Reality Tea

g daybreak 17012011

Imitation should be the highest form of flattery, but sometimes it's downright creepy. 

Z-List is a reality TV cast member, hoping to shoot to fame and popularity like her idol D-List has done over the past few years.  Z-List is copying everything about D-List in a very "single white female" sort of way.  Z-List is befriending the same people, trying to network in the same social circles and even hiring the same press teams. Z-List has also had D-List's sloppy seconds in the man department, though Z denies it and hopes to vanquish the rumors ASAP.  Eye witnesses say Z and Money Bags were very openly cozied up at an after bar party, where Z was incredibly rude and obnoxious to party goers whilst she snuggled in his lap.  Random tidbit: Z also fancies herself a bit of a fortune teller.

Hint: it's NOT the duo you will all immediately assume.

 

Photo Credit: Wenn.com

chris brown 061212

 

 

Photo Credit: Wenn.com

shahs-of-sunset-season-two-finale-persia-pelooza-asa-soltan-rahmati

Last time on Shahs of Sunset, Mike Shouhed and Omid Kalantari ruined Reza Farahan's dinner party. Also, Mercedes "MJ" Javid suffered a breakdown while lunching with her horrid mother and Lilly Ghalichi was told that her on-again-off-again boyfriend of 10 years probably won't marry her as long as she's selling slutty bikinis.
 
Picking up where we left off, Lilly preaches how it's illegal to have a knife at a dinner party. What is she talking about? This skinny bitch obviously never had to cut a steak or a loaf of bread. When Asa Soltan Rahmati says she's leaving because the dinner party is "so wack. literally," Reza pushes Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi to start apologizing. A smug-faced Asa sits on her imaginary throne, waiting, and GG says, "I personally didn't want to violate you in a physical form, and I am sorry for that. I can't say that I'm sorry for the source of my anger, but I am sorry that I had to react to my anger in that way." Asa busts out the air quotes to mock GG's "apology" and says GG is crazy and doesn't deserve her friendship. 
 
Will someone please shove a diamond down Asa's throat so she shuts up? She just goes on and on, talking over GG, which makes GG lose her patience. Asa says, "You've been nothing but whack. For one year, you've been nothing but whack." GG mocks Asa right back, saying, "wha-wha-wha-whack!!!" Do adults seriously use the word whack so much? 
 
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melissa-gorga

For reasons I will never understand, everyone and their mother want to climb aboard the crazy train that is Real Housewives of New Jersey.  When I say everyone, I mean anyone who has come into contact with any of the cast members in the last two decades.  They all want to spill the beans and "take down" any number of the show's stars, most hoping for their own 15 minutes of Bravo notoriety.  Former babysitters, ex boyfriends, grocery store clerks, hair stylists, first grade recess buddies, you name it! 

Last week it was Melissa Gorga's ex beau from a million moons ago, threatening to expose her (ON screen, of course!) and this week it's a former friend.  We had sources crawling out of the woodwork this week – with several different versions of the same story, as seems to always be the case where our leading ladies, Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice, are concerned, right?

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salwa-amin-mugshot

Well, well… it took 2 minutes in famewhore kingdom before the negative aspects of reality TV (aka ruining your life!) is striking the stars of Buckwild

First there were allegations that the show is staged (as a West Virginian I can attest that it is!) and now Salwa Amin, the oldest of the group, has just been arrested for drug possession in WV early this morning! Oops. The "Curse of Jersey Shore" comes early, y'all! 

TMZ reports Salwa ( aka"Bengali in Boots") was arrested for "possession with intent to deliver," i.e. selling or distributing drugs. Unfortunately it's considered a felony offense in WV! She's scheduled for an arraignment this morning.

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Toni Braxton

It's going to be hard to Breathe Again after processing this news.  Sorry, I realize that was a horrible intro!  Toni Braxton has recently decided that she is walking away from music after a twenty year singing career.  I guess it was bound to happen.  The talented songstress has now become more known for her family's reality series than her songs.  Plus, like the majority of folks who have cameras following them around for our entertainment, Toni's been bitten by the acting bug.

The Braxton Family Values star is starring in the upcoming Lifetime movie Twist of Faith.  However, Toni uses her strong pipes as well as her acting chops to play a Gospel singer torn between two men.  It's good to know we'll still get to hear her vocals even if she's given up on making albums. 

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hbb christmas

There is nothing like the Shannon Thompson crew sporting tacky Christmas sweaters for yet another Here Comes Honey Boo Boo holiday special.  It's a tad depressing to be watching all the Christmas preparations almost two months after the fact, but I am sure I will soon be thanking my lucky stars that I didn't spend my Christmas being sneezed on by any member of this family!

The episode begins with the June, Sugar Bear, Uncle Poodle and the girls decorating for Christmas and preparing for the crew's annual canned food and toy drive.  I must commend them for their charity work.  Last year, they were able to help 108 families in need, and this year June's goal is to raise $10,000 in donations.  Sugar Bear is in charge of decorating the yard with countless light up plastic candy canes and nativity scenes, and I'm sure there will be some giant inflatable snow globes in the mix…a girl can dream at least.  In the days leading up until Christmas, the family will spend their evenings standing in the overly decorated yard with Sugar Bear dressed up as Santa.  Folks will come from miles around to see the debacle and donate items to the charity.  They locate the plastic baby Jesus in the shed, but alas, his toes have been chewed off by some animal.  I can barely get the phrase "forklift foot" out of my mouth before Chubbs steals my thunder.

Some of the decorations have seen better days, but June refuses to throw anything away.  She attempts to fix a light-up white tree to no avail, declaring it the "Leaning Tree of Pisa."  Alana shares that her mother is a hoarder and is also "bat poop crazy" when it comes to Christmas decorations.  Hey, at least she said "poop," right?  June is quite the handy woman with a roll of duct tape.  Alana stays out of the way…singing a lullaby to the plastic baby Jesus before sneezing on him.  I knew it was coming!  I have to give it to June, she goes all out with the decorations, and she takes a lot of pride in their yard as it shows their Christmas spirit.

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Courtney Stodden puts on a private pole dancing show at Eleven NightClub

Happy Monday.  We had to see it, so you do, too!  We're in this together, remember? 

Former Couples Therapy star Courtney Stodden puts on a private pole dancing show at Eleven nightclub while her hubby Doug Hutchison hovers close by. 

I'll be kind and not sticky it over on the right under "hot photos".  I'm a good friend like that.

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