“Do not let her win this time. You win by doing nothing.” – Caroline Manzo (Episode 9)

“She got exactly what she wanted. She wanted everybody to say, ‘See, mean girls. You see the mean girls? You see what I have to deal with?’ And you gave it her.” – Caroline Manzo (Episode 10)

The fight club scene of the Real Housewives of New Jersey aired last night and it definitely lived up to the hype. Perhaps this episode was a gift from Bravo, you know, for putting us through one of the most boring seasons ever of a housewives franchise.

I started watching the episode just ready to feel sorry for Danielle. I mean I just knew I would end up feeling sorry for Danielle, who after all was going to be attacked, oops I mean assaulted, by Ashley Holmes, but within the first 10 minutes of watching the show, I quickly realized that would not be the case. The reason? Well you’re just going to have to read the recap 🙂

So the episode begins where Bravo left off 2 weeks ago, with the Danielle and Teresa conversation turned confrontation. I tried to give Teresa the benefit of the doubt two weeks ago, thinking she perhaps meant well in trying to talk to Danielle. But after watching the events that unfolded, it’s pretty clear Teresa’s intentions were to stir things up. Even Teresa herself admitted on WWH last night that Danielle had been going around town spreading rumors about her, and she intended to confront Danielle about those rumors.

The confrontation continues and evidently in New Jersey, Paterson to be exact, “Don’t call me honey,” are fighting words. Watching this scene made me see Teresa is a whole new different light. I always knew she wasn’t the brightest bulb of the bunch, but her behavior made her appear extremely immature and downright moronic. The excessive head twisting and “Don’t forget girlfriend, I’m from Paterson,” comment was beyond ridic! Is this woman serious? Surely she jests.

Things take a turn for the worse when Danielle uses the F word. In case you’re wondering, the F word stands for Foreclosure, at least when it comes to the housewives of Bravo. Danielle, perhaps referring to the foreclosure story that came out about the Giudices last year, tells Teresa her home is in foreclosure, and boy o boy, did she unleash the kraken! The truth foreclosure comment hit a major nerve with Teresa, and Danielle decides to start running for some odd reason. Really, why is Danielle running? Teresa, being the Paterson badass that she is decides to chase after Danielle.

Back to the foreclosure story. Danielle was actually correct, well sorta. A story came out last October stating Teresa and Joe’s home was in foreclosure. It however turned out the foreclosure was for a property they owned and not for their mansion. What’s even more interesting? Well according to police documents, this “fight scene” actually took place on November 11th. Just 2 weeks after Teresa and Joe filed for bankruptcy on October 29th. This might explain why Teresa went nuts with the comment. You know what they say, the truth hurts. This also makes me think the whole housewarming party took place sometime after the bankruptcy filing, yet before the Kim D fashion show, which if true, is quite unbelievable.

Now back to the show. I was certain I was going to feel sorry for Danielle because Teresa was the aggressor and instigator this go around. However, her over the top acting, antics, and just all around hysterics were extremely ridiculous. I mean seriously Danielle? When you think about it, there wasn’t a change in Danielle’s behavior and reaction before and after being attacked by Ashley. Teresa decides to pick an argument and that means she needed to take off running? I ask again, why was she running? She even had a bodyguard with her. Teresa and Jacqueline never touched her, so why the hysterics?

Well I’ll tell you why. Danielle is a perpetual victim who relishes in playing the victim role. Some people aim to be survivors while others accept the victim role, and get very comfortable in it. Danielle is the later. And speaking of roles, did you know Danielle has an acting background? Yes, years before embarking on a porn career, Danielle was an actress and even had a tiny role on the ABC soap – All My Children. Caroline said it best when she later told Teresa and Jacqueline, “She got exactly what she wanted. She wanted everybody to say, ‘See, mean girls. You see the mean girls? You see what I have to deal with?’ And you gave it her.”

The best part of the show comes in the form of the random blonde lady for yelling out, “This is such f*cking bullsh*t,” right into the cameras. Someone please get this woman a reality show asap!

Danielle is now outside and hysterically crying because having a co-star and former friend yell at you during an argument calls for hysterical crying. The third best part of the show comes when Kim G. tries to calm Danielle by yelling at her, “Calm down!” All that was missing from this scene was a calming slap across the face ala Airplane.


Next we see Ashley standing on the sidelines, plotting on how to involve herself in the grown up mess drama that is going on. Out of nowhere, Ashley walks up to Danielle and pulls her hair for what seems like half a millisecond. From reading about this incident for the past eight months, I was really expecting something of a more violent caliber. The hair pulling by Ashley was very timid and I absolutely doubt pulled out any of Danielle’s real hair or extensions. Jacqueline stated on WWH last night that the extension Danielle was showing everyone days after the attack was fake and not pulled out by Ashley. I think I believe Jacqueline.

To be completely clear, I am in no means defending Ashley’s actions in any way, shape or form. Ashley was absolutely 100% wrong. You never put your hands on anyone for any reason at all. Danielle absolutely did the right thing in getting the cops involved, and I also think the punishment given to Ashley by the law, to pay fees and fines, absolutely fit the crime. I believe the cops did the right thing by not arresting Ashley.

I’m also not buying Ashley’s claims that she attacked Danielle in an attempt to defend Jacqueline. While I believe Ashley might have heard or thought Danielle attacked her mom, I do believe she attacked Danielle out of her own personal vendetta. Plus shouldn’t Ashley’s first instincts have been to go check on her mom to make sure she’s okay before going after Danielle? But more on Ashley later.

We then get to see a still very emotionally wounded Danielle in her interview as she recalls the events of that night. Did this interview take place right after the fight? or days later? Is Danielle really that wounded by what took place that she still looks disheveled and is still in tears about it? She is even shown later walking off during the interview. Must say, Danielle should have stuck with acting. She has a gift.

The cops arrive and do not arrest Ashley. Jacqueline says some of the cops told her they are very familiar with Danielle and her Oscar worthy victim role. Jacqueline and Teresa recount the aftermath of the events to Caroline, while Dirty D fills up her ex-con rumored sex buddy Danny on the night’s events.

Caroline has some wise words for the ladies while Danny makes a rather interesting comment when he tells Danielle he would have been back in jail had he been with her at the event. Danny’s comment rubbed me the wrong way. Back in jail for what? For hitting women? because the only people involved in the altercation with Danielle were Ashley, Teresa and Jacqueline. So I’m really curious as to what Danny would have done had he been there. But then again knowing Danielle and judging from her comment about Teresa stabbing her had she had a knife, there’s a good chance Danny thought the entire situation was way more serious than what actually occurred, so I will give him the benefit of the doubt.

Teresa decides to fill in hubby Joe on the fashion show drama as well, and how priceless was Joe’s reaction when Teresa told him about Danielle’s foreclosure comment. The awkward silence that ensued said it all. As I posted earlier, this all took place just two weeks after the Giudices filed bankruptcy.

The second best part of the show comes when Danielle’s “energist” decides to call Jacqueline. My first reaction is WTF is an energist? Really guys? While I attributed an energist to being a rich people thing on twitter last night, a twitter follower had a different much funnier take, twitting that “an energist is a shrink for broke skanks.” The energist decides to try to channel some spirits or energies or light or something to Jacqueline through her phone, and we see Jacqueline playing a game on her iphone while pretending to go along with the energist’s channeling. “Do you think this is helping Danielle,” asks Jacqueline and at this point I am reminded of why Jacqueline continues to be my favorite NJ housewife.

And yeah, there were also some scenes about Albie‘s law school dilemma, but sorry Albie, your hotness will have to take a backseat to the current insanity going on in this episode.

We then see Jacqueline confronting daughter Ashley about her actions, and in this scene, I get a full understanding of why Ashley ended up the spoiled brat she is today. Ashley, being the immature 18-year-old she was at the time, sees Jacqueline’s scolding as taking Danielle’s side instead of hers.

Jacqueline then scolds Ashley for bragging about her stupid actions on facebook by posting that the fashion night was “unbeweavable,” which is of-course a reference to yanking on Danielle’s weave. Ashley however interrupts her mommy to let her and the millions of viewers watching know that Jacqueline is two-faced and had previously laughed about the “unbeweavable” comment, you know when the cameras weren’t around. Ashley wants to know why the sudden change of heart? Jacqueline appears dumbfounded, perhaps realizing she has just been busted for her crappy parenting.

Basically what Ashley is saying is when the cameras are turned off, Jacqueline finds humor in her actions, which were not only stupid but also against the law, but when the camera crew is in tow, Jacqueline all of a sudden wants to be a strict disciplinarian. While I highly doubt Jacqueline encouraged her daughter to post the comment on her facebook, I absolutely believe Ashley when she says Jacqueline laughed at the comment. This my folks, is probably why Ashley is the way she is today. Inconsistency in discipline and parenting will always result in having a brat for a daughter.

With that being said, I don’t think Ashley is that bad of a daughter or person. I really don’t. She does however have a lot of growing up to do, and Jacqueline still has a lot of parenting to do despite the fact that Ashley is over 18. I think there’s still hope for both mother and daughter. Chris enters the room and really unleashes a verbal lashing unto Ashley, and the episode is over.

Watch What Happens – WWH was pretty interesting last night. The best part was when Jacqueline decided to do her best Danielle impersonation by being all over Teresa, pretending to be to a faux lesbian, similar to what Danielle did with rumored girlfriend Lori Michaels when they both appeared on the show.. Jacqueline also stated that Danielle was also going back and forth with Ashley in emails before the fashion show fiasco. Must say I believe it judging from Danielle’s nasty comment during the fashion show, when she called Ashley a “coke whore.” Teresa appeared defensive when a caller called to ask her if her home was indeed in foreclosure. Teresa lied said her home has never been in foreclosure. Guess the property that was foreclosed on last year does not count. When Andy asked her about her debt, you know the $11 mil one, Teresa claimed it was more the debt of her husband and his ex-business partner. Will someone please tell Teresa the bankruptcy filing was a personal one and not a business filing? Meaning the $11 debt belongs to Teresa and Joe, and no one else.

Jacqueline also informed viewers that the reason Dina Manzo came out in the press last week with the story of Danielle’s attempt to get her daughter taken away from her, is because Danielle was trying to sell the story to the press. So Dina decided to beat her to the punch and do it on her own terms. I was honestly very puzzled and found it strange as to why Dina went public with the story. It just wasn’t Dina’s MO so Jacqueline’s explanation made a lot of sense.


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