BBW LA Reunion Part One: I Was Tardy For The Party

bbw reunion1

RT readers and Basketball Wives LA fans, please accept my sincerest apologies.  I had no clue that the first half of the reunion was airing immediately after the finale, and for some reason my season pass didn't record it.  I realize it's a week late, but I hope you enjoy the recap.  The second half of the reunion will be posted later today.

John Salley introduces the newbies, and is it just me, or is he dressed like Willie Wonka?  He welcomes Brooke Bailey and Bambi before touting the veterans, Gloria Govan, Laura Govan, Malaysia Pargo, Draya Michele…and of course, the lady who carried the season, Jackie Christie.  John shares that this year the reunion will have some surprises and many more fan questions.  Jackie is sporting her finest vinyl dominatrix attire.  We revisit the beginning of the season when Malaysia was trying to get the girls on board with reconciling with Jackie.  We all know how that went!  Jackie reveals that she returned to prove that she wasn't the pot stirrer we saw last season.  Uh huh.

Starting in with the viewer questions, John asks why Malaysia worked so hard to bring Jackie back into the group.  Malaysia counters that she is an actual basketball wife (smack in the face of 90% of her co-stars), and her breasts on On Display, as Melissa Gorga would say.  Another viewer wonders about Laura's evil behavior to Jackie, and Laura owns up to it.  Her girls are also all out for us to see.  I'm starting to notice that they all are…except for that random blonde chick…oh wait, that's Bambi.  🙂  Laura and Jackie get into a back-and-forth about Laura's need for tit-for-tat.  Insults are hurled and John Salley can't seem to bring the women back into the Chocolate Factory. VH1, you are usually so generous with the subtitles….what happened?

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John treats us to a montage featuring the new girls.  Bambi is rapping, Brooke is "modeling" while forging a faux friendship with Draya.  Their novice moves with the ladies and gossip are highlighted.  Fight footage ensues.  Lord, it was a long season!  Brooke looks really good at the reunion, while Bambi is channeling her inner Jessica Simpson…if Jessica Simpson scored the lead in "Splash."  Brooke downplays her issues with Bambi, while Bambi relives the story of the guy who caused the rift in their relationship.  Draya and Gloria look on with very sour expressions on their faces. 

A viewer question revives the discord between Gloria and Bambi, and Bambi is quick to state that Gloria had no reason to call her a "freshman" for being new to the show.  Gloria is quick to step in, stating that she was the sole reason for the spin-off.  Brag much?  She is hell bent on making sure that people know that the Sisters Govan built this ship.  Malaysia comes to her best friend Bambi's defense, and Bambi proceeds to argue with Laura's Cleopatra bangs while John grins knowingly at the camera. 

Bambi shares that she was drawn to Jackie because she's a fair person.  Bambi feels that Jackie got an unfair shake this season when she should have received a fresh slate.  A viewer wonders why the newbies were brought into the cast, and Gloria seconds his assertion.  She's unsure why the producers would bring Bambi into the mix.  They, of course, talk over one another, and I have no clue how the actual question was even answered!

John reminds Draya and Brooke of their cover model battle and shows video of the photo shoot heard 'round VH1.  John wants to start a dialog about the dreaded shoot, and Draya explains that she just didn't want Brooke–or anyone, for goodness' sake–to waste time in her make-up chair.  Draya regrets leaving the shoot, but she doesn't think she owes Brooke an apology for not throwing her a ticker tape parade.  John admits to DVRing the show for study purposes, and he seems to side with Brooke in the cover girl situation.  Brooke feels that now that the show has aired, Draya knows how she was lacking.  Apologies made, apologies accepted.  Move along, folks.  There is no drama here!

I wonder if Jackie realizes that her entire left boob is joining her cast mates on stage.  John recalls Jackie's rapping "career" but Bambi, as an actual rapper, is quick to defend her friend's rhyming skills.  Jackie then gets up to do an impromptu performance.  Classic.  When can I buy her album on iTunes?  Bless her thigh high boots.  Bambi also performs in the epic rap battle.  Amazing.  John is either playing an invisible harmonica or trying his hardest not to laugh at this madness. 

Gloria and Matt's surprise wedding (and all of the footage leading up to it) is showcased.  Gloria appears very hesitant to discuss this situation. Bambi is laughing her a$$ off listening to Gloria profess her love to a man who no longer wanted his relationship front and center on reality television.  Speaking to fan questions, Gloria promises that her wedding was totally spur of the moment.  Bambi stands by her previous statements about Gloria's rap habit (if you know what I mean). Bambi regrets saying some things…even though her statements, in her mind, were totally true.  Gloria once again reminds the fans (to mixed reviews from the audience) that she is the reason for this show.  She also won't comment on whether the cheating rumors are true or not.  I think we all know that if they were false, she'd be fighting tooth and nail to make sure the viewers knew about it.  Gloria hates being called boring by Bambi, so she keeps reiterating that it's her show.  Yawn. 

John decides to go all Newlywed Game on us.  He asks who is the most trustworthy woman, and the majority of women vote for themselves.  Jackie is voted biggest liar.  As for the lady who shouldn't return for season three?  John leaves us hanging for the second half of the reunion.  You sly dog!

TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT THE FIRST HALF OF THE REUNION?  THANKS TO THOSE OF YOU WHO WATCHED IT TWICE! 🙂

[Photo Credit: VH1]

 

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