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Courtney Stodden appeared on Bethenny Frankel's talk show today – and she confessed, "I don't read or write." On the heels of this shocking admission, Bethenny proceeded to grill  Jessica Rabbit  Courtney about a future in porn. 

Bethenny asked Courtney about her next step, adding, "A lot of people go from controversial to a porn career."  Courtney shot down any talk about porn. "I really want to focus on me," she shared. "I've learned that I need to be 19. I need to do what regular girls do." 

Bethenny quipped, "You don't look like a regular girl," to which Courtney said, "Maybe don't judge a book by its cover." Touché.

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Mark Wahlberg

I'm not trying to wish away 2013 by any stretch of the imagination, but 2014 seems to be shaping up to be just peachy in regard to new reality shows. 

The original member of the Funky Bunch turned acclaimed actor and Entourage creator? Check. My favorite member of NKOTB turned scary guy in Sixth Sense? Check. Their mother and brother Paul? The actual dudes who inspired the characters in Entourage? Check and check. Your interest has to be piqued, right?

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Courtney Stodden leaves a studio in Belgravia, after a 14 hour photoshoot

Stop the presses!  I mean, STOP THEM! There is some majorly breaking news, and you may want to sit down. Seated? Okay. Plastic Courtney Stodden and creepy Doug Hutchison are separating. Deep breaths. It's no longer just a rumor. It's for serious, y'all, as the couple has already issued a statement and everything. What's next? Kate Gosselin stops chasing the limelight? Kimye doesn't stand the test of time? Is the apocalypse upon us? 

I know what you're all thinking because I'm thinking the same thing. If this crazy kid and her crazy almost senior citizen hubby can't make it in today's world, where is the hope for the rest of us?  And dare I ask? Whatever will become of their pooch Dourtney

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kieffer delp twitter 2

So, there's shocking, "oh my God, I never saw that coming" reality television gossip, and then there's this. Because, believe me, you saw this coming and will in no way be the least bit shocked. Former Teen Mom star Jenelle Evans' former boyfriend Kieffer Delp was arrested. Again. You may remember him as the homeless dude who got the innocent Janelle hooked on Ke$ha heroin…and it was all captured by MTV's cameras.

This news is especially entertaining for me because a dear friend of mine texted me last week to see if he was missing out on any Kieffer gossip. This friend practices law in Brunswick County and was appointed to one of Kieffer's cases a while ago. Every once in a while he checks in to see if I have heard how his "old pal" is doing. So, this one is for you, buddy (although you likely knew it before I did)!

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night of a billion reality stars 300312

In today's shocking news, former spouses Jon and Kate Gosselin still aren't getting along. The one time laid back member of the Jon & Kate Plus 8 duo is decidedly more low key these days. Thankfully, Jon is no longer dating nannies, abusing Ed Hardy (that we know of), or hanging with Michael Lohan. As for Kate, she's basically the same, but tanner with a much more expensive lifestyle and sense of entitlement. It's a wonder these two didn't work…

While Jon and Kate struggle to get along, their eight children are the ones who suffer. Jon is quick to mention this to Oprah Winfrey. See how casually I mentioned that? Yes, Jon is going to be interviewed by the Big O for her series Where Are They Now?

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Private Lives of Nashville Wives

Hold onto your… CMT awards? There's a trashy really amazing new reality show on the way about the famous wives of Nashville. So this is like the soap opera Nashville only with less hottie McDeacon and more crazie mcblondie reality stars. Sign me up! 

Private Lives of Nashville Wives will be coming to TNT in a few months and the network must know they have a hit on their hands because they are unveiling the brand new bunch of famewhore wannabes cast already! Let's meet the ladies. I can presumptively call them "ladies" because I haven't seen them in action yet. 

Let's meet these ladies!

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bethenny-frankel

Another day, another diss aimed at Bethenny Frankel's talk show. Maybe it's time for Reality Tea to create a new category just for bethenny bashing!

Bethenny's talk show debuted in September and has yet to find an audience. It's falling way behind competitors like Queen Latifah, Wendy Williams, and Steve Harvey. Color me not shocked! I don't watch any of their shows, but I have a hunch their guests are a lot more interesting and likable than the likes of Farrah Abraham and Kate Gosselin.

Today's diss suggested that audience members have been complaining about Bethenny's standoffish personality. "She's cold and only walks in when she has to tape and walks out," claimed an inside source. "We're told some guests have even emailed complaints to the producers."

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osbournes-sharon-quits-agt-jack-ms-diagnosis

I think we can pretty much credit MTV with the birth of reality television thanks to the explosion of The Real World, but it didn't stop there. Think about all of the families we watch on a weekly basis, from the Robertsons to the Kardashians to everyone in between. Where did the madness begin? Some may say with a ride on the crazy train courtesy of The Osbournes.  Don't act like you didn't watch!

We saw Jack and Kelly Osbourne grow up on camera (although eldest daughter Amy didn't participate) with the always hilarious chirping busybody of a "mum" Sharon and bumbling, mumbling former death metal star Ozzy.  And, of course, don't forget their tiny pooches! Now Kelly is a fashion consultant for E! and Jack is family man–how precious is his wife? (pictured with him and his parents above)–currently competing on Dancing with the Stars…but do they ever think about going back to the days of reality television's first family?

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