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90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Last night’s episode of 90 Day Fiance Before The 90 Days  had me shaking my head in disbelief. It’s like these people are gluttons for punishment. Where there is smoke, there is fire and the cast just keeps walking towards the flames. I can’t lie I find it interesting to see so many crazy naive people all at once.

Darcey Silva and Tom Brooks prepare to meet face to face. Geoffrey Paschel questions  Varya Malina and the entire trip to Moscow. David anxiously awaits his first meeting with Lana. Lisa Hamme faces Usman’s adoring fans at his music video premiere. Let’s get straight into the recap!

Geoffrey, 41 (Knoxville, Tenn.) & Varya, 30 (Russia)

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Geoffrey is devastated when he learns his suspicions about Varya may be true. He storms out of the restaurant after learning that she has indeed been talking to another American. Varya comes outside to plead with him to allow calmer heads to prevail. However, she does admit that she is currently talking to another American that she met on the same site as Geoffrey, but as just a friend. After further discussion, she also confesses they have also met in person. I actually think it’s hilarious Geoffrey expects so much transparency when he too is hiding secrets.

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Geoffrey calls his friend Mary, who is also in love with him, to update her on his trip. Mary loves hearing that things aren’t going well with Varya and uses that opportunity to advertise herself. Despite having another opportunity waiting at home, Geoffrey meets with Varya to hear her out. Sorry, Mary, he’s just not that into you!  Varya still maintains that she isn’t using Geoffrey.  But she is disappointed that he ruined his first time meeting her friends. He apologizes for his behavior and she decides to forgive him for jumping to conclusions. Personally, I think this relationship is doomed. They both are lying and using one another for different reasons.

Lisa, 52 (York, Pa.) & Usman “SojaBoy,” 30 (Nigeria)

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Lisa is still furious that she feels Usman allowed his friend to insult her. Omg… I don’t know how he can deal with this lady, even for a green card. She is extremely controlling and just obnoxious. How old are you? She is incapable of navigating situations without allowing her emotions to get the best of her. How could you be jealous of a woman hired to play a part in a video? She probably is the last person Lisa needs to worry about.

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

It’s the night of the video premier and I can’t wait for Lisa to ruin the big night. Usman shows up club ready, while she looks like she is about to chop wood in her backyard. During the video, Lisa looks like she was about to have an orgasm, just from being acknowledged in front of a crowd of strangers. The fans looked thoroughly confused by a video that only featured Usman alone.  He even continues showering Lisa with compliments, including that she is “a white beautiful woman from the United States.” Usman, you must really want this green card because that whole ordeal was over the top and embarrassing.

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Usman takes Lisa to his hometown to meet his mother in hopes of getting her blessing for their wedding. As soon as they arrive at the hotel, Lisa complains about everything from the room, shower and the bed. It’s so bad, Usman’s friend, Umar, who picked them up from the airport expresses his concern. Usman begins to doubt if he is making the right decision marrying Lisa. Ummm… all signs point to no.

Darcey, 45(Connecticut) & Tom, 39 (England)

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Tom texts Darcey to let her know that he has arrived in New York and he still hopes they can talk. Between seeing the pictures with him and another woman and the distance growing between them, Darcey doesn’t trust Tom’s intentions. Chile, Tom must have seen himself on previous seasons. He has lost a TON of weight but he still has a massive ego.

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Darcey arrives to meet with Tom looking like a mob wife with a renewed sense of purpose. She even declines a hug and kiss on the cheek from him when he attempts to greet her. Simply saying, “That’s okay, I don’t feel comfortable.”  Okay, Darcey! Let’s hope she can keep that same energy the whole conversation.

 

Ed, 54 (San Diego) & Rosemarie, 23 (Philippines)

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

It’s the morning after the disastrous dinner and Ed Brown is having regrets about the way he approached Rose. The two have not talked since he put her in a cab to go to another hotel, the night before. In a last ditch effort to save their relationship, he sends a text asking her to meet him at a cafe. Chile, please! Rose may be mad, but she isn’t going anywhere. Ed is her golden ticket for her family.

After waiting an hour and half, Rose finally shows up to meet Ed. The entire meeting he backtracks on everything he said at dinner. He no longer wants to hear about her past or wants her to take an STD test. Chile, please, trust only goes so far. If you are in a serious relationship, the other person has the right to ask about your past.

Stephanie, 29 (New York) & Erika, 24 (Australia).

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Stephanie Matto and Erika Owens have finally arrived at the hotel and there is definitely an awkward sexual tension in the air. Stephanie has been celibate for a long time and she is nervous about their first encounter. That all goes out the door when Stephanie and Erika share their first kiss. Although Stephanie wants to take things slow, she wants Erika to know she is attracted to her.

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

While taking Stephanie on a wildlife tour, Erika realizes the full extent of her illness. Stephanie expresses her fear that Erika won’t be able to handle everything that comes along with her. Erika reassures her that she will be there for her, although it does worry her. With the amount of medicine that Stephanie keeps flashing in the camera, I think anyone would be concerned.

David, 60 (Nevada) & Lana, 27 (Ukraine)

90 Day Fiancé Before The 90 Days Recap: Can’t Buy Me Love

Poor David still believes he will actually meet the woman who has ghosted him FOUR times over the past seven years. When he arrives at the train station he quickly realizes he is in over his head, when he can’t understand any of the arrival boards. With only one train arriving at the set time, David realizes that Lana has once again left him to look like a fool. What the heck did David expect?  Lana won’t even give him her phone number.  He can only speak to her on a PAID dating site! David, are you really that lonely. I’m sure there are plenty of sugar babies in America willing to take your money in exchange for companionship. He is probably speaking to a man in a basement that is older than him.

After being ditched at the train station, David finds an internet cafe so that he can try to find out what happened to Lana. Insert side eye here. Although he believed her excuses in the past, he seems to be angered by her not showing up this time. He vows to not leave Ukraine without answers.

David continues stalking Lana on the website to no avail. None of his desperate messages have been returned. He decides to meet with his friend Anya to get her perspective on the situation. Anya like everyone else is shocked that David still can’t see this woman isn’t serious about him. Not one to give up, David wants to drive to an address he believes is Lana’s. Anya is concerned because the city that Lana supposedly lives is near a war site.

 

TELL US- DO YOU THINK DAVID WILL GIVE UP ON LANA? IS USMAN AT HIS WITS END WITH LISA? DO YOU THINK DARCEY WILL JUST FALL BACK INTO THE SAME ROUTINE WITH TOM? DO YOU THINK ROSE GOT MAD BECAUSE ED DIDN’T TRUST HER OR BECAUSE SHE IS HIDING SOMETHING?

 

[Photo Credit: TLC]

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