Billy Joel’s “New York State of Mind” has basically been my anthem while anxiously awaiting Real Housewives of New York. Well guess, what? They’re back with all the camel toe, cultural appropriation, and drunken drama we’ve come to expect from these Upper East Siders. Throw in Luann de Lesseps’ recent shenanigans, and it’s a cocktail Carrie Bradshaw herself would endorse.
Ramona Singer is drinking coffee from a mug that reads, “Keep Calm…Take a Xanax.” If there was ever a more appropriate opening scene for any season premiere of a housewives franchise, this is it. The women are readying for a day in the Big Apple, with Carole Radziwill running through Manhattan and Tinsley Mortimer failing to potty train her mini-dog. Dorinda Medley is razor focused on planning a massive Halloween party. The theme is “Famous People: Dead or Alive” and Dorinda is channeling her inner Gaga. Unfortunately for Dorinda, she didn’t read the fine print on her Amazon order, and instead of the infamous Lady Gaga bubble dress, she received a box full of clear plastic orbs. She should store them for a future crafting sesh. Decorated with holly and scary Santas, they’d make the perfect addition to her Berkshires Yuletide menagerie. Of course, if you’re a RHONY, you’ve got a costume designer who works at SNL on speed dial who is willing to help out for a name drop. Done and done.