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Little Women: LA Recap: Big Trouble, Little Video

Remember a certain video Kim Kardashian leaked back in the day to launch her dubious career? Well apparently, Christy McGinity Gibel made one of those videos too! Except with way less skin, no sex, and a decidedly lower market value. So when Terra Jole decides to bizarrely out this old footage of Christy on this week’s Little Women: LA, Christy is offended – and rightly so, especially when Terra vaguely presents it as some sort of threat if Christy doesn’t sign her book release. Meanwhile, Tonya Banks is not having the best luck, as her dog is stolen, which, on top of the massive meltdown Jasmine Sorge recently had on her, does not make for a great week in Little Boss’s world.

With Penny turning two, Terra and Joe Gnoffo are planning a big party. At home, they prep decorations as Tonya pops in to tell them her dog, Angel, is gone. She cries foul! Someone’s stolen her, says Tonya. But enough on that, as there’s party drama to discuss – drama between Tonya and Jasmine, that is. Tonya still doesn’t know what to do to make things right after Jasmine screamed in her face at her post-launch party. She apologized, so shouldn’t that be enough? As for Briana Renee’s beef with Tonya not including her in the fashion show, nobody cares.

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Speaking of Briana and Jasmine, they’re at the salon getting blowouts and licking their wounds. Briana, now an official model (in her estimation) discusses the photoshoot she took to send to Maxim. She shows Jasmine the shots, which are photoshopped within an inch of becoming a Sims character, and Briana isn’t happy. She feels like the entire thing was a waste of time.

Briana is also bummed about Terra accusing her of sidling up to her manager – something Briana still claims she never did. As of now, she and Terra are on okay terms, but she never knows when she’ll turn on her. Uh, Briana: Are you speaking about YOURSELF? Pot, meet kettle. She does know where she stands with Tonya though: in the reject pile! (Whether she’s been officially informed about her massive B.O. problem remains a mystery. And OMG – I can still not believe that sh*t.)

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Back at Terra’s, she tells Joe about her new working title for the memoir she’s writing: “How Not To Be A Midget.” Joe bristles at the idea, as did Terra’s publisher. She’s still waiting on the ladies signing releases for the book too, and figures that a two-year old’s birthday party is just the time and place to do it!

Okay – on to Terra’s next bright idea! In an effort to massively stir years-old poop, she shows Joe a video that Christy made back in 2012 in which she’s lip-syncing to a song about “midgets” – a derogatory slur that most of the little people community considers an outrage. Terra unearths the video from who the hell knows where…to do what, exactly? To prove that her book title is kosher? No, she claims. It’s more likely that she wants to prove that Christy is a horrible human being who hasn’t suffered enough under Terra’s crushing thumb. Plus, Christy questioned Terra’s involvement in a movie TEN YEARS AGO that had “midget” in its title – so there!

But here’s the real reason: Terra wants collateral to use in strong arming Christy into signing her book release. Plain and simple.

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(An aside for Lifetime: Hello there! It’s us, your faithful viewers who are hanging on by a very flimsy thread! Um, quick question: Are we seriously supposed to be invested in this trivial, stale, non-issue of a fight? Because I, personally, cannot summon a single f**k to give about this entire cluster. Let’s move it along, shall we?)

None the wiser about Terra’s evil plan, Christy goes boutique snooping with Tonya to check out other lines of active wear. Tonya’s line has launched online, but she may be interested in store sales as well. After Tonya inquires about selling her wares in the boutique, she dishes to Christy about her dog getting stolen – then getting her back after “offering a reward.” WTF!? She’s also exhausted with the Jasmine/Briana drama.

Christy has issues of her own, worrying about Todd’s upcoming gastric sleeve operation – and the complications that come with it. Tonya encourages her to be hopeful, although she tosses in some shade about a couple she knows who got divorced after one of them went through the same surgery. Ouch!

In other parts of LA, Elena Gant and Jasmine are checking out an Old Hollywood museum, where they discuss Jasmine’s hurt feelings over the fashion show. Elena doesn’t think Tonya had bad intentions, encouraging Jasmine to make amends with Tonya for the good of the order. This is rich coming from the woman who’s held a grudge so hardcore all season she’s practically turned herself inside out with resentment.

Before she crushes Christy’s skull like a walnut, Terra decides to meet with her for coffee. She presents her offer: She’s writing a book and wants to include stories from Christy’s past in which she was drunk and foolish. Christy doesn’t want her dirty laundry aired in the name of Terra making a buck though. So Terra pulls out the heavy artillery – she’s got a video! And she’s willing to use it against Christy if she doesn’t sign the release (or at least, that’s the subtext here). Christy is shocked that Terra’s hanging this video over her head out of literally nowhere.

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But will she sign the release? Christy doesn’t answer just yet because she has a plan of her own! She’s writing a book (someday) as well and wants to use her story of recovery – along with her troubled past – herself. So, will Terra sign HER release, should the time come? CHECK MATE, b*tch! Terra’s like, ummmmm…this is not in my master plan!!!! She offers no answer.

Home with the boys, Elena and Preston talk about what a dream being a stay at home mom is. As every stay at home mom knows, this is a loaded statement – and probably meant more to throw shade at Terra, in Elena’s case, than to brag about “living the dream” that we all know is periodically a nightmare! Elena and Preston do seem happy though, so more power to them.

At a juice bar, Jasmine and Christy shop for some healthy drinks for Todd, post-surgery. After they taste test some juices loaded into freaking horse syringes, they discuss Jasmine’s drama with Tonya. Christy fills Jasmine in on Tonya’s woes: The dog, her health (she’s on blood pressure meds), and her overall depressed state. Moving on to Terra, Christy tells Jasmine about not knowing whether she’ll sign the book release. Jasmine will sign hers, but she knows that Christy and Terra have a much more complicated history. No matter, for Christy is concerned about actual real life issues: She’s truly terrified about Todd’s surgery.

So when day of Todd’s surgery arrives, Christy cries that he’s the love of her life, hoping that Todd pulls through the operation in one piece. Until then, she’ll be a nervous wreck. She wants to live a long life with Todd, as he does with her. They trade I-love-you’s pre-op, then it’s up to the doctors to see Todd to the other side of this thing.

After a long wait, Christy finally hears the verdict: Good news! The doc tells her that everything went well, and despite Todd not being an “easy case,” he has a chance to be healthy now. He’ll lose a substantial amount of weight over time, but it will be a major lifestyle change for both of them. Christy is grateful and excited about the new life they have ahead of them.

It’s Penny’s birthday, and all of the animals are ready to entertain the kids. Oh – there’s also a petting zoo. (Ba dum DUM! :)) Tonya doesn’t exactly relish seeing Briana and Jasmine, but she’s not sweating it – even though she’s inexplicably dressed for a funeral. Terra decides that her book release is more important than getting into the celebration of her daughter’s big day, so she immediately accosts Briana about signing it as soon as she sees her. Briana wants Matt to read over the details first, but seems amicable to signing.

In another corner, Elena and Terra grill Tonya about whether she’ll confront Jasmine at the party. They frankly seem more invested in this drama than Tonya, who’s not planning on talking to Jasmine anytime soon. Obviously deflated that her child’s party will not devolve into a screeching embarrassment of grown women clawing each other’s eyes out, Terra all but pouts when Tonya doesn’t take the bait.

Adding to the peaceful vibe, Jasmine offers Tonya a sweet gift to say “sorry” for her outburst. In response, Tonya apologizes again – for real! – and the two hug it out in the name of genuine friendship. Cue Terra starting some new drama now in light of this absurdly mature behavior.

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And start drama, she does! By showing a free screening of Christy’s video to Jasmine, Elena, and Tonya after cake is served. After the ladies see the video, they’re shocked. But instead of asking questions about why Terra is showing this video here and now, and how she got her hands on it at this particular juncture, they all just sit, mouths agape at Christy’s crude antics. And they are crude, make no mistake. But none of it has anything to do with Terra. Unless she needs it for blackmail purposes, of course.

TELL US: IS TERRA THROWING CHRISTY UNDER THE BUS FOR THE SAKE OF HER BOOK? WILL CHRISTY’S VIDEO GET HER KICKED OUT OF THE GROUP AGAIN? 

Photo Credit: Lifetime

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