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rhobh-recap

Last night on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills we got the answer to an important question: Who is Faye Resnick in this world? She is morally corrupt, desperate, ruthless, ill-mannered and really quite frankly a hot judgmental mess. Hey honey you got your camera time and you got to do it all while wearing a Barbie's Dream Collection seafoam Mother-of-the-bride inspired tacky-a$$ nightmare. No amount of borrowed David's Bridal will make you a lady!

I really wish I didn't have to discuss Fayded Retchnick at all on this blog because I don't want to give her any attention or satisfaction – which is exactly what people like her are looking for – but I suppose I have to. But before we are forced to contend with the horrible… 

Things begin with Lisa Vanderpump and Ken planning their vow renewal. Lisa is nervous and cute about a public display, but she knows it means a lot to Ken. And most endearingly after 30 years of marriage you can tell they truly do adore each other and are blissfully happy. 

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Should I be concerned that Love & Hip Hop is going soft of me?  Last night's episode was a veritable love fest with friendship, mended fences, and a long-awaited engagement.  What happened to the screaming and hair pulling and drink throwing?  Not that I'm complaining, it's just a foreign concept.

We begin as a frazzled Erica Mena meets with Yandy Smith to share that Olivia Longott is recording her ballad thanks to Rich Dollaz.  She can't believe that her ex-boyfriend would use that against her.  Yandy asks about what Erica wants to do with management.  Erica still wants to ignore the fact having a manager is important for her career.  Yandy reminds her that Rich was the only person in her corner…Erica needs Rich more than he needs her. 

Tahiry Jose's mom is in town and loves seeing her daughter's rap magazine centerfold.  Tahiry is excited that she and her mother finally have an adult friendship after a tense childhood.  They discuss their past, including how her father juggled his twelve kids before being deported.  Her trust issues do seem to come honestly, that's for sure.  The duo is crying over her father's indiscretions, and Tahiry thinks that many of her past issues have contributed to her problems with Joe Budden.  Her mother encourages Tahiry to talk things out with her dad.

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Last night on The Rachel Zoe Project, Rachel Zoe faced her critics, struggled with buyers over Maxi dress madness, continued her journey to actually understand what her husband does within her company and used a fur hat as fashion Xanax.

The episode starts in New York on the terrace; Rachel and Rodger are having a breakfast whilst basking in the glory of her successful show. Rachel starts complaining she hasn’t slept in like 3-4 weeks because she has been so stressed about her show. Rachel may have forgotten that most moms also suffer from a lack of sleep, it’s not just something for fashion designing moms.  Rachel is procrastinating reading her reviews, and after some encouragement from Rodger she takes the plunge. She is pleased with the response and annoyed at her husband’s Goosebumps.

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bethenny

Well isn't this a fun twist?  But aren't all the twists tongue in cheek fun when discussing reality star Bethenny Frankel?

If you recall, before she and Jason Hoppy filed for divorce, Bethenny was all about racing out to L.A. to set down roots for her new daytime talk show.  It seems that Bethenny has recently had a change of heart, and she wants to film Bethenny in the city that made her a household name in the first place, thanks to Bravo.  A woman's allowed to change her mind, right?

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Now that's she's quit her day job, Adrienne Maloof is investing her efforts in various business ventures. There are hooves and tinsels and purses as plastic as her mug – and there is also Zing Vodka, endorsed by Chris Brown! 

The former Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star recently hosted a party for Zing and among the attendees were some familiar faces. None other than fellow-retired Housewife Camille Grammer and Bobby Trendy, who believes Taylor Armstrong is holding his couture hostage

Hopefully retired Housewife Splits Richards and her perpetual hanger-on of barnacle like proportions, Faye Retchnick, were also present. 

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liz kim

Oh good gracious.  Remember when photographer and personal friend of Elizabeth Taylor, Robert Weber compared the iconic movie star to Kim Kardashian?  Yeah, I still don't believe it either. However, it would explain the picture that Kris Jenner just posted to Instagram of her daughter with the caption "Wow #stunning".  I will say the majority of the comments weren't very complimentary, but I think anyone is going to get the same treatment if they start comparing themselves to such huge celebrity from Hollywood's golden era.  Just ask Lindsay Lohan!

Of course, when Kim isn't trying to forge a resemblance between herself and Liz, she's reminding us that she's pregnant…just in case any of you thought this was a misguided and awful publicity stunt.  Surely no one is alleging Kim would do something so low, right?  ;)

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This isn't your everyday train wreck. Watching Big Rich Atlanta is like watching a circus train derail. And I love every second of it.

Virginia Kolb is mortified to learn that her daughters, Harvin Eadon and Meyer Eadon, left Marcia Marchman's Halloween party through a window. 

What every mother wants to hear during breakfast, err, lunch time: Mom, rather than leave last night's party like civilized beings, we jumped out a window. Actually, we were so drunk, we kind of just fell out. (paraphrased)
 
What Virginia fears she'll see in the town's gossip column: "Inebriated Broke Down Baby Dolls Fall Out Window" or "Mama Goose's Daughters: Drunk And Out Of Control"
 
What Harvin and Meyer (probably) often hear during breakfast, err, lunch time: I hope nobody saw you do that. 
 
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