Sometimes I feel like if I ever hear the words Kim Kardashian again I might vomit. I guess I'm in the wrong line of work then, right?
The latest snafu in the never-ending divorce between Kim and husband of a second Kris Humphries, is that Kim's lawyer, Laura Wasser, accuses the NBA player of making threats to expose her reality shows as fake to get money in the divorce settlement.
If you recall, Kris who was villainized on Kourtney & Kim Take New York (which coincided to Kim's divorce filing), decided to examine other Kardashian shows featuring their relationship, such as Keeping Up With The Kardashians to prove she married (and divorced) him as a publicity stunt and their marriage was a made-for-TV fraud on Kim's end.
Well this isn't sitting well with the infamous Kardashian derriere!
And this season, Taylor is taking a decidedly different stance! Hoping to earn brownie points with Lisa, perhaps? Trying desperately to gain some fan support? Absolutely! Taylor is as fairweather a person as you're ever gonna find. I mean how did she suddenly become Brandi Glanville's biggest fan?
In her Bravo blog, Taylor accuses Adrienne of lying about agreeing to be daughter Kennedy's godmother. Isn't it ironic that Taylor is getting tired of someone's lies. I can totally relate…
Taylor appeared on Watch What Happens Live last night where she got down and dirty – and the little wino that is did not hold back.
“Adrienne’s a liar, and I’m tired of the lies,” Taylor informed Andy Cohen. “I would like for her to admit that there’s either a letter or there’s not. I'm tired of having to live with an elephant in the room when we're all trying to have a good time." From one liar to another, a little piece of advice…
"I think there's a physical letter," Taylor slurred. "I think it’s either true, or not, and Brandi [Glanville] has the letter!” Interesting how quickly things can change.
Somebody needs to revoke Jax Taylor's Food Handler's card because our pretty male model made a serious faux pas on last night's Vanderpump Rules with ladylove of the minute Laura Leigh!
Everyone's favorite little reincarnated Minnie Mouse whose voice floats and squeaks with aplomb christened SUR with Jax in a little late-night bathroom hooking up. ON THE FLOOR. Of the VIP bathroom. According to the security guard, he walked in and saw Jax and Laura Leigh trousers down, getting busy. He promptly phoned Ken, who promptly called a PR meeting where he informed the flabbergasted Lisa Vanderpump about extracurricular activities in the workplace. Oh dear – what. a. mess. Literally and figuratively.
I have two things to say about this: 1) Does LL seriously want to be thought of as the gross desperate girl who gets busy on a public restroom floor? Even Britney Spears isn't that dirty.
2) Did Lisa seriously let that get featured on television? Image problem is right! And apparently this is a bit of a trend with LL because the next night she and Jax are out to dinner and they slip into the employee bathroom to reenact their magical moment. Where are the police with public indecency citations when we need them?
Well if ever there was a reason to recklessly abandon tea and convert to coffee, last night's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was it! Does tea just bring out the worst behavior in everyone – or is that wine? Or is it actually just that 3/4 of the people on this show are hideous specimens of humanity?
So Lisa Vanderpump tried to make amends last night. She took all her fancy British etiquette and tried to apply it to unscrupulous famewhores. Logic fail! She began with Splits Richards, whom Lisa had always believed to be a fun person, a friend, but underneath all Kyle's layers of caftans and hair lie a woman possessed. Possessed with the desire to be important and relevant – and most importantly famous. Enter Reality TV.
Then Lisa tried with Adrienne Maloof who was let out of the cryogenic freezer before her face fully thawed to socialize with the ladies. Adrienne's equally unappealing friend (and Kyle's Doppelganger) Faye Resnick was also hauled out for the unappetizing occasion. More on that thoughtless and repulsive decision later.
Tonight Lisa Vanderpump will finally sit Splits Richards down and explain a little thing called friendship to her. It goes like this: have friend, be loyal. Have friend: defend her in unpleasant situations. Have friend: do not plan to conspiratorially gang-up on her during a Real Housewives of Beverly HIlls reunion. I hope Splits gets it.
With their crumbling friendship finally being addressed on last week's episode and Lisa wondering why on earth Kyle is willing to defend everyone else (like her nemesis Adrienne Maloof), but never her, both ladies took to their Bravo blogs to share.
"I don't agree with Kyle's interpretation of the conversation 'Lisa and Camille [Grammer] got into it.' Umm no we didn't. Camille threw unwarranted accusations out of nowhere, stating that I was just the face of my business. . .," LIsa begins.
Sooo… what is going on here? What tricks does ol' Le-Le have up her sleeves now?
Weeks afterBrandi Glanville came out in full-force accusing LeAnn Rimes of being addicted to adderall, alcohol, and pooper pills – all charges LeAnn adamantly denied – and mere days before Brandi's scandalous book blowing the lid off LeAnn andEddie Cibrian's scheming and homewrecking behavior hits shelves; LeAnn showed up at the Grammy's with some meat on her bones. Finally!
It's been much discussed how shortly after taking up with Eddie, LeAnn started SWF-ing the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star by shedding tons of weight, get identical boob implants, and directly copying from Brandi's wardrobe. LeAnn, formerly a normal-sized girl, kept up the charade for years.
Last night on Real Housewives of Atlanta things were light on crazy and heavy on confusion, double-speak, and tiaras. The most confusing thing happening was figuring out what languagePorsha Stewartand hubby Kordell are even speaking. I mean Porsha definitely lives in a world of her own vocabulary where meanings and pronunciation are like, kinda, irrelevind – right?!
As for Kordell, he's the king so he do what he wants and decided to tackle a little problem of Housewives diplomacy. There's no use! Is Kordell an otherworldly genius or just… um… well, not?
In other antics Cynthia Bailey decided being the hostess of a pageant also made her the queen of all she sees. Lady Bailey was rocking her little rhinestone tiara all over town in the hopes some fool would take notice of her regality – which also equated with being a biatch. I'm sure Porsha would describe it as bitchgality.
So let's begin… Kordell is turning the big 4-0. Which is like the new 15 or something. To celebrate his bithday Porsha is throwing him a Harlem Renaissance themed party. Since she's also helping Cynthia with the Miss Renaissance pageant, she's busting out a pageant gown-cum-Josephine Baker collection of dresses that are perfect for the twirl and wave. She's been reviewing Kenya Moore's Miss USA footage and practicing in secret.
'Here she comes… Miss America. Oh I mean, Miss WHOOOOOOO-S-AAAAAAAA…. '