Sister Wives

sister wives

Blah, blah, mission statement, yada, yada, yada commitment ceremony. Give me something to work with, Browns! Last night's Sister Wives was more of the same as the family prepped for their big party. The yards of the cul-de-sac compound are almost complete, so that's one thing they can check off their list, but what about dresses for the wives and the actual mission statement itself? Kody jokes that with four wives it's easier to make decision because it's like he has a committee to get things done. Christine recognizes that in a monogamous relationship there is no tie-breaker. It's so profound. 

One of Janelle's friend's daughter has just graduated from school with a degree in fashion design, and she's volunteered to create four custom dresses. Each wife has a vision for her dress because, you know, they're "fashion designers" in addition to being "jewelry designers." Not surprisingly, Meri is asking a ton of questions and has countless opinions. She wants edgy, not elegant. No worries there! Janelle admits that she has warned Sam the designer about how picky particular Meri can be. I guess we're not the only ones still harping on her need for a wet bar!

Kody and his wives are meeting with their family therapist to get assistance with their mission statement. Christine fancies herself quite the writer, although her wife counterparts aren't too sure. Robyn gets choked up every time they read over it. Of course she does. She's mainly concerned with how the completed mission statements will be displayed. Somebody call Cracker Barrel to get some ideas! Kody wants the statement immortalized on canvas and signed by all the wives. Janelle is worried that putting it on canvas could be limiting if Kody gets another wife. While she doesn't foresee Kody getting another wife, they didn't foresee Robyn coming either. Ouch. Kody thinks he's pretty much done with wives. Meri is worried that once the the mission statement is completed and the commitment ceremony is over, the family will sink back into dysfunction. Kody wishes Meri wouldn't be such a Debbie Downer all the time.  Amen.

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kandi-burruss

The reality TV viewer numbers are in – and the Real Housewives of Atlanta won the week with 4.638 million viewers tuning in to see the end of the pajama party brawl.  That's a season and a series high for RHOA and a franchise high for Bravo.  Also on Sunday, Keeping Up with the Kardashians managed 2.372 million fans. And Sister Wives lost almost 500K viewers, with only 1.943 million watching this week's tragedy filled episode

On Monday,  an impressive 3.519 million fans tuned in for part two of the Love & Hip Hop reunion, bringing its season average to 3.07 million. Vanderpump Rules outperformed Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Again. 2.243 million caught part one of the Pump Rules reunion and 1.918 million watched Kyle and Brandi plot against Lisa on RHOBH.

On Tuesday, the season 3 finale of Shahs of Sunset attracted 1.374 million, and a fight between Abby and Kelly resulted in 2.508 million viewers for Dance Moms. Also, Teen Mom 2 logged only 2.068 million viewers this week, but it is still the top original cable broadcast on Tuesday nights. 

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This week's reality TV viewer numbers are in – and we have some winners and some losers. The biggest loser, Keeping Up with the Kardashians, attracted just 1.727 million viewers this week. Catch a clue, Kris Jenner. We're OVER it. This week's winner?  Clearly baby Dylan!  Isn't he the cutest thing ever?  His show, Real Housewives of Atlanta, scored over 3.9 million viewers thanks to the much anticipated pajama party brawl.

The Sister Wives are totally winning. They're able to run their fingers through Kody's luscious locks every four days – AND a whopping 2.415 million tuned in this week.  That's nearly a million more viewers than last week!  Kris Jenner becomes wife number five in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…

Moving on to Monday,  Love & Hip Hop lost almost 400,000 viewers,  while Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Vanderpump Rules saw increases this week. 1.951 million sat through a raunchy pool party on RHOBH and 1.874 million couldn't resist a bitch slap on Pump Rules. Believe it or not, ratings wise, Vanderpump Rules has outshined RHOBH two weeks in a row now.

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sister wives truely

Last night's Sister Wives once again showed us what a stand-up guy Kody Brown is. Not only does he have those luscious locks, but he's Father of the Year up in here! The episode was quite the downer as he and Christine's daughter was admitted to the emergency room with kidney failure. Thankfully, the little girl is much better now.

Kody and his wives are preparing for their commitment ceremony by buying a ton of flowers for their party. No one is more shocked than Janelle that she's actually looking forward to this celebration. Apparently, all the wives like calla lilies. It's really the only thing they all agree upon…well flowers and Kody. They plan to put a tree on each table as a center piece. Robyn is thrilled by their "Tree of Life" theme. Christine is super excited that the commitment ceremony will also highlight her freakin' family mission statement. Next, the brood moves on to cake tasting. Kody wants to design the cake to look like (drum roll, please!) a tree, and it will only cost the family $8,500, or a semester of college for one of their umpteen kids. Poor Kody mopes about what could have been with his dream confection. 

Mariah is heading off to college, so I am sure there will be a lot of tears. As she packs for her adventure, Meri informs the camera crew that she and Kody are going to surprise Mariah with a car, and they will be throwing her a joint going-away/birthday party. How many parties do these people need to have? How much money do they need to spend? Meanwhile, Christine is taking Truely to the pediatrician because she's lethargic and cross-eyed. The doctor sends Christine directly to the emergency room fearful that Truely is suffering from kidney failure. Kody is napping (spending money you don't have is exhausting, y'all!), and Robyn goes to wake him with the news. Kody speeds off to the hospital in his midlife crisis car. 

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It's time to see who watched what this week. 

On Sunday, Real Housewives of Atlanta logged 3.695 million viewers. That's down from last week's 4.187 million but enough to make RHOA the top cable telecast (ratings wise) of the night.  Not at the top?  Keeping Up with the Kardashians! Season nine premiered to 2.569 million on Sunday and 2.142 on Monday. Ouch! Sister Wives saw a significant drop (2.0 to 1.44) this week.

Love & Hip Hop won Monday night with 3.447 million fans tuning in, which is a new season high. Holding somewhat steady are Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (1.786) and Vanderpump Rules (1.538).  

On Tuesday, Teen Mom 2 returned for its fifth season, to the dismay of many Reality Tea readers. However the show garnered 2.756 million viewers and was the top cable telecast (ratings wise) of the night.   Also, Dance Moms was watched by 2.010 million, and Shahs of Sunset saw its second lowest number of the season with 1.054 million.

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sister-wives-recap

This is my first experience discussing the atrocity that is Kody Brown's hair. Why are there no cameras in his bathroom detailing how he achieves such a paragon of 80's greatness. Kody missed his calling by not going into figure skating because the twirl potential of those locks is epic. 

This week the Sister Wives took a quad-only trip to San Francisco to bond sans Kody, who is really the reason no one gets along. Meanwhile Kody stayed home to burn down the fort and show his paternal ineptitude to the world. 

Things start out with Janelle running a 5K, which I hope translates into eventually running away from Kody. To support her, Kody runs with her – well actually he runs far ahead of her. Robyn, of course, is pimping t-shirts to go along with the race that feature the word "Be:" followed by a bunch of adjectives of what someone could be. Polygamous is not on the list, but the design does feature an exploding heart. Ummm… 

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rhoa-recap-porsha

The reality TV viewer numbers are in – and Real Housewives of Atlanta wins again. 4.187 million viewers (compared to last week's record breaking 4.519) tuned in this week. For Love & Hip Hop, 3.112 million watched Joe propose to Tahiry, which is up from last week's 2.889.

The other reality shows are holding steady.  Sister Wives garnered 2 million viewers on Sunday. On Monday, 1.804 million viewers witnessed Brandi and Carlton's drunken pole dancing on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and 1.446 million watched Kristen get ridiculously drunk on Vanderpump Rules.

On Tuesday, 1.20 million viewers went to the Del Mar races with the Shahs of Sunset crowd, and 2.004 million fans tuned in to see the Dance Moms stress over Abby's first open audition.

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sister wives aspyn mariah

On last night's Sister Wives, Kody Brown saw two daughters graduate from high school. While Christine was overjoyed for daughter Aspyn, Meri continued to meltdown over Mariah leaving the nest. Poor Janelle, she really wants to high tail it, doesn't she? Even Robyn raises some eyebrows by inviting a fortune teller to the girls' graduation party. Her prediction? One more wife! Oh gracious!

The episode begins with Christine, Meri, and their daughters plan the graduation party. The girls think the moms are living vicariously through them since they never had graduation parties. Mariah and Aspyn are opposed to dancing and DJs. Meri thinks that the girls must be embarrassed by their parents' dancing skills. The only idea that sounds remotely appealing is Robyn's palm reader. I do love that the girls' are cussing in front of their moms. Mariah says "hell no" to a slide show. Kody then discusses, yet again, how much more expensive Mariah's college education will be. If I were Mariah, I'd ask my folks to put the money they planned to spend on the party towards my education. He invites Mariah's study skills teacher over to talk about financial planning. Kody does not want any of his kids graduating with student loan debt, and he isn't going to be cosigning diddly squat. Slowly but surely, Kody realizes that loans would allow his kids to study and progress without worrying about working three jobs every semester. Take it from me, it's much easier to worry about that debt after graduation. Oh, sarcasm!

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