Schwartz & Sandy’s Is a Mess: Boots On the Ground Report

Schwartz and Sandy
(Photo by Rich Polk/Bravo via Getty Images)

Warning: This review is going to feel more snarky than the experience actually was. I am a die-hard Bravo lover. I knew what I was getting into, hence why I went with my band of merry Bravo heads. I’ve been to TomTom. I’ve been to Pump. So naturally, I had to go where everyone clearly didn’t know my name: Schwartz & Sandy’s. 

First Impressions

@realityduchess/Instagram

Upon entering Schwartz and Sandy’s, which, let me tell you, is located in a really normal-looking shopping center in Franklin Village that also had a pizza shop, interior design store, dry cleaners, and a Mexican restaurant. After entering, I was greeted by a super sweet hostess who clearly wasn’t bothered that her place of work was a tourist trap. I could have bought myself a baseball cap from their glass merch cupboard on the left.

It was 5 p.m. on the Saturday of President’s Day weekend when I arrived, and it was not crowded—I didn’t even need a reservation. I will say I was struck by how many people were there on dates/just for dinner. But the majority of patrons were clearly fans because every time the door swung open, you could hear the collective sigh when neither Tom walked through the door. 

So my friends and I sat. And we sat and sat waiting for our drinks which took 16 minutes to get from the bar to our lips. “Do they even know that the Dutchess was in the house?” my friends and I light-heartedly quipped, referencing my IG handle as we slowly became one with the velvet booth that was against the famed wallpaper Tom Sandoval obsessed over for an entire season.

Listen, as my bartender friend pointed out, those types of drinks take time, and I get it. BUT, the bar was not crowded, and I couldn’t help but question if the bartender wasn’t just screwing around mainly because one drink (tequila on the rocks) was more rocks than the tequila by the time it got to us. 

Food & Drink

@schwartzandsandys/Instagram

Now to the orders. Our server informed us they were on a transitional menu. We all immediately wondered what they were transitioning from and why, as the place hadn’t been open that long. But that meant we only had a limited selection of cocktails to choose from. For drinks, our group got the Fresh Start, which was a vodka-based drink with green tea. I LOVED the cup it came in as it was decorated with leaves. Honestly, I wanted to snag one, but I behaved.

Next, we tried the Wendy Peppercorn, which was a Mezcal and pink peppercorn drink. This was my choice, and I was super pleased with how much I enjoyed it. Lastly, we ordered Arugal Awakening, which was made with gin and muddled arugula. I’ll be honest: this one wasn’t my top choice, but my friend really enjoyed the herbiness. 

As for the food, we ordered the shoestring fries with dark cherry tomato sauce. Now, I was already left confused since my spunky waitress made me think this was some out-of-this-world ketchup made from cherry, as in the fruit. Nope, it was the tomato (which is still a fruit obviously.) My two other friends had the Juicy Lucy Sliders. Now, the burgers were juicy, but sadly, we were told there were no buns left (we also were never given napkins!) Total bummer. However, on our departure, we bumped into the doorman, who was scarfing down an order of the sliders—with the buns the bar was supposedly out of.

The Verdict

@Schwartzandsandys/Instagram

Would I go back? Not right away and not without reason. But I can see why it is Mecca for Bravo tourists. I can appreciate they are pandering to the viewers. If you do go, make sure you go with a good group because mine laughed, chatted, and gossiped, which only enhanced the pretty great night I had at Schwartz & Sandy’s. I can’t emphasize enough how beautiful the interior was, though, and for that, it’s worth a stop. If either Tom extends an invite (or wants to send me that leaf glass) after this article, me and my merry band will happily give it a second chance. 

TELL US – WOULD YOU MAKE SCHWARTZ & SANDY’S YOUR WATERING HOLE?

X