The Twisted Sicksters Richards are still stranded in Palm Desert after the histrionic horrors of YOU STOLE MY HOUSE! Kim Richards insists she’s grown-up and is waiting for Kyle Richards to treat her like the “healthy, sober older sister who can take care of her life.” Except stupid Kyle is all Kim can’t even tell a vibrator from a lipstick and a Tuesday from a toadstool and God! Do I have to do everything, even cook eggs?! Man, if I were Kyle I would have put Ex-lax in the bitch’s eggs!
Yeah, they ate eggs instead of dealing with the destruction of the night before when Kim hoarsely screeched at Kyle to give back her house right. now. Or ELSE healthy big sober super sister Kim was going to destroy her with her inventive memory and her super weapon: the gossiping drunken lips of Boozdi, a super-villain who will swoop down from the valley with lies of attrition. Kyle meekly says she’s surprised Kim stayed after what happened, Kim just eats and plots to set a bag of Kingsley’s dog poop on fire and throw it on the grill.
Is Dr. Jeff the newest addition to the cast of Real Housewives of Atlanta? He certainly behaved the way any good newbie does on the show by complimenting the veterans and trying to navigate NeNe Leakes without looking like a total doormat, which, by the way, never works. I’d say he’s doing just fine. In a few more seasons, he may be at the same point as Kenya Moore. A man can dream, can’t he?
Initially her brand of cray confidence made her an outsider among the cast, but now Krayonce and her bullhorn have twirled into the inner circle of fabulousity. She’s found a loyal chum in Cynthia Bailey who once contractually obligated the Neenster into a friendship pact, and she’s open to finding love with a man who isn’t invisible or playing a role (well, I mean…can we confirm that?) with her recent stint on the Millionaire Matchmaker.
So remember years and year ago when Abby Lee Miller was just a teacher and Dance Moms was actually enjoyable to watch? Am I recalling it correctly, or have I clouded my memory with more positive thoughts in an effort to combat the negativity I have to watch now. It’s a total mind game. You know who else likes mind games? Sia. On last night’s episode, the world is finally introduced to this video. Many found it to be artistic, some found it to be highly inappropriate, but I was just happy to see Shia LeBeouf dancing around in a cage. People think he’s weird and controversial, but he’ll always be Louis Stevens to me. And now Louis Stevens is dancing around in a cage with Maddie the dirty wolf. What’s so wrong with that?
Maddie is excited about the video’s release, but she has a hard time explaining the concept to a confused Jill. Jill decides to just call it “artistic” and “open to interpretation” and be done with it. The other moms freak out when they learn that Kathy and her Candy Apples have assembled a brand new team of Abby’s “rejects” (Kira’s word, not mind), and they will be competing against the ALDC this week. Abby is livid, but she needs to focus on the pyramid. Kendall and Nia are on the bottom for not placing in their solos. JoJo, MacKenzie, and Kalani make up the second row for doing a wonderful job in their losing group number. Maddie maintains her place in the top spot. There will be no solos this week, as Abby wants to celebrate Maddie’s wonderful duet with Shia. She pairs Maddie with Kalani for one duet, and she pairs Kendall with JoJo for a Freaky Friday number. MacKenzie and Nia are partnered for a scary duet, which leads up to a murder in the group routine.
We weren’t the only ones tuned in on Sunday night to watch Bethenny Frankel’sinterview with Andy Cohen. It seems Jason Hoppy was glued to her every word and now he’s crying foul and ran to his attorney (aren’t his freaking divorce bills high enough yet?). Jason is considering his legal options over Bethenny mentioning their marriage and split during the interview.
Tonight on Watch What Happens Live, Andy had Kyle Richards (who looked amazing!) and Jerry O’Connell in the Clubhouse. Jerry is a Real Housewives superfan and gave Kyle major props for how she handles herself on the show with all she’s dealing with. He was also a good sport because callers who had questions for him – were all questions about the Real Housewives! Kyle talked a lot about her relationship status with Kim Richards and more.
Andy mentions that last night whenBrandi Glanville was a guest she said that she bumped into Kyle at Sephora and Kyle ran out. Kyle denied that on Twitter last night and Kyle was adamant again, “Brandi, don’t get it twisted! She ran out and I was there probably 20 minutes after she left. Let’s get this story straight. You can actually check with Sephora in SoHo.”
“Don’t you just love the dramatics of the Real Housewives Of Atlanta? I loved how Dr. Jeff was saying ‘Nene, you’re going to that place again.’ ‘Nene, you’re getting angry,’ as I calmly walked to my car. He’s got a job to do too, right? How well do I know how that works?” snarked NeNe. “It works about as well as those blue cards he was reading off of with all the producer’s notes on them! LOL!”