Holy majoley. Nothing about the Kardashian/Jenner krowd shocks me anymore. With Kris Jenner's talk show hitting special markets this week for a test run, you had to know she would do something ridiculous in a lame ratings boost. Of course, I'm not the only one who thinks that Kris is hella annoying. Robert Kardashian's ex-wife has filed counterclaims in the lawsuit waged against her by the Kardashians, and things are bound to get ugly.
Page Six shares that Kris is already using her granddaughter North as a ploy to get attention. The pimp momager, whose show talk show debuted yesterday, teased about a special guest star when she posted a photo on Twitter and Facebook of herself cradling a baby. The caption? "You never know who will stop by our show today! #WatchKris" You know Kanye West was not informed of this madness!
The show, which premiered on Fox affiliates in Los Angeles, New York, Minneapolis, Charlotte, Phoenix, and Dallas, did not feature any famous newborns with directional names. Kris told the bummed audience, "I couldn't do that to Kim. That would be kidnapping," adding that Kim would share Nori "on her own time." However, Kris did showcase a baby…that belonged to her stylist Monica. Low, Kris. Low.
I'm going to go ahead and apologize in advance for this blog post because I know I'm going to offend people with my bluntness and stupidity…even people who roll their eyes at the mention of all things Kim Kardashian, Kanye West, little KompassNorth, and the child that is most certainly NOT America's Baby.
First things first…a quick disclaimer: just because I doubt that Kim and the tiny rapper's newborn has yet to sit up, say her first word, moonwalk, or buy her first pair of Manolos does not mean that I am in any way making fun of the baby's development. That said, the founder of the Pussycat Dolls is claiming the child is already giggling up a storm. False. Not false because I am snarky and Kim irks me, but false because I took more than my share of child development classes. I don't doubt that gas is making North make some super precious faces, but she's not actually laughing.
Oh Kris Jenner! Before the ratings for her upcoming talk show even have a chance to go south, the pimpmomager is taking every opportunity to chat about new granddaughter North while on a press tour to promote her new daytime venture.
E! shares that Kris was absolutely gushing over daughter Kim Kardashian's newborn with tiny rapper Kanye West on the TODAY show. Unfortunately, I missed it as I have made good on my promise to boycott my former favorite morning show after they aired Kris chatting about breast implants instead of observing a moment of silence for 9/11. Have you seen GMA? Loves it!
As if the name North West wasn't bad enough (although I'm sure she'll be great at following directions! Ba dum ching!), the news surrounding Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's baby's arrival is getting more and more ridiculous. A push present that could pay off my student loans four times over and three birthing suites? Geez Yeezy.
Apparently, Kanye did, in fact, put a ring on it. However, unfortunately for Kim, it wasn't of the engagement variety. They'll save the wedding hype once all the attention over Compass the baby begins to fade.
To kick things off, the former Teen Mom star recaps – again – how Farrah Superstar: Backdoor Teen Mom was born.
"I trusted [James Deen]," explains Farrah. "I became sexual involved with a person who turned out to be very disrespectful and did not keep things private. That's what led me to my big break what I'm dealing with."