The Hollywood Exes are struggling to bring back that feel-good feeling.

It’s the day after the public argument between Mayte Garcia and Jessica Canseco. Mayte called Jessica an elephant, or something, Jessica felt attacked, Jessica’s snide responses got to Mayte, and Mayte threw a wine glass out of anger. Nicole Murphy was left sitting alone, probably debating whether or not she’s paid enough to deal with this nonsense.

Andrea Kelly and Sheree Fletcher are now crying that they need some “serious retail therapy” after that “fiasco.” Funny, since those two are the ones responsible for the public showdown. Mayte had been avoiding Jessica since Palm Springs, because she was having issues dealing with Jessica’s flippant attitude surrounding her abortion, and then Andrea and Sheree encouraged Mayte to talk to Jessica. Mayte and Jessica needed to talk, eventually, but in private. Not in a loud restaurant fully stocked with wine glasses. Anyway, Andrea and Sheree need some time, now, to shop and gossip.


Andrea says Mayte is very upset. Andrea truly believes Mayte intended to talk about the issue and move on. This didn’t happen, because Jessica’s actions were “malicious.” Andrea says about Jessica, “Really? You apologize, but you’re gonna put a little condescending undertone on it?”

Sheree thinks Jessica’s position was too flippy – Jessica is sorry, Jessica doesn’t care, Jessica wants to be friends, Jessica doesn’t want to be friends. Andrea says, “Either Jessica’s really f***ed up or I’m bipolar.” In the next breath, Andrea says, “You know what? I could snatch a patch of hair off the top of this bitch’s head.” Hmmm, to me, that sounds f***ed up. Andrea shouldn’t talk out loud says because Jessica is “half way to 80 years old,” she needs to “get right.” Sheree thinks Jessica is insecure. She’s a classic case of taking care of the outside, so she doesn’t have to deal with what’s inside.

Nicole reaches out to Jessica. Jessica and Nicole both feel like Mayte was out of line. Jessica says, “In any person’s normal social handbook, throwing glasses on the ground is not okay.” Nicole thinks Mayte was inappropriate and acting insane. Nicole feels as if Mayte crossed the line when she threw that glass and she needs to apologize to Jessica.

Nicole talks to Mayte. Nicole makes a point to tell Mayte – She understands Jessica’s position and she understands Mayte’s position; however, she thinks Mayte’s actions were inappropriate. Mayte’s tone changes. She says to the camera, “Inappropriate is Jessica is bragging about having abortions to a woman who has lost a baby.” Nicole encourages Mayte to sit down with Jessica, one on one and in private, to talk. Mayte needs to hear Jessica’s side of the story, says Nicole. Mayte says it’s not worth her time, as she’s done with Jessica. Nicole asks Mayte if she’ll apologize. Mayte says nope. Nicole asks, “Not even for throwing a glass?” Mayte says nope. Mayte says there’s nothing to talk about.

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Sheree wants Jessica to accept responsibility for what happened between her and Mayte. Sheree says, “Jessica is not the victim. Jessica had an opportunity to be a hero. She blew it. Jessica had an opportunity to help somebody get through her stuff and to connect to her pain. She blew it.” Jessica refuses to reward Mayte’s behavior. Jessica feels as if everyone is ignoring Mayte’s part in this – her anger, her temper, her under the breath comments. Sheree all but laughs at her, simply asking if they can all be cordial. Jessica says, not gonna happen. Sheree pleads with Jessica to reach out to Mayte.

Sheree continues her reign as the self-appointed Hollywood Exes one-sided peacemaker. This time, she meets with Mayte. While they’re together, they each receive a text from Jessica. Jessica invites the group to a polo match. Mayte thinks her invite is a mistake. Sheree questions Jessica, she says Mayte’s invite is intentional and sincere. After talking to Sheree, Mayte realizes she doesn’t want to hold any grudges. That said, she’s not sure if she’s ready to accept Jessica’s invitation.

Percy and Andrea go on a date. Percy is horny.

What happens next is Twilight Zone levels of weird. Percy tells Andrea she looks beautiful and asks, “You going somewhere else tonight?” She says just to the “crib.” He asks, “Whose crib? Am I invited?” It’s all funny, and then Percy asks Andrea if she’s been getting any action since divorcing R. Kelly. Who says this?! Andrea says, “My vagina pleads the fifth.”

Percy wants Andrea to take him to Chicago, meet her kids. I suspect he wants to have backyard barbecues with R. Kelly. The whole nine yards. He vows to always be honest with Andrea. She says, “That’s a good thing.” Percy says, “If that’s enough, then maybe we should be together.” He repeats it… Andrea clams up. She says to the camera, “He means “us” are now a “we.” It made me freak, like someone cut my air off.”

In other Hollywood Exes news, Sheree calls the product manager of her branded product Whoop Ash. She’s complaining because the latest batch of Whoop Ash has a weird consistency. Nicole meets with Camille Flawless, a high-end dress designer. Nicole modeled for Camille, and she’s seeing the photos for the first time. No surprise, she looks amazing! Nicole’s photo will represent Flawless on a billboard, online, and in Vogue magazine. Nicole’s like, not bad for 44 years old! Not bad at all – I mean, at least for being “halfway to 88.”

Nicole and Jessica travel to Vegas to see the Flawless billboard. They scream like school girls and pour champaign right there on the side of the road.Check it out:

Mayte sees a therapist. Mayte explains how being in this circle of friends, who are all moms, is affecting her. The therapist tells Mayte, “You’re a mom who lost her child.” This simple statement strikes Mayte. She is a mom – this is a new concept to her. In order to heal, Mayte needs to talk about what has happened to her.

It’s the day of the polo match. Sheree cannot go because of church. Jessica and Nicole are the only two there. Mayte did not RSVP, so Jessica assumes she isn’t coming. Andrea’s RSVP is maybe. Andrea and Mayte walk in. “I was shocked,” Jessica says. “Who shows up to an event but doesn’t RSVP?”

The mood is good. Andrea tells the women about her conversation with Percy. Andrea knows she isn’t ready for the commitment. Andrea still needs to break the news to Percy. The women have a great time stomping divots at halftime. “After seeing Pretty Woman, I think every girl has wanted to stomp a divot or two,” Mayte says. Indeed. Jessica pulls Mayte aside. Nicole hopes nothing gets thrown this time. Jessica talks. “I’m sitting here and I’m trying to be the bigger person, the better person, I invited you and wanted to come together as a group,” Jessica tells her. Mayte is biting her tongue. “I’m sorry, she’s the better person? I’m the better person for showing up,” Mayte says to the camera.

Jessica wants to talk with Mayte, another day and another time, and Mayte agrees. For now, they’ll each put on a fake smile and enjoy the day. “Thank the lord they both came back in one piece,” Andrea says. “But, I’m not sure there’s going to be a happy ending for both of them.”


Photo credit: VH1