of Emily, I’m all for his presence on the Bachelor Pad!

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Ladies, just when you thought you could quit The Bachelor after the mess that was the Ben Flajnik season, ABC throws this in: hottie Roberto Martinez is up for consideration for an upcoming season!

Roberto, who broke up with Ali Fetodowsky after being engaged to her for about two years is “definitely being considered” but a source tells People magazine that before you get too excited, they also want to see who Emily dumps on this season of The Bachelorette. But there’s no doubt a Roberto season would be a hit. “Obviously there’s a lot about Roberto that is appealing.”

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