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Raquel Leviss

Raquel Leviss Vanderpump Rules

I don’t know about you, but Lala Kent had me cringing during last night’s episode of Vanderpump Rules. She got together with Raquel Leviss for a peacemaking coffee sesh, which apparently did work, for a day, anyway.

From the footage we were shown, it was tough to understand why Raquel felt Lala’s “apology” was so meaningful. Raquel explained that she was upset that Lala called her “dumb” last season. And in response, Lala told Raquel, “My time is very precious and I wouldn’t waste it on someone who I felt was a true idiot.” How… heartwarming. Then, we saw Raquel tell Lala, “That means so much to me, Lala.” What? In what universe could that sentiment ever mean “so much” to someone. Clearly, some of the talk was edited out for time. Or to be shady, you be the judge. Regardless, I think most of us are #TeamRaquel on this one.

Vanderpump Rules Lala Kent

We celebrated Tom Sandoval‘s birthday on last night’s Vanderpump Rules and the theme was being extra. As if this group even has to try! Hey, at least it wasn’t more wedding nonsense.

Ugh – every time I reach a place where I kinda like Lala Kent, she goes and acts like a horrific ego-consuming monster whose such a bitch that I’m right back to wanting to smash cupcakes in her face. Super fattening, gluten-y, sugary cupcakes. Lala is a wench. A worse wench than Stassi Schroeder ever was in her Stasstrocious heyday. Lala is Jax Taylor bad. She’s also a dry drunk. Someone who has treated the symptom, not the disease. Lala reminds me of Kim Richards, formerly of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills, now of never-to-be-published salacious memoir because Kyle Richards will tie your ass up in cord for ad infinitum. Which is also how long it will take Lala to realize that she’s a horrible human being who is still secretly in love with James Kennedy.

Anyway, these are my preliminary thoughts on last night’s Vanderpump Rules.

Tom Sandoval Throws “Extra” Themed Birthday On Vanderpump Rules Tonight

We are finally done with Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright’s wedding, way too many episodes later. Especially when there are thousands of cast members on Vanderpump Rules.

Kristen Doute Vanderpump Rules

Kristen Doute’s storyline on this season of Vanderpump Rules revolves around her complicated dynamic with ex [Brian] Carter. However, he’s not Kristen’s only ex on the show. Remember when Kristen dated James Kennedy? That feels like a whole lifetime ago.

Now, James is dating Raquel Leviss, who he called a “whore” and a “slut” in recent episodes. Yet, she’s still living with him and dating him. In real time, James has been sober for nine months, and apparently, he’s made some major strides. But, we shall see how much he’s changed. In the mean time, their relationship is so tough to watch. And, Kristen shared her thoughts on James and Raquel’s relationship.

Vanderpump Rules Mid Season Trailer: Jax Taylor Questions Marrying Brittany Cartwright; Beau Clark Proposes To Stassi Schroeder

We are officially halfway through this season of Vanderpump Rules, and so far it has been feuds galore. We’ve had Dayna Kathan feuding with Scheana Marie over Max Boyens. Then Scheana tried to feud with Charli Burnett over Brett Caprioni. Which lead to a feud between Brett and Scheana because he didn’t want to come over for her famous enchiladas. Don’t you ever change, girl.

Stassi Schroeder and Katie Maloney have banished Kristen Doute from their coven because of her on again off again relationship with Brian Carter. Lala Kent and James Kennedy made up, but James’ relationship with Raquel Leviss is hanging by a thread. Tom Sandoval almost got “Jaxed” from Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright’s wedding for saying their heads were in the sand about their pastor. So, is the rest of the season this tumultuous, or does Lance Bass step in and save the day for everyone?

Brittany Cartwright Vanderpump Rules

Jax Taylor finally got married on last night’s Vanderpump Rules, metamorphosing from Jax to Jason. Even so Tom Sandoval was the true knight in shining armor. Tom had tampons, tissues, White Claw, vodka, an endless supply of giving and support. What did Jax have besides patchy sideburns and a mistaken understanding that getting married does not allow one legal ownership over your spouses breast implants.

Although how fantastic would it be if Brittany Cartwright threw the removed implants on the table at their inevitable divorce trial?! Which from the mid-season preview seems like it’s coming sooner rather than later. The shelf life of an implant is what – max, 10 years? The shelf life of a marriage to Jax Taylor has to be more like 2.2 years. Maybe 2.4 if there’s an extended separation. And probably more like 1.4 if Vanderpump Rules cameras turn off. Marriage Bootcamp only films for 5 weeks.

Anyhoodle, yes, Jax and Brittany finally finally finally made it down the aisle in the unrelenting sun of a Kentucky summer, leaving their guests to wilt and melt in 96 degree weather without any shade. Except for Tom 1 running around holding out parasols. Add that to his list of positives! After all this Jax only gives Tom 1 a B- or C in the best man performance grade.

Jax Taylor Brittany Cartwright Vanderpump Rules

We will finally be put out of our misery tonight! We finally get to see Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright get married on Vanderpump Rules tonight! This whole season has been leading up to this wedding and it’s finally here. Praise Mamaw.

Of course, their wedding will have some drama. Kristen Doute and her non-boyfriend [Brian] Carter get into a heated exchange at the reception and most likely end up hooking up after anyway. Stassi Schroeder starts to wonder if she and Beau Clark will ever get engaged. Spoiler alert: they will.

Dayna Kathan Vanderpump Rules

Suddenly I am interested in the new people on Vanderpump Rules. It’s because of the way the girls react to men treating them like dirt. Initially I was like Dayna Kathan will not last long on this show if she’s dumping Max Boyens at the first whiff of a cheating scandal, because the very basis of this show is the girls (and Tom Sandoval) learning that for months their sigfig has been lying to them and cheating.

I mean, every season without fail there has been a cheating mess involving one of the guys doing the dirty and one of the girls forgiving him after lots of tearful remonstrations and emotional drunk-fests.

Like here we are on the forever precipice (the fall into the abyss of weddings where there literally is no bottom) of Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright getting married, and Jax is defining Brittany as the perfect girl for him for one reason and one reason only: she’s the only one who stayed. Every other girl eventually wised up and dumped his cheating, trifling, philandering, narcissistic, manipulating, lying impregnating, betraying, ass. Everyone but Brittany, who wants the wedding in a phony castle and the princess fantasy of turning the beast into a man far more than she wants the man. Um, Brit there’s a reason the Disney movies end with the wedding.