Teen Mom

Teen Mom 2 recap

It seems like every time things start to improve for the Teen Mom 2 moms and dads, they take a big step back – except for Jenelle Evans, who never seems to be improving.

On last night’s episode, Jenelle’s health is rapidly deteriorating, with a list of symptoms ranging from hot flashes to an inability to spell. Kailyn Lowry works on improving her relationship with Vee Torres, but things are looking rockier between her and Javi Marroquin. Any good feelings Leah Messer had left about her relationship with Corey Simms are gone after hearing what Ali’s going through at his house. Things are still blissful in Chelsea Houska Land, especially when Adam Lind proves he hasn’t changed, even though for a split second, it seemed like he was really trying to be a better father.

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Amber Portwood & Leah

Let’s hope Amber Portwood is a lot better at paying child support than her fiance Matt Baier, because her ex Gary Shirley was awarded primary physical custody of their 7-year-old daughter BooBoo Leah!

The Teen Mom OG stars have been battling out a custody agreement for years, and recently Amber claimed they were in a good place and agreed upon joint custody. Or not! 

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Farrah Abraham is ridiculous

Farrah Abraham claims she was tricked into making her sex tapeBackdoor Teen Mom, but in a recently uncovered hilarious court filing, the Teen Mom OG star is being accused by Jonathan Lee Riches of secretly filming a sex tape with him, then blackmailing him by threatening to release it! And that’s just the tip of the iceberg in this insanely bizarre case, riddled with absolutely nonsensical claims against Farrah. Is this, like, karma?

It certainly appears that in the delusional category Farrah has met her match! Sit down. Take deep breaths – it’s this ridiculous. 

Jonathan Lee Riches claims that in 2012 he and Farrah had a rendezvous at, of all classy places, a Holiday Inn in Iowa. Faaaahncy. Unbeknowst to him, despite the fact that she was like on TV and stuff, Riches claims he had no idea that A) Farrah was underaged; and B) Farrah had secretly recorded their sexytimes. 

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Teen Mom 2 recap

Last night was the most rage-inducing episode of Teen Mom 2 this season thanks to David Eason’s (aka “Uncle Dave”) beyond creepy, awful behavior.

On the bright side, Adam Lind’s child support wasn’t mentioned at all (or it was and my brain has successfully blocked it out). Instead of forced storylines that no one cares about, we got to see the genuine Chelsea Houska deal with the very real issue of taking a six year old to get glasses.

The deployed Javi Marroquin made several appearances via FaceTime and surprised Kailyn Lowry and her friends. Leah Messer was surprised by Corey Simms’s objection to the court order grant, which she thought they had agreed was fair and best for the girls. And I was surprised and disgusted to see David calling Kaiser his kid.

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jenelle-evans

Oops she did it again? Rumor has that Jenelle Evans is pregnant with her third child. The Teen Mom 2 star is denying the latest reports, but sources are adamant that she’s expecting a baby with her newest guy, David Eason.

Fans and followers have noticed that Jenelle has been looking a little bit thicker in the middle as of late and some audience members at the reunion taping thought the same thing.  That, added to the fact that she’s been mostly only showing off photos of herself from the shoulders up, just adds more buzz to the rumors. (And you know, promoting that Flat Tummy Tea without an actual photo of said flat tummy…)

Kail Lowry & Javi Marroquin

It looks Kavi is no more!! (I so just made up “Kavi” right now out of irony.) After being plagued by divorce rumors before they even walked down the aisle, Javi Marroquin has officially hinted that he’s split from Kail Lowry. Kail is still denying it, of course.

Benefits is deployed, meanwhile all Kail can do is get her butt reshaped, then sit on it, so it’s no surprise that the Teen Mom 2 stars are having marital issues – especially with the recent gossip that Kail cheated while Javi is gone! Frankly I’m impressed they’ve lasted through 4 years of MTV paychecks

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Amber Portwood Teen Mom OG reunion

Another day, another reality star in trouble with money! This time the esteemed and prestigious honor goes to Amber Portwood!

The Teen Mom OG star who has survived Gary Time, addiction, prison, and a future Lifetime Movie candidate of a fiancè, has now been slapped with a tax lien for owing the IRS more than $130,000 in back taxes. If you add that to all the back child support Matt Baier owes these two could wallpaper one of Amber’s real estate investment properties in debt. 

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Teen Mom 2 season 8

If you’re in the mood for more of Jenelle Evans‘ never-ending drama and Leah Calvert Messer‘s never-ending excuses and denial, you’re in luck, because Teen Mom 2 is returning for an 8th season.

Despite the girls being in their mid-twenties, MTV has decided to give them yet another season to try to emulate Chelsea Houska by getting their acts together. It won’t happen, but we watch despite (and probably because of) the incessant trainwreckitude. “It’s the same story every season,” sighs a source.

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