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ZMOG! Teresa Giudice sucks and Melissa Gorga is the most beautifulest, amazing, fantastic person in all the world. Thank you Jesus for bringing her into our lives via Real Housewives of New Jersey. Just Kidding. They both annoy me.

But that's for all of you tireless crusaders who constantly harangue me with your belief that I'm secretly the president of the Teresa fan club and are immune to any sort of reason or logic called reading that may clear up that misconception. 

Anyway, back to the daily vomit of Jersey. So, Teresa's marriage is all about the business of the media these days ever since Joe Giudice's cheating became a storyline. The National Enquirer (which is surprisingly not so unbelievable) reports that Juicy's latest mistress has been discovered. I know – I couldn't believe he was cheating with Caroline Manzo either! 

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Bachelor couple Jason Mesnick and Molly Malaney Mesnick are breaking up (oops, habit!) expecting their first baby!

There aren't too many Bachelor success stories to be told, but Jason and Molly are one of the few couples who beat the odds. Sure, Jason initially proposed to Melissa Rycroft. He later had doubts and reunited with Molly. Jason and Molly are happy. Melissa and her husband Tye are happy. So… does it really matter now? Absolutely not. 

Jason and Molly faced some extremely harsh criticism following their reunion, yet they managed to remain together. Jason and Molly wed in February 2010. They should write an e-book or something, How to Survive The Bachelor Media S**t Storm For Dummies. I digress. Baby news! “Our family is getting a little bit bigger!” Molly revealed to People magazine. “I’m into my second trimester and I feel really good.”

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Since former Real Housewives of New York star Jill Zarin is getting some press over her upcoming appearance on Watch What Happens Live, she figured she should milk it for all it's worth!

Jill is going to sit down with Andy Cohen on Monday to finally hash things out about why she was fired from the show last September.  So, in the spirit of famewhoring, she invited a paparazzo inside Zarin Fabrics yesterday for a little "improptu" photo shoot.

Happy Friday. 

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR THE PHOTO GALLERY!

Last week it emerged that Real Housewives of Miami star Alexia Echevarria's son Peter Rosello posted a disturbing and disgusting video of himself punching a homeless man in the genitals to his Facebook page. 

Yesterday, Peter finally surrendered and was arrested. The twenty-year-old was arraigned in Miami-Dade County Jail yesterday afternoon on one count felony battery.

His attorney, Richard Sharpstein told the Miami Herald, “He’ll be pleading not guilty. We’ll present the best defense possible.” 

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Oh Basketball Wives and Basketball Wives L.A., what would we do without you?  From the ridiculous to the boring to the lunch meet-ups to the over-the-top crazy personalities, you both run the gamut.  Here's a little dose of some BBW and BBW LA news to quench your thirst for some daily trash!  I kid, I kid…for once news about these ladies (the originals, especially!) is relatively tame!

First up, Evelyn Lozada is a busy little beeotch!  Not only has her private marital dramas played out in the public eye, she is working on several projects.  I'm guessing she's trying to stay busy to keep her mind off of all her issues with soon-to-be-ex-husband Chad Ochocinco Johnson.  We certainly can't blame her for that now, can we?

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Many Dancing with the Stars fans expected Bristol Palin (and maybe even Kirstie Alley) to fall victim to this week's All Stars double elimination – did you? Were you shocked when Drew Lachey and Helio Castroneves, two former champions, were eliminated instead? If so, you're not alone. 

However, nobody is more shocked than Drew himself, and he isn't being shy about it. While Drew says he appreciates the "unpredictability" of Dancing with the Stars, he also believes his exit from All Stars is a little "odd." Drew explains, "I take pride in being a performer, and to me it's ironic that the two Broadway performers – me and Joey [Fatone] – are gone already. It's a little odd to me."

Drew whines, "It sucks!" 

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The Situation has found himself in many, many situations involving pussy. One could say he lives in a world of pussy galore. But his newest ad for the animal rights group, PETA has him surrounded by a whole nother type of pussy – and there's no smoosh room in sight! 

The Jersey Shore star has decided to use his fame for activism, which is a lot more productive than most of his extracurricular activities. In the new ad, Mike gives some advice he's very familar with. "Too much pussy can be a bad thing," the ad reads, serving as a reminder to spay and neuter your pets. 

“It was important for me to partner with PETA to raise awareness about the homeless animal crisis because so many dogs and cats must be euthanized each year because there aren’t enough good homes for them all,” Mike shares of his decision to particpate in the ad.

CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR THE NSFW AD & VIDEO! 

I know most people won't agree with me, but I like Heather Dubrow.  I daresay, she's my favorite of the ladies of Real Housewives of Orange County.  However, girlfriend needs to stop giving interviews that reference Alexis Bellino.  It's unbecoming.  This time around, she seems to be burying the hatchet, but still.  I can't wait until I can write about one of these women in one of the many franchises and actually use the phrase "took the high road."  A girl can dream, can't she?

This time around, Heather is discussing her time on the show, as well as her hesitation to join the cast.  She touches on the breakdown between Vicki Gunvalson and Tamra Barney's friendship and her disdain at the term "bullying" being thrown about in situations where it may not apply.  I'm not going to touch that comment with a ten-foot pole!

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